There are stars that shine far away,
but still they shine so bright,
there are stars shining in the night,
that shine on my heart each day.
There are ones I can reach out and touch,
and embrace when things get too much.
They shine away shadowing fears,
and are there to soothe painful tears.
There are stars shining up above,
some are close and some afar,
it doesn't matter where they are,
they shine a bright everlasting love.
There are stars shining out of sight,
they shine all day and shine all night,
shining bright when I can't see,
they shine a light of love on me.
They give our hearts a connection,
brightly shining loves reflection.
There are stars shining far away,
but still they shine so bright,
there are stars shining loves light,
an endless love that does always stay.
Author notes
Shadows-stars
A contest entry
- The Stars... by silent bee.
425 points, ended March 1, 2007, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Familiarity & Friendship by Touchof1der.
650 points, ended March 11, 2007, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - round 2, open to some by Elvenfairy.
300 points, ended June 2, 2007, 8 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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I like this
It make you think and want too go outside and look at the stars on your back
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tHIS WAS GREAT! Really, this was such an awsome poem. I feel just like you described every time I stand and gaze at the stars. They are beautiful and amazing things. Thanks for entering my contest!
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And may your life be filled with the beauty, grace and care of such stars! There was a lot of thoughtfulness within the words here. I did note one very minor nit...
In line six you have... when things get [to]... should be TOO... much
You did a wonderful job here. Thank you for taking the time and effort to enter my contest. Good luck!
♥ Touchof1der
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This i so beautiful, i LOVED it. the description and the image that this poem creates is so clear, and beautiful. thank you so much for entering it into the contest and best of luck to you!
~b*e*e~ -
Beautiful
I love stars. Your poem, twinkles and sparkles as strs do in the night sky. Twinkle, twinkle.
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Yes!! You have done this contest so much great and admirable justice that you simply just take my breath away with all of your amazing thoughts and how you have poured them onto my screen!!!
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Wonderful.
I love looking at the stars, and that is why I liked this poem. The only suggestion is; capitalize the first letter of all first words in each line.
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Awesome poem.
It flows so softly. I love the thoughts and pictures in my mind's eye.
"There are stars shining out of sight,
they shine all day and shine all night,
shining bright when I can't see,
they shine a light of love on me."
This has to be one of the most beautiful thoughts to imagine.
Thank you so much.
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wow, awesome. i had a similar idea of using stars for a metaphor, but mine's is actually kind of pessimistic. anyway, you expressed this metaphor that you used very well, using repetitions of some words to strong effect, giving vivid metaphoric images to the reader's mind. such a beautiful work deserves a gold trophy.
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this is agteat write, simply written and beautiful, straight from one heart to another. i liked the imagery i could see all of the stars twinkling in the night sky. thanks for sharing, and take care XxX
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thank you, you are very kind... peace and light always...
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Perfect color
I love it the color match the scenery I could see your imagery keep it up but the part that say "that shine on my heart every day" wouldn't you prefer to have said shine in my heart? -
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thank you for your comment, it is much appreciated.. sorry, I don't like the phrasing, in my heart, it means that love shines on me..
peace and light always..
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Ahh...so cute!
This one is sooo... lovely! I'm consumed by the brightness of the stars you have written of. It makes me feel overwhelmed with "loves light." I like how you wrote how the stars always shine, even when we can't see them, or even when they're far away. One thing that never quits on us: the stars! Ahhh...
*R
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Thank you so much, your wonderful comments shine a bright light on me..
peace, love and light always xx
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My first impression? Just wonderful!
I spend a great deal of time with the stars and find that your words reflect my heart!
It is a celebration of celestial comfort!
Bravo, sweet Poet!
Marianne -
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thank you very much, I truly appreciate the wonderful comment..
peace and light xx
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The first impression I have is what a friendly warm poem. After I read it through the threads of the repetition added a depth of love, not necesarily male female love. Your lines flow with much ease and the imagery fills the readers mind. You raise feel good emotions that sit so well and you can take with you through the day. Thank you or the pleasure. Good luck in the contest.
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Thank you
yes you are right, it is about a love between friends, and friends I have made on the internet, who live so far away, but yet the friendship does shine very brightly... like the stars, they shine through my day, during my friends night... thank you for the comment.. peace and light always xx
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Agreed, good job! I notice some alliteration and I love how there is a lot of esses and soft sounds that give it a nice smooth flow to your poem. I do though have a feeling that you may have left out some puncuation in a few spots? Perhaps not. It seems like it though like after:
"...get to much"
"...soothe painful tears"
"...everlasting love"
"...loves reflection"
- you would need to put a some periods.
I think that mostly because you don't CAP the beginning of every line only some and therefore I would assume you would place a period at the end of the line before the one that starts with a capital letter. I hope you understand what I mean and let me know if I am right or not in what I say, that is, if you would like to.
Well done. -
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Thank you
yes you are right, I usually just write, well rather type, and don't worry about puncuation until the end... that way I can just let the words flow... thank you for your kind comment. peace and light always.
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Good job with this one. I was impressed with it. Keep up the good work, Its nice to look upon the stars and wish for the very best.
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