He's deranged and demented,
He breaks bones for fun.
If you're not paying attention,
You might be the next one.
He lurks in the shadows,
When you go on a walk.
He stands beside you in the checkout line,
You may even talk.
He might be your neighbor,
Who peeks through the glass.
Or the guy walking behind you,
Checkin' out your ass.
You should be very careful,
When you go into your home.
Chances are pretty good,
You won't be alone.
He could be in the bathroom,
Or just behind the door.
In a matter of a few seconds,
He could have you on the floor.
He might be in a closet,
Or hiding beneath your bed.
He'll snap your bones like little twigs,
And leave you there for dead.
If the phone should ring don't answer it,
Just run for life,
Because he's right behind you,
With his razor sharp knife.
If by chance you run to slow,
And don't make it to the door,
They'll find you twisted and mangled,
Bloody and broken on the floor.
A contest entry
- PREWRITES!!!!!! by Luminescence.
450 points, ended March 5, 2008, 69 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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wow... ok. I was just about to log off and go to bed but now you have officaily creeped me out lol... jkjk
Great poem... I LOVED it. Welcome to the pre-lims because this was great.
Thank you for entering my contest.....
~Lumin -
niiiice. i like the rhyme and the creepy lurking thing to where it could just be anyone. reminds me of BTK... lol anywayz thanks for entering!
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!
Wow! This is friggin awesome! There's truth to this too because it CAN happen. Good write! I wish You The best of luck!
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Scary!!!
wow this makes me scared to go into my house!!! This is a great write. I mean I got chills reading it. I had to make sure no one was behind me while reading it. Great Job!!!
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=| i'm scared... this is very good, you are sooooo amazing at what you do! i'm jealous..i really am! hehe..good luck in the contest!
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:'(
*Cries*
This scares the hell outta me!!!!
You just wrote my worst fear!!
I demand a cute one.. a poem that'll make me stop crying.. jk.
This is good.. really good.. still though.. gives me goosebumps..lol
Lovely!
Angie <3 -
Wonderfully dark and intense
Bravo
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OMFG
THIS is just what I asked for... Now I'm going to have to check under the bed before I go to sleep... is he behind me now!!?? This is what nightmares are made of.
Thank you and good luck in the contest!
-K8
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Umm
Im never going to walk or go into my house or wait. I dont think i am going to be able to live the same now..geez thanks
Wonderful write though. Truly put chills down my spine! =/ Your rhyme is always perfect and as is the flow. Wonderful job here my friend and I truly hope you keep the pne flowing...
Emily
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