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"Someday my prince will come... I hope!"

The Princess sat in her high tower,
Her brow was creased, her glance was dour,
Her hair uncombed, her coronet
Unpolished, her blue sarsenet
Gown grubby, and - I fear - unpressed...
In short, she did NOT look her best!

But then why should she? Desolate,
She sat and pined. "Where is my mate?
Where is my prince!". Such was her cry.
For princes were in short supply!
Her Dad (the King) had really tried:
He sent out heralds far and wide,
Gave her a splendid birthday ball,
Put "Suitor wanted" ads in all
The foreign papers, frantic yet,
He even tried the Internet!...

But (ah, so sad it makes me wince
To tell you!) not a single prince
Came wooing.  As all hope declined,
She pined and sat... and sat and pined...

But then one day it happened so
That she turned on the radio,
And heard a fairy Auntie tell
A tale that seemed to augur well:
She said that if a frog were kissed...
"Well, here's a chance not to be missed"!
The Princess thought. "This hint I'll take!"
And ran down to the palace lake.

Catching a frog proved far from easy,
And when she'd nabbed one, she felt queasy
At the idea of kissing it...
But... held her breath... and kissed... "Oh sh---"
She cried (her word is censored, sure,
But, put politely, means "manure"...)
But we'll forgive her exclamation,
For she had mighty provocation,
For there before her, on the bank
Crouched just a frog, green, pop-eyed, dank!...

But our Princess had been well-taught,
She'd read the history books she ought,
And she recalled from deep inside her
Memory the tale of a spider
That taught a Scottish king to heed
The maxim: "If you don't succeed
At first, then you must go on trying!"

So no more moping, no more sighing!
Each day down to the lake she went,
There at the water's edge she bent,
And, kneeling on a fallen log,
Deployed her net - and caught a frog.

But still, no luck! Each clammy brute
Remained a frog, would NOT transmute...

The days and weeks and months rolled by...
"I'll still be at it till I die!"
The Princess moaned, "for I'm afraid
That death will find me an old maid..."

But still, this is a fairy tale -
And so her efforts DID prevail...

At least... Upon a sunny morn
In mid-July, when, quite forlorn,
The Princess felt she'd never win...
The magic worked! The glaucous skin
Sloughed off, the creature stood upright,
And, Oh what bliss!  Ah what a sight
Her eyes beheld! A human male,
Young, dark, tall, handsome... Did she fail
To fall in love at first sight? No!
With smiling lips and eyes aglow,
She ran to him with arms spread wide:
"My Prince, my Prince, at last!" she cried.


The young man bowed: "Ma'mselle, bonjour!
But you 'ave made un small erreur!
'Ave you not 'eard, ma jolie wench,
Zat "Frog" is a slang term for "French"...
Je suis francais, a true French man,
And zerefore a Republican...
"A bas les aristos!" we cry!
(Today's ze quatorze of July!)
Je simply can't epouser vous...
So merci beaucoup... mais... adieu!"









A contest entry

Please do not feel obliged to comment - but if you DO comment, please understand it may be some time until I respond to you.

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Comments

1 - 65 of 65
  • Juno101
    November 21
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    Its a fine poem. Gets a little boring in the middle. Didn't make me laugh but it was nice.


  • dutch2lips gold member
    October 27

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    this was extremely well written, a loving tale in poetic form, well done
    thank you for entering my contest and I am pleased you did but I cannot add you to the final list because none of my pictures were used as prompt.

    • Vera Rich
      October 28
      Edit | Reply
      Sorry... Had I realized that use of picture "prompts" was mandatory, I would not have entered.

      But i am glad you liked it!


  • Ami
    October 19

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    Wow that's a lot of trophies! Congrats on all the trophies you've won for this so far, this really deserved everyone of them
    great imaginary this was long but flowed so perfect that it didn't matter
    awesome write Thank you so much for entering my contest and Good luck
    -♥Amy♥


  • Sheilasbabygal4life
    October 15

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    LOL! This was good and very funny! I really enjoyed reading this. It was hilarious! Thank you for entering and best of luck too you in th contest.


  • LullabyOfADeadMan
    September 2

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    if i had enough points for everyone in the contest id give you a clappy with points but sadly I cant! Great write though!! Thanks so much for the entry.

    ~~Tay.


