the darkness

the darkness is a burden i tell you,
constantly shoving it in small places,
to hide its many seeking faces...
to break free the rhythm it used to know...
i tear it down before it grows,
before anyone knows,
and i guess i could be the sadest person,
but im no one to compette,
for such a selfish feeling...
i feel bad often for how i treat you,
how i am not how i used to be,
i never used to think i was pretty,
and shockingly i still dont,
and it wont be any time soon....
maybe im filling in for the compliments you never gave me?
the flowers you never bought me,
and the surprises i DO deserve,
in which i convinced myself maybe i dont....
maybe sex is special,
but not enough for me,
if i cant undestand it...
maybe i am the rebel,
you wished you were,
but couldn't be...
maybe im upset still,
not the way it was suppose to e,
but ive accepted the facts,
you used to know me,
and now its the broken me...
the darkness as it succeeds,
and you may not know im dark,
because i am not....