on crystalline stillness:
your muted lips
the forbidden fruit of love
The crisped lips: feverish
ecstasies of sweet devour
a bit of mocha sweetness;
a tinge of absolute gravity
You are metamorphosis of pedestrian love:
dissecting rough strifes
of flirtations
(that made me scream)
don't stop, don't stop
you really are my ecstasy
You are: the summer raindrops
soon splattered, soon gone
Beauty transformed into larvae:
no hopeless romantic poses
your smacks, the amorous quest
to rip blood and flesh
so barbaric, so superficial
romanticism buried in ashes
I pressed your lips (last time):
heavenly droplets
as I explore your fantasies
and you,
struck a smack of tar addiction
into my crimson lipstick prints.
Author notes
I know I am terribly late, but this is my Valentine's twist.
Project Love-fest: Poem on 'complicated love'
I hope this is all right for the contest.
Inspired by excessive trance (the muse!), best read by listening to the following songs while reading:
Forbidden Fruit - Paul van Dyk
Ecstasy, Don't Stop and Hold Me - ATB
Burn for you - Kreo
Love me right - Angel City
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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attracting title confusing poem since when i read it i dnt know if ur talking bout real cig or of love who burns u like a cig and makes u addicted to it ( am a bit twisted
) loved ur style
I pressed your lips (last time):
heavenly droplets
as I explore your fantasies
and you,
struck a smack of tar addiction
into my crimson lipstick prints.
amazing!!


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it was a very nice poem good luck in the contest...
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i'm a smoker...nicotine addict...add a certain attraction to bitter coffee and you get a very dark cocktail of vaguely unhealthy savors...
this is the most touching poem i've ever read from your amazing work...
the only difference is that i felt some kind of blues tune going about it...trance is good but sometimes it's too loud...
oh and there is love somewhere between those lines...

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I love the cynical side of your poems coming out; you described love/lust as tainted and superfluous, never lasting long enough to remember. I liked the "forbidden fruit" reference too, perhaps necessary to show how one can be both the temptress and the tempted. Speaking of structure, we're doing the second half of the poetry anthology/unseen poems so we're getting plenty of practice when it comes to identifying structure. Tell me how you're going with your submissions to that competition. x

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Dang. I like. You've done a marvelous job of using rhyme and quite a few other poetic techniques to make this piece flow seamlessly and be nearly drowning in perfect imagery. Normally, I try to give some type of critique so as to help the writer improve the piece, but for this, I can think of none other than perhaps indenting a line or two, simply to give the poem a bit more of an eye-catching look. Greatly written!






