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Butterflies

Her butterflies were eager,
and so were his.
They danced, and fell over
in excitement - a thud to the heart.

A melody rang,
echoing with devotion’s delight,
as heads turned to attention.

Her ivory foot lifted in hilarity,
and a grin slipped beneath
blushing cheeks.

He caught his breath,
in a treasured sigh
and held out his hand,
to take hers - forever.

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • Candy6
    May 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    A lovely poem....check my "Butterfly", poem out. Could u please.....


  • leander Moderators member
    April 23, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    What a lovely little snippet of happyness this is and here I grow silent lol. I can only click the applaud and submit button


  • Dalaney gold member
    April 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I love it when a poem actually
    "takes me away" and this piece
    really did. I could feel the
    joy and it made me smile

    Love, Lane


  • Grey Mouser
    March 10, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Reminds me of the moment that a groom is slipping the garter off of his brides thigh, then reaching out his hand to her to carry her into the future forever.
    Very well written and so very joyfull. Thank you for the entry into the contest.
    Be well and be blessed,
    Mouser


  • xxemokevinxx
    March 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    garbage

    This contest is supposed to be about joy, but this seemed sad in almost a way. It wasn't the best I've read, but it's not the worst. Nice voice.

  • oldpoets
    March 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    good

    Not a great peice but not all that bad, good. None of us can be great all the time. This is plenty good enough


  • BabyBun silver member
    March 5, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Joyful

    A really nice sentiment - I especially liked the last two lines. Very accomplished work.


  • Regenhart
    March 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This made me smile
    It's a happy poem alright!
    Glad I read this today, made my day


  • Tirrell
    March 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    A captured moment of joy. Nicely composed, I love the gentle rhythem you have chosen for it adds depth and impact to the happy thoughts here within. Perfect! Best of luck for the contest.


  • autumns ashes
    March 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I love this so much because it's a genuinely happy story of love, and the innocence it creates in people. I love the last line especially, it rounds off the whole poem very well

    This makes me smile a lot

1 - 10 of 10