Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

-+- Just a Toy -+-

Missing image

 

The sun cracked a smile slightly
over hills horizon when it came,
a teardrop trickle then
waterfalls in waves cascaded
like words from a cotton mouth, mentions
of understanding yet useless tone
expressed over scribbles scribed.

Heart’s hammer chiseled in streams
with a genie bottle rubbed,  wishes wanted
between an imaginary illusion
in its rarest form.

A toy wound up within mind
but another body
for pleasure principle which led nowhere
but future failure down a windy road.

Was there a thought to perception played
after exchange of ethics understood
became eye candy craved at store window
when another announced arrival,  suddenly?

Somber shades drawn over canvas unveiled
as urges superceded reality where why’s
answer resulted with~ “I told you so Stupid”
whilst  -Love- was exsanguinated expeditiously
from every viable vein.


Author notes

Quote:
5. You said you never wanted to see me hurt, so tell me... do you close your eyes whenever you're with me?

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • crzyness101
    March 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    You did a great job =D

    Congrats


  • Lauren Noir
    March 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    The imageary in thi8s is brilliant
    And it is so clever anf fresh

    It's not your average poem for this kind of thing so I really liked reading it

    “I told you so Stupid”

    I love it
    I love most o the stanzas so I can't pick out one
    I adore the title, so clever

    Well done

    Love and hugs to you

    ~Lauren


  • BittersweetPhantasm
    March 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is an awesome poem! powerful and well written - lots of great imagery.
    one question though - what does the word exsanguinated mean?
    apart from that my fav part is the first stanza:

    The sun cracked a smile slightly
    over hills horizon when it came,
    a teardrop trickle then
    waterfalls in waves cascaded
    like words from a cotton mouth, mentions
    of understanding yet useless tone
    expressed over scribbles scribed.

    well done and good luck.


  • penman gold member
    February 28, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    A real masterful poem darling. Truly so skillful. Good luck in the contest.


  • lucy sky-diamond
    February 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is truly beautiful; such wonderfully descriptive language, i wish you best of luck inthe contest

1 - 5 of 5