We wrote with magic markers
“I love you, I‘ll never leave you”
in the snow, middle winter.
And I, rushing against spring’s thaw
tried so hard to give
our truth a home.
We carried certainty with confidence.
Love always wins in the end.
Right?
Fools. All things are temporary,
sliding away like grease
from forgotten pictures framed,
but never etched in memory.
Now, we work to paint the walls
the same color, just different shades.
Reinventing love and self
from “we” to “I”
in shivering notions of a world
designed to sell our folly.
Author notes
Originally inspired by the phrase “grease of forgotten pictures” (slightly altered in my poem) with “shivering notions of a world” being a surprise (to me) at the end.
It's very hard for me to explain where this poem came from, as it took a direction I was not expecting OR wanting. Perhaps I have some repressed feelings concerning my love life. lol
Link to "Everything is Temporary 2" :
http://allpoetry.com/poem/show/2880266
A contest entry
- Poets Survivor Season Two- HEATS #1- (TOP 30) by Ryno.
300 points, ended March 10, 2007, 13 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me Emotion, I'll Give You 7000 Points by Triste.
7000 points, ended April 28, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - "MEMBERS OF HUGH WYLES FAVOURITES GROUP ONLY" No. 12 by huguenauties.
750 points, ended May 30, 2007, 19 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 40 of 40
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'Now, we work to paint the walls
the same color, just different shades'
That is exactly what I've been doing since past year.
It's sad to see things get to an end when we expected them to last.
I read this poem few days ago, and felt myself related to it (I know that the related word is used like zillion times, but that is what happened). Yet, I came to the conclusion that sometimes temporary is good, specially when we make our lives turn to a better direction.
Excellent poem!
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The reality of love is joy and pain. You have shared both ends with this poignant poem. I am a lover of poetry that spills from the truth of heart. This is extremely well penned. I wish you well in the contest.
Much Love ♥
Renee
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Thank you for taking the time to enter. We appreciate your talents. Best of luck to you
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It could be my niece talking - how sad when the love of one's life is suddenly no more.
Cheers
Anne
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Dear Trista, Sometimes we think we love somebody only to find out it's not reciprocated.
A beautiful poem that I enjoyed reading very much.
Hine.
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Dear Trista, I can agree with you here as I've been down that road several times in the past.
Beautifully written.
Jen.
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We always mean it when we say we love someone, but sometimes it can't compete with other obligations and wishes. It's very sad, "Reinventing love and self" and it hurts, but it must be done. Your second stanza makes my throat catch. Great poem.
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Very nicely done!
Your well-written poem reminds me of the song, "If love never lasts forever, what's forever for?"
Best of Luck in the contest!
Maureen
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Dear Trista,
A very lovely poem my dear. It's amazing how we start out writing a particular and our muse takes on another journey, one we least expect.
Joan
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Dear Julie,
I think you may have had a difficult choice between this poem and it's follower, both of which I enjoyed equally in spiute of their melancholy mood.
The emotions are clearly expressed and I see you won bronze in the earlier contest for which this was written.
"Now, we work to paint the walls
the same color, just different shades.
Reinventing love and self
from “we” to “I”
What a power of thought and feeling is expressed in those lines!
I wish you best of luck in the voting for this contest.
Applause, love and hugs, XXX Hugh R.
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Also, I am waiting for your second non-prewritten entry into this contest. Please be aware that only a few more spots are left, and if you don't have the second poem by then or the closing day I will have to disqualify this piece. Which I really don't want to do.
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Thanks so much for the critque and the reminder to get my second piece in. I'm judging a contest of my own and almost forgot about this.
I will try to get the other part in quickly.
Much thanks,
~J.
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Very, very nicely written poem. I love the way you phrase your thoughts here. Your emotions stand out clearly and it flowed smoothly from stanza to stanza, each thought connected. The message you send out made me focus on your words and wonder what was really being said between the lines, and I love it when reading a poem mentally stimulates me. Thank you for this entry.
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How often the little things that make "love" last take so much work. We, adn I statments become easy to do. Just as painting that wall white again, just another varying shade. Takes work to make a relationship last. Great poem, good luck in your contest. ~Sie
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i loved your poem it's so sad, good luck
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All things change, that is sometimes the only constant. What once was is no more. We sometimes want things to turn our so perfectly, that we forget about the other person and their wishes too. Hard to admit defeat and move on at times to something new.
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You have done a really good job with this melancauley piece. Great imagery and nice flow & tone, good word choice and alliteration. Reflective and sad.