  • XxNinjaNemoxX
    August 8
    Edit | Reply
    Hehe this was in my last contest
    And I still love it like I did then
    It's just plain awesome
    Thanks for entering and best of luck
    xoxo.

  • XxNinjaNemoxX
    July 28

    Edit | Reply
    This has been entered in a lot on contests!
    And it's been rewarded accordingly.
    I absolutely loved this
    It was cheerful, humourous and simply enjoyable.
    Congrats
    Thanks for entering and best of luck in my contest
    xoxo.


  • Fritz O skennick gold member
    June 22

    Edit | Reply

    Awesome...

    Great narrative, rhythm & flow with a great rhyme scheme & humour throughout...
    Congrats on so many well deserved trophies...
    Keep up the good work...
    Well done!!!


  • Ignis Corpus
    June 22

    Edit | Reply
    Good poem. So many contest. I see why you've gotten a trophy. This paints so many colours into a picture into my head. I liked this, and I wish you the best of luck in this contest.

    Ignis Corpus


  • Heva Feva
    June 14

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    The accent makes it very hard to read. You've entered alot of contests, glad to see some trophies, you deserve them. Good luck and thanks for entering my contest.
    -heva


  • crowd
    June 8
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    thanks for entering


  • CelticQueen
    February 2

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    My stars! Is there a contest you haven't entered with this? Normally, I would find that offputting, but this is so very well done and such a delightful read that I really can't blame you.

    Thanks for entering my contest, too. celtic queen

  • Vera Rich
    January 18
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    You do not mention "The Frog Prince" in your list of fairy tales- but I hope you will recognize it.

  • piccola silver member
    November 27, 2008
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    I really enjoyed the rhyme and flow in this. I remember in The French Connection the french were referred to as 'frogs' and I never understood it. The write is very entertaining and imaginative. Thank you for entertaining.

  • piccola silver member
    August 20, 2008
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    sometimes a frog is just a frog afterall...ugh! the kiss turned out to be for nothing. thank you for enterin


  • crivanea silver member
    August 5, 2008

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    man..how many contest is this in...lol..congrat on all those wins...cute poem..really nice...i enjoyed it..and yes...it is entertaining..imaginative..and cute..nice job..and good luck in the contest

  • piccola silver member
    August 1, 2008

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    congrats on all the trophies. This was a most enjoyable read. The ending made me laugh as did the entire write really. thank you for entering.

  • ecrivain01
    July 29, 2008

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    Sorry ...

    but I was too tired last night to realize that this is over 30 lines, the limit specified in the rules. Please enter a shorter one.

    Thanks.

    • Vera Rich
      July 29, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      I too was too tired and stressed to read the rules properly...

  • ecrivain01
    July 28, 2008
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    LOL ...

    this is hilarious. Merci beaucoup.


  • GlassSlippers
    July 24, 2008
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    Isn't that like a Frenchman? hmmph.


  • FloridaGatorQueen silver member
    July 21, 2008

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    LOL This was really funny. I loved the way you led up to the ending. She thought she got a prince but she didn't. LOL I just love it. Enjoyed the read! Thank you for entering my contest.

    • Vera Rich
      July 29, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your appreciation - and the gold award...


  • HugsForEveryone
    July 16, 2008

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    Lol!! This was funny! Iliked how you described her in the first stanza. Your vocabulary is hugeee! That was a good thing though. That was funny, about how when her prince finally came, he spoke french. Lol. Thanks for reading the rules! Thank you for entering my contest.
    Good luck in my contest!

    ~Pandy

  • jadeangyal
    July 9, 2008

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    I loved it! The vocabulary was wonderful, especially in the first stanza and near the end. You were very clever in making a Frenchy rhyme. I also loved the "oh sh--" stanza. The second stanza was not quite up to the (vocabulary) level of the rest of the poem, but I loved the poem so much that I must forgive it.

    • Vera Rich
      July 9, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Ah, at last... someone who has NOTICED the deliberately "flat" vocabulary of the second stanza (indicating the tedium of failed routine approaches), and, incidentally, leading up to the echo of the Ingoldsby Legends in the third... I congratulate you on your perception.


  • Meroza
    July 9, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    hahahahahaha! I love this!


  • Fire-Fly
    June 26, 2008

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    Very good poem, or should I say fairy tale. Well written, nicely rhymed and enjoyed reading it very much.

    Well done and good luck in my contest.


