Gazing
into toy shop windows~
tears
roll down a stranger's face.
Author notes
getting old
A contest entry
- In 10 words # 2 by Lavender Butterfly.
375 points, ended February 28, 2007, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Blink by RedAquarius.
440 points, ended May 11, 2007, 9 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Winner takes all - Gold for Gold by Lavender Butterfly.
300 points, ended June 7, 2007, 8 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hit Me With Your Best Shot - One Liners Only(1) by 2lullabyhaven.
745 points, ended June 12, 2007, 76 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 2 or 3 lines ONLY ANYTHING GOES! by Florida Sunshine.
450 points, ended June 24, 2007, 113 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - One Liners (GIVE ME ALL YOU GOT!) by A Murderous Lament.
600 points, ended June 19, 2007, 74 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Quickie Quest ~ Prewrite Party 2 by Namita.
300 points, ended October 6, 2007, 95 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me Your Gold - 20 words or less by Seeking Peace.
550 points, ended March 23, 2008, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrite Mania 3 by Celticmoon.
800 points, ended May 27, 2008, 49 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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I have to admit this made me think. In reading this and rereading this many different images and thoughts came to mind, all of them interesting. Thank you for entering. Best of luck to you.
Blessing
Bel
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The comparison of a toy to age really sets the tone for this well penned piece...good luck
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I just wish you would expand on ideas like this. Give it a real story, complete it. I don't think one image really makes a poem. I like this as a start (or an end) but not as a finished product.
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I've commented before.
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Aww I like this great job Best of luck in the contest and good line!
A MURDEROUS LAMENT <\33 -
aaaaaaaah, I totally believe your never too old! I' a toys r us kid! for sure! I buy more toys for me than my kid... Thanks for entering my contest!
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Oh...this is good, it took me awhile for the aha moment
but when it came I realized how truly worthy of gold this is, (iam so slow at times
) Amazing write, congrats!!
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Wow - this speaks absolute volumes in so few words. I love poetry that can express so much in little vocab. It has intense meaning and vision. Loved it. Congrats on your previous gold AND silver win with this masterpiece. Thanks for sharing... x Love and light, Butterfly.
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Succinct and striking. The realization of being "grown up" was definitely a blink moment for me. Good luck and thanks for entering.
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This was emotional, which is cool because there was only four lines.... It makes you wonder what happened.
Thank you for entering and good luck in my contest. -
hehe i seem to have come across a few of your poems tonight and like the others this was a really great write and it flowed really wel keep writting your talented and good luck in the contest.
XTashaX -
This one brings tears to my eyes. Beautiful! I love how much meaning and raw emotion you have squeezed into so few words.
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Thi is just so very beautiful.
I'm bookmarking this for later reading.
Luv,
Candy
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The major difference between men and boys, is hopefully their height and the size of their ------------- TOYS
You're not still playing with your GI Joe ...are you?
Congrats on the Gold,well deserved!
galfalfa
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A very worthy winner here - well, just worthy whether it had won or not, since what matters most is finding ourselves touching our edge ... and you have succeeded here. Admirably.
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wow - this speaks volumes. Adding that 'getting old' statement in your author's comments really made your piece jump off the screen. Very creative and wonderful.
Thanks for sharing and good luck in my contest... x
Love and light,
Butterfly.
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Clever, creative and oh so true. Well done dear poet. Good luck in the contest.
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I don't wanna grow up. I'm a ....you get the gist. A lovely melancholy and concise work. Beautifully painted picture of pathos. You've expressed the emotional response that everyone occasionally feels about aging. Well done and good luck.
jill
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Very good write Bro, well done and good luck in the contest
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you know, when i look into toyshop windows, i wonder what some of the electronic gizmos are! Another poignant write here, few words, deep as the ocean though. Nice one!
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I didn't get this at first then I seen the authors notes and it made perfect sence. We're never too old to play with toys but we sure can't avoid getting old. We can however avoid thinking old. Nice job. Really deep thoughts.
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awwwwwww.....but age is just a number,,,,you can always be a kid and go in and play...You have captured timeless ago and wonderment mixed with emotional longing with just a few words..Beautiful! Good luck my dearest pal...muuahh!
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