call him up and say goodbye
hang up before you hear him cry
get in the tub and grab the blade
turn on the water, drown out the sounds to be made
put the blade to your wrist, start to carve
his name in your arm, causing harm
he's put you down, called you names
so for this, he is to blame
jump as you hear the doorbell ring
hear him scream your name, you don't move a thing
you continue carving his name into your arm
he's in the window watching you causing yourself harm
whisper goodbye, you're fading fast
jump again as your hear a crash
he breaks the window and jumps in
crying at what he sees in your skin
you fall over, no longer having the energy to sit up
he catches you, begging and pleading "don't give up!"
he cradles you in his arms and begins to speak
you try to understand him as he weeps
he says he's sorry and he loves you
he didn't realize what he'd put you through
you reach up your hand, carress his cheek
you whisper softly "shh, don't speak"
you muster up energy enough to sit up and kiss him
his lips so soft and warm, if only you'd have more time with him
but it's time to go, your head falls back down
your vision is blurred by a black cloud
you stop breathing and he lays you on the floor
he gets up, heads for the door
but he sees the blade and takes it in his hand
lays next to you so he doesn't have to stand
and there in his arm, he carves your name
as you die together, leaving this world of pain
A contest entry
- Dark Love Poems by just left of right.
495 points, ended March 17, 2007, 25 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hate Me, Kill Me by thorlorn thanatos.
380 points, ended March 30, 2007, 102 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark and Depressing...Please enter by XHollowXEyesX.
700 points, ended April 6, 2007, 119 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark, Uplifting, Heartbroken, Whatever. by All u wanted me 2 b.
600 points, ended April 25, 2007, 56 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark.Emo.Dark.Emo. by BloodCrusted.
450 points, ended May 14, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything by HerbalGoat.
456 points, ended May 24, 2007, 56 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - what's your best? by Silent.enigma.
750 points, ended May 21, 2007, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Celebrating 150 by intanglio2ring.
750 points, ended May 23, 2007, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me your best (((Round One))) by Lie 2 Me Once Again.
430 points, ended June 25, 2007, 44 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Great write
Thank you for entering
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OUCH!
After this weekend when my son fell and sliced the base of his thumb - I can share the pain I felt to see him get stitches - to do the self-harm/suicide is unthinkable for me! Life is so precious!
This hurts my heart!
I appreciate your entry & Good Luck in my contest!
Tang
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good write. thanks for entering my contest and i wish you the best of luck.
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Wow. Reminds me of my longest relationship, except we're both still living, though we're not together anymore. Though it is very dark, and a somewhat upsetting situation, it's full of emotion.
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...
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HOLY SHIT!
I F-ING LOVE THIS!
Your soooooo good.
Wow.
Its uplifting.
lol weird i know.
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amazing
I loved this poem. It made me nearly cry because I know people (and i know personally) what cutting is like and how it affects others around them. I really loved this piece, it makes me feel like I am watching a movie. keep writing, dont change a thing!!!
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wow truly amamzing piece of work. IT made me feel like i was watching a movie. there is so much depth and emotion involved with description. IT was beautiful.dark depressing yet still a happpy ending, in som sense.
thankyou for entering and goodlcuk -
Beautiful
A good little poem about childish but strong love. It shows alot of emotion
Good luck in the contest
Ryan -
Out of all the poems in my contest this was my favorite! You stayed on topic and wrote a really great poem! Congrats!
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it's so romantic and sad! it made me want to cry!
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wow...this is really good...makes me cry...no lie...good job hun....good job...
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