You are the one who carried me
when I thought that all hope was gone;
and in your troubled eyes, I see
the fire which has brought you so far.
We are broken and bound;
drawn to each other, yet torn apart.
It’s you and I against this world,
so draw your courage from my soul
as we brace ourselves for the storm.
So beautifully destroyed,
these two defensive hearts
try to deny the imminent chemistry;
yet, addicted to each other’s pain,
we reach for something.
I know you want to run away,
to leave this life behind;
But run, and I will follow you,
every step of the way,
though our hearts are torn into pieces.
But it cannot break us,
for we are strong together.
I will walk beside you
through fire and rain,
and I will hold you
when you cannot find your strength.
Lay your worries in my arms;
I will support you, stand your ground
when you feel you’ve lost your way.
So know that you are not alone,
no matter what they say to you,
for I am here to hold and guide you;
you have found a friend in me.
Author notes
I am Immortal Obscurity.
"Dedicated to a "friend" of mine, someone whom I have a lot in common with, whom I know is in need of some compassion right now. He's not feeling too well at the moment, and I want him to know that he will never be alone, even in the darkest of times."
Based on the song, “In This Together”, by Apoptygma Berzerk.
* * *
This is for my boyfriend, whom I never thought would be anything more than just a close friend. He stood by me, as a friend, when I needed one, and his love meant the world to me. We both sort of knew, in our hearts, that we cared for each other, but we had both just come out of bad relationships, and were really scared, so we had made up our minds to be good friends, with the odd benefit, and that alone. When I first wrote this, everyone read it as a love poem, and I denied that that was what it was. After all, I was never supposed to have romantic feelings for him in the first place. But I eventually realized that, yes, I did care for him, even though I was afraid to let myself trust again.
We never intended to become emotionally-attached, but it was only a matter of time before our hearts won out, and we fell in love. It has been almost a year since I wrote this, and he has been with me throughout everything.
So this is for Travis: You are my rock, my best friend, my therapist, and the love of my life... You are my everything and more, and without you, I might not be alive. I LOVE YOU!
In a list
A contest entry
- 10 options for the creative poet (2) by bananasfoster42.
700 points, ended November 9, 2007, 20 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Have you ever been in Love by Endeavor.
900 points, ended February 10, 2008, 29 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 38 of 38
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awh i like this one
you did a really good job
amazing write
thanks for entering and good luck! -
I really like this, great flow.
Only thing i picked up on was
"Though our hearts are torn into pieces.
But it cannot break us.
For we are strong together."
Im not sure whether its just me, or there shouldnt be a "but" in there. Cause if i was to read it as a sentence it would say "Though our hearts are torn into pieces, but it cannot break us, for we are strong together." Whereas you take out the 'but' and it reads ""Though our hearts are torn into pieces, it cannot break us, for we are strong together." Just seems to make more sense like that, but its your poem so obviously dont feel obliged to edit it or anything. But great work, and thanks for entering xx
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Well aren't you a wonderful friend?
I felt a strong connection to this poem, the emotion was sincere and I really enjoyed that.
-thank you for your entry -
This is really sweet I feel the same way with me and my bf..I am glad you found someone like this for you =) I hopy you guys stick through it all =) Good luck in everything..I especially liked the biggining of this poem,
"You are the one who carried me
When I thought that all hope was gone.
And in your troubled eyes, I see
The fire which has brought you so far.
We are broken and bound
Drawn to each other, yet torn apart.
It’s you and I against this world."
Awsome Write, Thank You for entering and Good Luck
*~ForeverLastingComa aka Leesha~* -
This is a great poem! I'm really glad you added the author's notes to this poem because I think that it adds more to the poem and the story behind it. I really like lines 3 and 4 because they have such great wording and it works really well. Also, I like how the title doesn't necessarily make it sound like a romantic poem, but yet it makes it sound really romantic at the same time. Great job and good luck in the contest!
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I really liked this piece as well though I think there were a few parts that could have flown about smothering in the wording but I love the feeling behind it. This piece was vary touching!
Great luck with this in the contest and future ones as well!
Great write!
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This is so beautifully written and I love the pic that is included. The words touched me very deeply and I am sure that he appreciates your friendship and now companionship. Good luck in the contest
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This is so touching,
very beautiful, a love poem from a tender
and caring heart.
It is clear as can be how much this person means to you.
I really enjoyed this piece a lot.
Good luck in the contest.