  • stylization
    June 12, 2008

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    Haha this is awesome. I could vaguely understand about half the french at the end. Great write, you deserved the trophies.


  • 2lullabyhaven
    June 11, 2008
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    Wow, this is good writing; thanks for entering lol


  • icyrose
    June 4, 2008

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    WOW

    fantastic, beautifully written! I am picky when it comes to rhyming, but u absolutely got it PERFECTLY here!! Wonderful job, and very funny read


  • Shya
    May 31, 2008

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    I loved this poem! I can't find anything bad to say about it. I'm a real critic sometimes, so that's saying something. I liked the story, and especially how nicely you wove French in at the end... the rhyming is perfect, and I like your imagery. Great job! And thank you for entering my contest.


  • xCandieKissesx
    May 14, 2008

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    I like it. It's really like a fairytale story to me. I believe I asked for no epics or stories though. But it was still great! Thanks for entering and good luck!

    + Jackie


  • Melissa Burns
    April 18, 2008

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    Oh I loved it - to bad I didn't understand the ending at all. I was (honestly) dreading this one a little, I thought by the title it would be some bit of mush rambling on about how someone feels utterly forsaken in the art of love - but I was happy to be wrong! Very witty and catches one's attention. I'm actually hosting a fairy tale contest next - keep your eye out! Oh and congrats on all your shinny toys


  • maa gold member
    April 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    that is just a masterpiece !
    your humor is just overwhelming ... smart humor, if you know what I mean ... you had my attention from the first to the very last syllable, and my smile throughout ... you especially surprised me with the frenchie at the end, I am ashamed to say it, but his accent reminded me of my hubby !!! shame on me ...

    I absolutely love this piece, thank you so much for entering it !

    maa


  • Desire gold member
    March 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Thank You!!

    Thank You for Your entry: "Someday my prince will come... I hope!"
    Oh My Word


    How I laughed so hard at this fairytale
    with a splendid ending...
    I had my drink fly out my nostrils

    These lines had me in stitches~~
    Catching a frog proved far from easy,
    And when she'd nabbed one, she felt queasy
    At the idea of kissing it...
    But... held her breath... and kissed... "Oh sh---"
    She cried (her word is censored, sure,
    But, put politely, means "manure"...)

    Love the twist at the end and also the rhyme
    I Appreciate the time You took to bring forth
    a HUGE smile to my face
    Thank You for sharing Your Humor also Spirit!
    Best wishes to You in the contest Sweet Soul
    **Judging will be done shortly...
    Many blessings too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


  • The Green Elf
    March 16, 2008

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    i loved it!!!!!! anyone can see whyit's won so many trophies. they arre well desirved (did i spell that right?) anyway another trophy may be on it's way!

  • know one
    March 2, 2008
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    awesome

    this totally rocks


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    January 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This was great! Loved your take on a fairy tale... definitely made me smile... aww the poor princess.. all that hard work and no reward! lol


  • Sue Cardwell gold member
    January 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Many thanks for taking part in contest 5. ‘Fantasy’ in our rounds of contests in the Rhyming Extravaganza.
    We have been surprised by the wide range of entries that we have had and the standard has been exceptionally high.
    Please join us in the future rounds and enter writes that we would love to read and enjoy.

    Thanks again for your entry,

    Sue and Jeff


  • gigbob18
    December 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Great job and very humerous.
    I liked this poem is was very cute.
    Thanks for entering and best of luck in the contest


  • JustBeingDevine
    November 20, 2007
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    Fantastic!

    This is very cute! I loved it...thank you for entering and good luck...


  • Frodofan silver member
    November 17, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    lol. It's not quite what I was looking for, but it'll do. Really fun read!


  • jcat gold member
    October 25, 2007

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    this was so entertaining to read. you did a great job. thank you for entering and good luck with the contest.


  • annamoy
    August 16, 2007

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    Great story telling with the unexpected twist of the french connection at the end. Very funny as well, a most enjoyable read. Congratulations on the bronze and for your previous trophies for this poem.

    Ann


  • chugglepuff
    August 16, 2007

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    Great job, very funny! The slightly odd enjambment put me off a few times, it stops it flowing so nicely, but you tell a story in this fantastically!


  • Dageek2
    August 15, 2007
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    This is hilarious! Good job and good luck in the contest!


