in the dark and unforgiving night
when the world has lain to rest
i rise
i hunt alone
select my victims with breathless impatience
it has to be this way
feelings complicate, burden me
man, women or child
i jaunt in the shadows
i lay in wait
out of sight
it is safer this way
the thirst amplifies
blood, i crave blood
thirsty
so very thirsty
he warned me how it would be
i didnt listen
i just wanted the thrill
enchanted by eternal life
everlasting lust
the rush of a kill
the ignorant call me a killer
but they know nothing
its intoxicating
electrifying
entrancing
invigorating
they are lambs to my slaughter
no compassion no care
fools
select a sweet sacrifice
who will it be
i toy i contemplate
she comes into horizon
i desire her
hear her pulsating heart
i quiver, anticipate
lunge
i am upon her
she battles, she writhes
a vain attempt to save her futile being
she is but cattle
just a fix to me
i clasp her throat
she is powerless
limp
take her now
i bite
creamy, warm blood
my senses rush
i suck
feed greedily on her
blood cascades
it flows
i lap at it
saviour every last drop
to precious to waste
i am finished
i am done
she fades away
i have her now
her vigour her vitality her youth
she is mine
she becomes me
no remorse no shame
refreshed and content
this is the fact of life
no more no less
A contest entry
- vampires tale by dream5111.
300 points, ended February 22, 2007, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me your prewrites!!!!! by Nereida Nightshade.
450 points, ended February 19, 2007, 101 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Vampires and Blood! by okadadokie.
500 points, ended February 23, 2007, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - dark and sick poems by mylilpunchki.
400 points, ended February 25, 2007, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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wonderfully sensual
At first I was wondering how anyone could write a good poem about a vampire. But you did. I loved how it was completely sensual and filled with desire and hunger- totally a vampiristic (if that's a word) thing to do.
I love the line
"she becomes me"
It's funny, because I assumed it was a male vampire at first. But I went back and read it with the idea of it being a female: put a totally different twist on the poem :]
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ah, I love vampires. Thrilling write. well done
Skylar -
wow
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Good job with this one i haven't seen many vampire pieces so far in this contest. I really liked it though. Good job and keep up the good work.
Lindsay -
OH....I love vampires and this is a wonderful look into the world of a vampire. Very creative thanks for putting it in my contest it was a pleasure to read.
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thank you for the comment it is much appreciated, to show this i am going to read some of your works xx
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A very in depth poem. Sorta sounded like it could have been a vampire's journal. Very creative vocabulary. Great job. Good luck.
~Oka
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thank you very much for your comment
i did mean for it to be in thsi context but didn't know if i had succeed but you say that i have so i am pleased
i will return the favour and comment on one of your poems now xx
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"i hunt alone
select my victims with breathless impatience
it has to be this way
feelings complicate, burden me
man, women or child
i jaunt in the shadows
i lay in wait
out of sight
it is safer this way
the thirst amplifies
blood, i crave blood
thirsty
so very thirsty
he warned me how it would be
i didnt listen
i just wanted the thrill
enchanted by eternal life
everlasting lust
the rush of a kill" is my favorite part -
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thank you v much, much appreciated. i attempted to make it as dark as possible dont know if i have succeeded though.
could you elaborate?
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