Something stirring
somewhere near,
singing something
so sincere.
Steal my whispers,
reimpose,
make what's meek
become a rose
who speaks in swirls
to only me,
who feeds me cake
and spanish tea.
Something stirring
so refined,
save me from
the lines I've signed.
Catch me when
the clouds that cry
release the things
they hold inside,
'til in your hands
you're holding me,
'til songs are sung
of spanish tea.
Something stirring
in the air,
keep me close
and hold me there,
there where colors
bleed from red,
from autumn winds,
this ruby thread...
could find the blue
that swims in me
and fuse me through
my spanish tea.
Author notes
this poem is for the person I love.. who is part Spanish and who's name starts with a "T" 
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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I love this. Beautiful.
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Very nice ...
of course, and reading it out loud is, as always, a delight to the ear.
I wonder, as I always do, why people on here seem determined to use 'til when till looks so much better on the page. Then again, there's so much oddness or weirdness going on Ap nowadays that that's definitely small potatoes in comparison. Thankfully, you are not one of those who desecrate the English language like a juvenile vandal verbally sacking Rome.
I've seen you write better poems, and this one is a bit cutesy in comparison, but even at your worst you're better than many at their best. I guess one of the things I've always liked about your writing is the total lack of malice, which stands out here on AP like a sore thumb.
Anyway, for what it is, this is a nice little poem, and it's fun to read aloud. Keep on writing and keep on keeping on.
Happy Holidays.
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When it comes down to- 'til -versus- till -versus- until -I always aim for the latter. I honestly detest unnecessary punctuation but I wholeheartedly admit to having been a serial criminal of using it. When the bounce of a poem can shift victoriously without that extra syllable here or there, that's when the battle of negotiations begins. Though specifically concerning- 'til -versus- till -I guess I tend to favor the former but only because I envision clods of rotating dirt when I see the latter. Let me show you:
His long unbroken road
waited with shivering fertility.
The planting of a garden
is a promise not to travel,
but to grow..
to journey inwards
till we are home.
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It's obvously one of those ...
you have to have been there things. It certainly looks fine to me that way, but then you'd never in life catch me using 'til. I think it looks tacky and silly, somewhat on the level of e'er and n'er and I even saw "pow'r" in a poem just recently. To me it's only part of the gradual degradation of the English language, which many people on here seem to be deliberately fomenting. It's not as bad as when they use verbs and adjectives for nouns, or "I could of" when thy mean "I could have", but it's getting right up there with them.
I actually am concerned enough about that sort of thing that I have a contest going on now about the systematic degradation of the English language.
One of things I've always liked about your writing is that you don't normally engage in that sort of nonsense. Of course, I also like your superb ability to handle rhyme and you normally have a good vocabulary to go with it. I remember some really excellent poems you've posted over the years. Anyway, since I'm very ill right now, I am going to tie this up and go take a pain pill.
You have a great holiday season.
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happy holidays to you too and get well!
the example above is a specific time I WOULD spell the word "till" as a homonym because the context called for the image of clods of rotating dirt (hence gardening).
i have a very small sense of humor lately so you'll have to forgive my tiny thought process here.
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this was really good love the flow of it and the idea, bravo
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Nice poem...
..... this one was a pleasure to read, and read aloud I have to say it flows very well. Well penned, thanks for featuring it or I would have missed it!
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The Sky Still Shines (over my red, red rose)
Considering
the cost
of a friend
may seem difficult
today more than ever before
but whatever that number is..
I'll pay it.
No time, no space
between silent cold fronts
could touch
the things I've touched
tell me how long it'll take our fibers
to replant themselves..
I'll wait.
The empty moment
that swallowed
everything deserving in me
has passed
and all that I have left..
I'll give.
Your satin petals
are more worthy of love
than they could ever
imagine
or undo
so tell me what it costs..
it's yours. -
I agree...the ink you used to write this
had a lovely flow to it.....
and your imagery is ...stunning to enjoy!
What a clever prompt...spanish tea!
BRAVO! BRAVO!
ears/Kathleen/Seattle
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I loved the rhythm and rhyme scheme in this poem. It seemed to flow so fluidly and naturally!
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this a very interesting concept
how spanish teas is compared to emotion
and at the end it is similiar to a color
how it gives you so many feeling
interesting style too -
i do miss hearing this poem from your lips
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I miss reading your work. Come summer, we're definitely doing some catching up. I still read through your book all the time. Are you going to put out another with the same company?
Where to begin (I'm a bit rusty at this)... meter. Right, so what's the point? You do it better than I do, and it's the only quality I have going for me. If I want a good melodic piece of poetry, you're always a dependable source. Down to the conclusion - purely pleasant prosody. Boy do I have competition...
The parallelisms that you modelled this piece around worked wonders for capturing mood.
This is where imagery, energy, movement and emotion collide. If AP were represented by a constellation, you wouldn't be a star, you'd be a supernova. What a fulfilling poem.
Delish
- Corey
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i've bought a large notebook today to write down all of my favorite poems on here that i've met over the years, so that i may keep them with me throughout my life time. this is definitely going in there greg.
you're awesome. i'm sure many more of your oldies will too.
j -
That was so brilliantly written. Very sweet. Keep it up. Stacey
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