  • Kiusha
    July 2, 2007

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    Your rhyme and rhythm are great throughout, which is quite a feat for a write this long. You kept my attention all the way and made me laugh. Very well written.


  • masterblaster gold member
    June 20, 2007
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    sorry due to extreme tiedness forgot to press the button, so catch

  • masterblaster gold member
    June 20, 2007

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    Hi Vera, as usual a great write from you, this made me fall off my chair laughing, so, if I have cracked my ribs I shall of course sue, well it's the in thing these days,lol, loved it. Di


  • lucy sky-diamond
    June 11, 2007

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    wow
    this is simply amazing
    has to be one of the best poems i have ever read, up there with roald dahl...
    im still gobsmacked
    VERY best in the contest
    lucy


  • poettrical
    June 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Excellent rhyming and rhythm - wacky and hilarious - I love the French prince and how you mixed in modern things into it! Bravo


  • Xsafety glassX
    May 11, 2007

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    'er prinze wuz a frog? but ended up french??

    funny enough to get finalists. applause to u. but unfortunately, im out of clappy dudes. offline claps


  • One Eunique Pixie
    April 6, 2007

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    I love the french at the end. That is so awesome. What a great story you told, and your flow was FLAWLESS! The french frog...ha ha ha ha ha. That girl was dumb though....I didn't like her....lol. I'm picky when it comes to princesses though. I like them just so. Thanks for sharing. Love and Peace, Charlene.

    • Vera Rich
      April 6, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      I do not particularly like her myself... But that is the way she came out!


  • Death of the Author
    March 24, 2007
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    Forgot the applause ^^

  • Death of the Author
    March 24, 2007

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    Wow, well done, thank you for entering the contest, sorry I did not comment sooner - I was away. This is really good, sweet, funny, awesome! Good luck and take care x


  • Bazza
    March 19, 2007

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    Excellent.

    Excellent write, bright and breezy with tongue in the cheek humour. The rhyming was good and a nice even flow almost lyrical and could be sung with the right accompaniment but sufficient in its' presented form. Well done Vera and worthy of the silver, as it filled the contest parameters perfectly.
    Bazza


  • Ontarah
    March 17, 2007

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    Unfortunately, I'm a bit patchy when it comes to French. I know a bit of German and Spanish but not really French. Regardless, I got enough to get the idea of what happened and it certainly put an interesting twist on the cliched fairy tale! I also really appreciate how the French rhymes just as flawlessly as the English. You certainly have a great gift for rhyme that many are sorely lacking. Your tales are very melodic with creative narratives and this one is no exception. Thanks for entering and good luck.


  • aslanlight
    March 11, 2007

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    Hilarious!

    This is one of the funniest things I've read for a while! Humour's quite difficult to get right too but you manage to pull it off; you must be a natural comic.

    Not sure if I have the french right because it's been a long time since school but from what I gather he can't marry her because it's the forth of July but I can't figure out why; perhaps you could enlighten me as I've probably missed something. No just read it again and I'm still clueless but it may be my history that's lacking!

    • Vera Rich
      March 25, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Not the FOURTH but the FOURTEENTH... The anniversary of the fall of the Bastille in 1789 (considered to be the start of the French Revolution) and now the French national day.

      (I have sent you this note before, but it seems to have deleted itself, so I am replacing it in case anyone else is puzzled!


  • Alyss in Wonderland
    March 6, 2007

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    Sorry I didn't comment this before. I've been having some trouble with my computer. (basically, every time I tried to comment someone on AP, it would freeze).
    Anyway, this is an incredible poem! I loved it. My favorite verse would definitely have to be the last.
    "Je simply can't epouser vous...
    So merci beaucoup... mais... adieu!"
    It's brilliant to be able to rhyme things in French. I don't speak French, so I sort of had to guess at what it said, but throughout the other context of the verse, I think I sort of figured it out. =]
    So, incredible poem. :-D
    ~Lyz

    • Vera Rich
      March 6, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Well, it is not so much French (the good nuns who tried to educate me, would doubtless be shocked!) as "Franglais" - but that is part of the fun, of course.

      By the way... for non-UK readers, perhaps I should mention that "Auntie" is a further joke...it is a slang term for the BBC (British Broadcasting Corporation).

      PS.. If you liked this, you might also enjoy my "Hallowe'en 1943" - which is in much the same style!

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