Drips of dew come splashing off my petals
Like tears of joy for the morning
I lift my head to the light that rises
While the sky is filled with color
Almost as vibrant as mine
Tick-tock goes the clock
Now buckets of water
Are being dumped on my head
As I raise my arms
To soak in this treasure of Nature's
The page turns again
I almost cry as a petal of mine
Is slowly losing its brilliance
At night when it fell
I sagged with the truth
That my time would soon be over
But once more He cried
And sleeping here in the wetness
I am in love with the world
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Still hood-winking... :)
This is wonderful... You beautifully captured a rose's circle of life, which can be applied to humans and all other beings as well... I really enjoyed reading this and I could feel the peaceful mood especially at the ending of the poem.
Thank you for sharing!
Keep up the fantastic work!
Annie 
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oo Carrie this is great! i really liked it a lot. you always seem to write poems that inspire me, hrmm i think im going to write one, hopefully soon. great job sweety pie! and I hope you are enjoying being hood winked by my amazing group!!!!
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What a wonderful perspective here, the joy, however brief, of a rose blossom! I loved the lighter note you ended it on as well, very tender piece all through. Best of luck in this and all of your endeavors. Hetohke'e *
YOU HAVE JUST BEEN HOODWINKED
; Courtesy of the Poetic Bandits
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Oh, how lovely this is! To be reminded that everything has its own circle of life much like our own, then having it compared to something as beautiful as a flower, is very refreshing to me. You have some really nice imagery in this piece and it flows nicely. I got a little lost in the last stanza though...that "he" in the line "But once more He cried" kinda threw me off, as I can't quite figure out who or what the "he" is...??? Maybe I am having a blond moment?
Thanks so much for sharing this on AP, it was a most enjoyable read!
Best wishes,
~J.
P.S. You've been Hood-Winked by the Poetic Bandits
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Oh! The "He" was supposed to be God, hence the capital letter. Sorry if you didn't really get it, but I'm glad you liked it!
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Thank you so much for the clarification! It is a very subtle reference, one that I totally missed. But now reading it again, it makes much more sense and adds an even greater sense of joy within the poem.
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Good job Carrie! I like it. And I'm not really back, I just had to write that, and now I come on every so often just to see if I got any comments.
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Well you should go on more often! It's wonderful here! I used to not come on often, either, and then I learned the error of my ways. Come on, you know you want to! Thanks for the comment, though!
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The wilting of a rose in comparision of human life and death! wonderful. A true Transcendentalist in comparing life with nature! i enjoyed your metaphors and similes. Great imagery. wonderful vocabulary! the only thing i would say is add a little more to your last stanza. You have effectively quenched my thirst for a good poem!!!
Drips of dew come splashing off my petals
Like tears of joy for the morning
Amazing....
~Sorrow~
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This comment made me smile. Thank you so much!
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