Loveandblessings2u & yours always
Joyce
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I LOVE this poem. It is so strong and thoughtful, and I love the imagery. Good job!
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Beautiful dedication. Love the wording of it. It made it sound like a wedding vow, which is beautiful and I loved reading this
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Superb. Written beautifully, a lot of people can relate to this.
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I know EXACTLY how this feels. So glad you have found someone like I have who is worth it ALL! Friends huh, they can turn to more very quickly!
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Excellent
When you cannot find your strength.
Lay your worries in my arms.
I will support you, stand your ground
I chose this for the care in the words
This is realy beautiful
Rick
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I have read your verse
Thank you so much for submitting your words to my contest
I will comment in detail on my final selections
I wish you well in the contest
Thank you
Rick
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This is true love in beautiful words
A great write!
Goodluck
~Lisa~
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this is so beautiful! thanks so much for entering this touching poem in my contest. best of luck
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Beauty in friendship, love in hearts that treasure friendships, form of strong emotions never will fade, very nice entry, thank you and good luck...MM
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The strength and bond between two people is an amazing thing and you penned it here so well
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this very beautiful and i loved it! congrats on the silver trophy! Good luck in the contest and have a happy new year!
~NineTailedFox -
This is also really good its gonna be hard...Good luck!
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Wonderful write, it takes two to make things work well and it seems you have that under control. Best of luck...Scott
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wow. this is such a beautiful, passionate write!!! for real, this poem rocks! thanks for entering
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This is a deep and complex write of emotion.
Strong emphasis on the reliance, the trust
that comes with knowing faithfully...the other
will never let you down; never leave you without
love and courage to overcome.
PS-I assume option 3? No notes -
Through fire and rain.
And I will hold you
When you cannot find your strength.
Lay your worries in my arms.
I will support you, stand your ground
When you feel you’ve lost your way.
So know that you are not alone
No matter what they say to you.
For I am here to hold and guide you.
You have found a friend in me
I can only say amazing..smiles..
Beautiful and tender write.true compassion..
Lovely..
Peace and best wishes with this entry..
~A~
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This is a really good peom... i have a question though... do you love this friend of yours? did something go so wrong that you two could only be friends? sorry... i know i said i only had one question... but the other kind of goes along with that one... anyways... it was a really good poem and i really enjoyed reading it.
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Thank you for your most beautiful and inspiring entry, which shows me even further that true friends and compassionates do exist out there,Josephine
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WOW
talkin about a true friend. your poem is awsome. i love it how u went from u needing the strength to caring for the other person in the poem. i mean u did it so gracefully that i could hardly tell that u did till i got to the end of the poem.
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congrats on the gold well deserved
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Wow this was a really sweet poem you have written for your friend. " will walk beside you Through fire and rain."Shows how much you care about him, and what all you will do to support him. Great job!
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really winner
im thinking how lovely tht friend is!!!!!!!!!!!!
its great
so calm and nice work
love it
keep flowing
by
the poet of hearts and beautiful words
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Strong, very strong. I could tell by the way you wrote this that you ment every word you said. Good job at portraying what you really felt.
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A beautiful poem of support for your friend, your words are bound to have helped him through his troubles.
Good luck in the contest..Sue
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Wow... this is exactly what i'm looking for! this is amazing, reminds me sooo much of the relationship i share with my friend molly... you should check out my poem entitled Molly actually... amazing write! thank you sooooo much!
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Aww. I really like this one. And I understand the feeling of loving, but being apart. I think thats what you were getting at right? Being in love with somebody, and that person loving you. But each of you have broken hearts and are afraid... I think. Lol. I probiablly got it very wrong. But I liked it anyway. Keep it up!
Megan -
Ooh, this is so sweet. I wouldn't say it's the best poem in the world, but you get so much emotion and love across--it's a really good write!
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Beautifully Passionate
I absolutely love this poem! It has great word choice and flows extremly well! I can feel the emotion flying off the page and into my heart! I love it! Good luck in the contest! :-)
--Cookie -
This is an incredible piece you've written for your friend. Very tender-hearted and true. Overall it was absolutely beautiful. It had a very Casablanca feel to it. Great, great work.
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AWESOME DEDICATION!!! I am a sucker for dedication poetry...lol..and this was an awesome write! Not too much wrong structurally either..the meter was a little rough..but who cares..the content was AWESOME!!! BRAVO!!!!!
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