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His Last Poem...

 

 

He has grown tired

of tracing her silhouette
through sheer ivory curtains
as she bows her head
in pastel whispers

of the shadow cast
when the moon hides
behind clouds of silver lining

He no longer wonders

when seas shall calm
as sails weather the storm

of rose colored thoughts
or dreams of any color
dancing in his head

He lives in gray
looking over his shoulder
draped in illusion
and when you look in his eyes,
there is only emptiness.

When the song is over
and the needle skips,
not even words
can make his heart flutter anymore;
He, who spoke of love
in utter fascination
who tasted kisses wild
in his multi-colored imagination.

He, who knew the soul
of a woman
undressing her ivory skin
in restless anticipation,

those ears inhaling sounds
of joyful jazz  
now, sleep in silence

Spinning his wheels
the carousel ride is over

as he writes his last poem.



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Comments

1 - 48 of 48

  • penman gold member
    May 30
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    Excellent

    Oh my what a great write. And so deserving of all the trophies. Congratulations


  • mysticstorm gold member
    October 14, 2008

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    This is very well done in flow and depth...truly beautiful and such lovely metaphor...a very amazing write all around...
    Best to you!
    mystic


  • Errant Panther gold member
    October 5, 2008

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    I agree with sunshinegirl, don't know how I ever missed this stunning piece.

    "He, who spoke of love
    in utter fascination
    who tasted kisses wild
    in his multi-colored imagination."

    These breathtaking lines blew me away,
    no wonder this has been crowned twice in gold.

    Wonderful imagery and delicate expression of love still flows from your pen as always.


  • Meej
    October 5, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is a beautiful poem with strong imagery and metaphor. It seems that the poem is about his lover dying and than at the very end you realise its his last memories as he sleeps away. It's almost like he's not even physically writing this poem but his memories form the poem. great work.


  • StarEyes
    July 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    How did I miss this one? This says a lot to me on many levels hon. I am sure you know what I am talking about too...

    WOW! hits close to home this morning.

    Congrats on the Golds!

    and love

    Nyetta


  • Viyanna Rosemarie silver member
    June 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    you just gave me chills with this write of yours. to read one's very last poem for the reasons you expressed in here is extremely heartbreaking and leaves the words etched upon the heart and mind of the reader. congratulations on the trophies you have earned with this fantastically written write. well done. thank you for sharing this with me tonight and i am looking forward to reading more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie

  • Virgoan
    November 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    "He lives in gray
    looking over his shoulder
    draped in illusion
    and when you look in his eyes,
    there is only emptiness."

    The personification and melancholy in this piece makes me take a pause for a few seconds. Beautiful write!

    Thanks for sharing.

    Virgoan


  • Naridill
    November 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Congrats on the two Golden shinys.. What a beautiful piece, the imagery is stunning, like the metaphors and simply this piece as a whole is so beautiful.

    Thanks for entering and much luck ~~~!


  • tara wilson gold member
    October 23, 2007

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    There really are no words in me, I am speechless and crying while reading this poem...this is excellent, so moving, meaningful and inspires me very, very much


  • Forgotten truth
    August 25, 2007

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    i see you won a gold for this,, a you really deserved it,, this was a really good poem,, one of the better ones iv read in a while,, you tell this story so well,, its so sad but deep down we all know this could be any one of us,, just because we love some one now,, doesnt mean we will in 20 years,, that when we need to chose to love them,,i think i will book mark this one,,

  • Nicole Hanna
    July 6, 2007

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    "he who knew the soul of a woman" is my favorite line in the piece. I'd love to see it as the ending in the poem, but definitely appreciated what you have here. Thank you for entering my contest. Poems like this are always a joy to read.


  • JustADutchie gold member
    June 23, 2007
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    Never got around to tell you how beautifully sad you're saying goodbye to a lost friend.