Love & Light
Debbera -
So sad, so depressing, so true. The pedestals we build for ourselves and our significant others are more often than not vague and insubstantial. So very sad and so poingnantly expressed. Thank you for this piece, it struck a nerve in me
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Wow. So often poems like this fall into cliches and they end up missing the real impact of this kind of loss, but you have created something very real and relatable as well as honest. I love this sentence "And I, rushing against spring’s thaw
tried so hard to give
our truth a home." That one kind of struck me. As well as "in shivering notions of a world
designed to sell our folly" not only was that sentence written brilliantly but it is so true and creates alot to think about. How vulnerable our ideals and hopes are and how easily they can be tainted, changed or destroyed.
Thank you for sharing this, best wishes to you.
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Wow
Holy shit. That was wonderful, the imagery was amazing and it's all so true. It reminds me of my philosphy on life. Everything is transistory. Just life in the Tao...
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Now, we work to paint the walls
the same color, just different shades.
Reinventing love and self
from “we” to “I”
SO very true...this is fantastic
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This is so raw, and 'take it or leave it' true. I like your second verse,and you use such powerful words. I found this poem very captivating.
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A powerfully visual opening stanza! It grabbed my attention and held until the end. "We carried certainty with confidence" is a brilliant line! When we think of our love as being so stable, so strong, unbreakable and everlasting, worlds can crumble when we find out we were wrong. And how can we ever love like that again if we trusted so much this time and it turned out not to be so? Wonderful imagery in this piece. "From 'we' to 'I'" just about says it all, but at least in "I", we can have that certainty that we need so much. Bravo on this write and best of luck to you in the contest. Best, Elizabeth
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YES YES YES
I remember your weak [no offence] poem in the audition round, I only put you through because of the potential I saw, I have to admit, and you just proved me write. IMPROVEMENT IS A KEY!! Excellent.
~Ryan~ -
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Ryan,
Thanks so much for both the "YES" and for having faith in me after the audition round. I don't know what possessed me to enter that particular poem, which I knew had absolutely no emotion in it.
Anyway, I'm thankful I had the opportunity to redeem myself here. 
Good luck with the contest and best wishes,
~J.
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Yes
I remember you from round one.
This was very profound. Excellent. -
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Tyler,
Thanks so much. I've been reading your comments on the other poems in the competition and know you are a tough but fair critic, so I really appreciate it.
Best wishes,
~J. -
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lol im not that bad. Just honest.
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Isn't "tough but fair" the same as honest? lol
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Beautiful
Beautiful, touching, from a soul that only longs for love and the light of truth. A bright place that shines from... within.
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Bob,
Thank you...
Much love,
~J.
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The intricate details of dark arguments permeates this piece. The way you tied two concepts together was seamless. This somehow smacks of hope through cynicism (which mops up sarcasms' melt-down in the spring). But somehow, I feel true love is forever (I'm not using this as an opportunity to argue a point...I'm simply sharing where this poem leads me). The "The faults of our [whomever] are written in sand, but their virtues we engraved upon our hearts.", is maybe legit? Love is forever. That's what makes it so difficult. To love the Missing In Action.
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Timothy,
Every time I've read over this since writing it, I've been aware of the cynicism and sarcasm, and it surprises me. I ask myself, "Where on earth did this come from???" I too believe true love IS forever, and yet there are times I wish it were not...simply because I don't know where it leaves me now, in the realm of trying to love that way ever again with someone new. 
I've had just a couple of poems ever that seemed to write themselves in a direction I could not control, and this is one of them. I thank you for your very perceptive insights. Be rest assured though, I will always believe in love for its best qualities and despite its worst.
Love ands
~J.
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i love the imagery you brushed throughout but that first stanza really grabs and holds on. yes everything is temporary in life including life and that makes me appreciate everything more. great write here sweetie! keep writing, i look forward to more of your works. God bless you always
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Hi debilynn,
As always, I appreciate your reading and commenting on my work. And you're right...there is good reason to appreciate everything in life, temporary or not.
Much love,
~J.
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Excellent
The words are quite lovely
even more is the meaning convayed here
Love the symbolizem of the opening stanza
and the pathetic truth revieled further in
Love is such a veartible
It may or my not be ours forever
This was excellent to read
Rick
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P.S. You may want to read my reply to Timothy on this as well, after which you and I can debate the theory of "true love forever".
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Hi Trista
I have had some difficulity with the word "Forever" lately, so I am not sure I am in a very good position to launch a very sudsesfull debate on the subject
Therefore, I will pass... lol
Love Rick -
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Yeah, I know. That is why I want to debate. I will win.
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Rick,
Thank you for saying "excellent". I know you don't use the word lightly. I too am partial to the first stanza, but as a whole it came out better than I think I expected.
Love ya,
~J.
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