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Behind the tall wood fence. The well-locked gates tell all who pass That none are welcome hence. The inside dark and cold. The myst’ry folk who’re living there Have stories yet untold. Reflects the ones inside. Its cold and lifeless barren boughs Where nothing can reside. Is cold and dirty white. The pock marked piles decay and melt, Their godforsaken plight. The empty rooms are stark and bare, The dashed hopes genuine. The air inside is stale. The two who hide within the walls Are sinister and pale. They peek and speculate, And when they’re asked what should be done They often vacillate. That fences hide from view Is enigmatic and it tests The mettle of we two. Their way so different? Or must we force them to "fit in" And threaten banishment? Mere figments of our mind? Do rumors so control our life That we are oft unkind? To peel back our disguise And how we treat them tells us if We’re foolish or we’re wise. |
Author notes
Reni did the painting this week while on break from college and, of course, once shown a picture like this, I have to write. She graciously allowed me to use it as an illustration for the poem . . . and of her amazing artistic talent. Thank you ma'am.
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1 - 11 of 11
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I know of nothing new I could add to previous Comments. This is very clear and strong and meaningful (in perfect poetic form, as always).
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Wow
Very real-life poem. It's the truth that we cannot just sit back and let people be different. I really liked the way you put that into words in this poem. Very Nice!!
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I just realise I haven't commented on this piece of wonderfulness!
How dare I.
It's probably because I've already showered you with praise. lol.
This is lovely.
-Reni
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this told a story that the picture depicted and thus made the two a brilliantly poetic couple.there is a whole lot of talent in these two artistic forms.one talent is just as amazing as the next.i bow down and applaud the both of you.
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I felt the sadness of this 'home', this house so forlorn and empty of life. Its occupants lonely and alone. We wonder what their lives have been like, what heartache they've had to live with, what joys they keep within their remembrance of times gone by.
Your poem is so filled with subtle emotion. It's as though the house and the people within are in a suspended state to all that's around them. You've given depth and a sense of reality to the picture.
Your poem could stand alone and still project the image of this lonely house. And the painting itself speaks even without the words, of what you've written. Both of you have given life to your works.
Dee
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i really liked your poem is so easy to imagine what your writing about
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Wow! It looks like a photograph! And this sounds like the premise for a Stephen King tale! chilling and eerie, mysterious and a spark to the curiosity. Loved it!
XXOO
DK
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what a wonderful story/poem/painting. It made me sad and at the same time what a wonderful message. I have a house near us that is sort of the same way, never really see people in there but lights on once in a while. Last summer we actually saw a person outside in the garden and found that the lady living there is trying to survive without her husband of 40+years and just doesnt ever go outside or anywhere because she never learned to drive and he was the one that drove them all over. How sad it is, but glad we met her. We make sure to wave when we walk by now, just in case shes looking out her window.
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Brilliant , Dark Poetry
about the house and two people in question. You could of not had this picture and I would of still seen this picture in my head. Many thanks to the artis. Excellent writing, vivid read........write ON!..ennovy
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Even without seeing the picture, I could have envisioned this house. You did such a fine job of illustrating it with words.. then expanding on it's life. And, as you said: the painting itself is awesome too. Good work. Debby
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Outstanding
a great image to build a narrative and a moral teaching. Ilike the color and observations that make it all seem so lived through... i enjoyed reading this..thank you
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