  • Dragons Lady
    June 2, 2007

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    Beautifully melancholy. Such vivid imagery. This is so wonderfully written it nearly made me want to cry at the sense of loss. I thank you for the explanation in your notes, it seemed to lend a better understanding to the poem. I love the last six lines. Well Done and congratulations on the gold trophies. They are well deserved.


  • lucy sky-diamond
    April 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is truly amazing, such lovely descriptions and imagery.
    of rose colored thoughts
    or dreams of any color
    dancing in his head
    what a great stanza. a wonderful write, and congratulations on your two gold trophies, you really deserved them
    lucy


    • poet2angels gold member
      April 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thank you so much for stopping by! I love your pen name...This poem was special to me....I am so happy that you liked it ...
      Lynda

  • FindingFate
    April 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is wonderful writing. You never cease to amaze me. I have learned so much from you, and through reading your beautiful words...I have grown.


  • Ryno
    April 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh wow ... this is just ... wow ... super. This is so splendid ... you have a great write here, my friend. It is amazingly inspiring and packed with everything. It is the package of a wonderful poem. Truly, a great job. Wonderful. Wonderful. Wonderful. Thank-you for entering Prewrites, best wishes, thanks for sharing.
    ~Ryan~


    • poet2angels gold member
      April 13, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      TY, Ryan!

      Such a lovely comment and I am so excited about this poem being recognized...TY again!!!

      Lynda


  • k cymbal
    April 1, 2007
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    I feel utterly grey after that! Amazing! I loved every melancholy word of it!


    • poet2angels gold member
      April 1, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      thank you!

      I don't normally write darker stuff, so that is a wonderful compliment!
      I do mostly love poems...

      Lynda


  • William Gray
    April 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    congratulations on the trophy, well deserved. Your poetry always inspires great emotion and, when read at the right times, helps very much with expressing my own. Always a pleasure to read your work, keep writting!
    ~Will


  • Whispered Devotions
    March 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Blown Away

    I am utterly captivated by every single line in this piece of art. It is a tragically beautiful masterpiece. I was not prepared for the stunning effect this had on me. I love how you used a lot of simplicity yet you used alot of metaphors and imagery as well... it was a perfect balance between the two and it moved me to no end. I know now why you have so mant trophies!


    Amy


    • poet2angels gold member
      March 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      aww ty

      This one was special to me and emotional...I thank you for your kind remark, Amy!

      Lynda


  • PerfectImperfection
    March 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Amazing!!! This is probably my new favorite from you. It is so emotional and well expressed - it just rolls so elequently down the page with a mastered flow. I really loved this. It just spoke to me. I am in one of those moods - and this just... hit me in the right spot. This stanza especially:

    "When the song is over
    and the needle skips,
    not even words
    can make his heart flutter anymore;
    He, who spoke of love
    in utter fascination
    who tasted kisses wild
    in his multi-colored imagination."

    Beautiful articulation, and poignant imagery from beginning to end!
    All my love
    Wendy

    [GOLD! Yippie!]


    • poet2angels gold member
      March 18, 2007

      Edit | Reply

      thanks, Wendy!

      This poem was different for me, and had a lot emotion tied into it.....TY for your great comment!!!
      Lynda


  • Ninth-Poet
    March 2, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Emotionally Grabbbing

    This is a poem of great revelation to which I felt compelled to hold my breath as my eyes read the descriptiveness and soft graceful elegance of this piece.This piece had me overwhelmed by the emotions as I had to let go a few tears from my eyes.

    -A great piece! and I can see why you won the contest!
    -Keep the ink flowing!
    -Dave


  • Lj-
    February 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Glad you were inspired because this is really good. I like the description and the details.

    I liked:

    "When the song is over
    and the needle skips,
    not even words
    can make his heart flutter anymore."


    thank you for entering,
    Best of luck!


  • Desire gold member
    February 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Whoa-

    Powerful verse You have penned on this color which I love along with a few others~
    Your descriptions bring the reader on the Journey with You~
    Dark can have a beauty all its own~
    Thank You for sharing Your Talent!

