Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

the girl.

Andrew Eisenschenk


her body roams a quaint, iridescent stage, as smoke fills the air.

a burning cigarette, left unattended in an ashtray.

and there is no remorse. a quiet sense of clarity.
immersed across a night lit stroll, an empty street corner.

“you see, what we’re all missing, it’s distinction.”

and again, it’s set in her eyes, passionately screaming.


Author notes

short poems

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • Tarja
    October 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    SilverScent is crazy. This deserves AT LEAST a silver trophy. .... The description and the ... the way you can say so much with so few words is... stunning to me. Bravo again.

  • more like war
    April 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I loved the last line. it's set in her eyes, passionately screaming. It's such a great image. I really liked this poem.


  • silverscent gold member
    March 11, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I liked the simple format of this, it allows me to contradict my normal view, as the lack of capital letters added emphasis. I thought your diction was consistant, and blunt in manner. I liked it. Thanks for entering.


  • out of focus
    March 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is very beautiful, tightly crafted, and powerful. you have poignant descriptions with great use of words and metaphors. the last line really locks the poem into focus. well done!