    Best wishes to You in the contest
    Many blessings too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


  • SmokinHotWhiteTiger
    February 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    I saw an entry written by sweet poetic Anna who write about the color of Black and now I just read your entry for the color of Grey. Your poem is full of beauty and a very touching hard color to write about. excellent poem all round my dear sweet poetic friend name Lynda. Keep up the Grrrrrreat work and best of luck in the contest to you as well. Sincerely, Paul

    • poet2angels gold member
      February 21, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      TY Paul

      Ty for your lovely comment , my dear friend
      Lynda


  • Jersene gold member
    February 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Brilliant penning...sad, heartfelt, and yet, so beautifully written. This certainly does fit with the colour, grey...good luck in the contest!

    • poet2angels gold member
      February 21, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      TY !

      YOU are so kind ! TY for your lovely and faithful comments, my friend!!

      Lynda


  • Sue Cardwell gold member
    February 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is a beautiful poem depicting the life of a poet no longer able to transfer his thoughts and feelings to paper.
    Good luck in the contest...Sue


    • poet2angels gold member
      February 21, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Ty, Sue

      Yes, it is very sad when someone loses the zest for not only writing, but life and when it is someone you were close to once, it is deeply sad....
      That is a very big fear! I could never make it without being able to express my thoughts in words...


  • JoyfulWriter
    February 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Such a beautiful piece, my friend! This color really captured the essence of the message of this piece. I always enjoy reading you. Keep up the great work! Smiles, terry


  • Heavenly Angel silver member
    February 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully sad poem this is, sweetie...
    Touching and so poignant
    Wish you the best in this contest, hon!


  • StarEyes
    February 21, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This is truly beautiful. I am wondering if I know the friend in which you speak of in these line. I think I may. It sounds like someone we both loved. But anyways, this is great. Best of luck in the contest. Keep that pen flowing.


    • poet2angels gold member
      February 21, 2007
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      TY sunshine

      No, it's not about our lion or anyone from AP.
      This is someone who is living but has lost the lustre, the color from life and has turned pessimistic and cold....which our lion could never do, he never lost the color and brought it with him to Heaven to share and sprinkle down upon us....

      *hug
      Lynda


  • Annalise
    February 21, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Ah.

    Which old friend?


    • poet2angels gold member
      February 21, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      LOL you know him well, Meli....Someone on "that old site I met you on" lol....If you read a certain person's last poem you will see where my poem came from..Reading his was very upsetting .....See if you can find it lol


  • kaibab silver member
    February 21, 2007

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    Just beautiful this one is angel poet...so moving and full of melancholy...I worried it was about me...as I am always afraid of my last poem,,,I know it will happen though,,,and if you wriye a poem about it make it as wonderful as this one,,,


    • Night Hope gold member
      February 21, 2007
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      "He no longer wonders

      when seas shall calm
      as sails weather the storm"

      Sighhh...What a mournfully beautiful poem, Lynda...Such inherent sadness throughout each line, it makes one weep upon reading each subtle tear that stains the page...I chuckled at Rich's comment, though; yeahhh, like his Muse will EVER leave him alone, even after his bones have turned to dust... Gorgeous & sorrowful, my Friend...I'm sorry you penned it so well, Lady... Wanda


      • poet2angels gold member
        February 21, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        yes, it was very sad when I read my old friend's poem on another site that we were both on. We haven't spoken for some time now, and I miss my friend...I still go to the site where we posted before I came here, and read his poems. The last poem I read was very upsetting, and inspired this...along with the contest with the color gray
        TY for your kind words, and yes, Rich will be giving us the gift of his words even from Heaven


    • poet2angels gold member
      February 21, 2007
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      no, Rich, you will be writing forever....and I can't see you ever losing the color from your life..It is all around you, and most of all it is in your heart...


  • Legend silver member
    February 21, 2007

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    Lynda I think you have covered the colour gray so well with this piece Such a sad condition when the poet loses all that coloured their lives.Almost like an artist who has become blind.How do they pursue all that is dear to them Great work again Good luck in this contest

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