Tired of carrying around all the faces
people know as you?
Two-faced isn't a compliment
even if it proves your capabilities of "adaptability."
Chameleon isn't the way you want to be described?
changing with every circumstance,
telling people what you think they want to hear --
it's exhausting, isn't it?
Wondering which lie will catch up to where you are now;
choosing which lie to believe can be a nice escape,
won't hurt one last time...
Are you tired of carrying all that around?
Think you're beyond redemption;
you'll never be enough;
worth only what someone says you are;
self-worth, valued so low
you're not sure if anyone will ever love you
for who you are without any embellishments?
At the core of who I am, I've said,
'If you really know me, you wouldn't like me anyway'
people pleasing, being so nice everybody likes me
going the extra mile most of the time
just to get that pat on the back, I don't feel I deserve.
Deep down I'm despairing and with borrowed confidence
I turn to the internet, that's why we love it so much, isn't it?
We can participate on an anonymous level and
present the avatar of our own choosing
being whoever we choose to be and only the discerning
can see through the veil, see the different faces...
Sometimes we've gotten so good at presenting the false one,
we believe that's who we really are and so deceive ourselves completely.
So, are you like me?
Tired of just surviving day to day,
frantically trying on what doesn't fit right in a frenetic frenzy
so burdened with many desires and high expectations --
the dreams that will never come true?
I lay them down, scattered upon the stage of my life,
deserted props no longer needed for an abadoned play
It is the confidence of the Lord Jesus who has allowed me
to lay aside the garments covering up my truest beauty,
the jewels and glitter distracting from genuine grace,
and here I stand again with one face, one mind, one soul,
fresh, clean, pure,
and ever so thankful for the persistence of the One
who makes my life possible
The Friend who has been closer than my twin brother
In my heart's deepest darkest moments,
He is still the Lover of my soul.
Author notes
In all of my searching, rationalizing, etc., I have never found peace of mind like I have when I surrender to the Presence of Him who made me.
A contest entry
- Behind The/My Mask by willowprincess.
525 points, ended March 2, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
the wonder of serenity...
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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i was captivated
I was captivated
More like a story unfolding before our eyes.
I am really pleased you have found peace of mind.
Keep putting pen to paper it is another great mind cleanser -
Well then, of the faces I've seen, I can't say I'd of guessed you to be religious. Kind of caught me off-guard there for a moment... Recollecting my thoughts..
Ah yes, I enjoyed the way you addressed your audience and spoke to them, it was very effective. By the time you mentioned the internet I was less inclined to think of this as "poetry" though, that's not to say that it isn't.
The "stage" of your life idea was interesting. Good job...
-Allura -
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I don't think this is poetry either - it really should be a column now that I've reread it. It didn't come out as I originally intended.
I'm actually not religious and in fact, religion was what turned me off to church and christianity because everything I knew about religion wasn't what I wanted.
Then I met some people who loved and accepted me for who I am and I watched them to see what it was all about. They are imperfect human beings just like me but they had something I didn't. They had peace, hope for the future to be better than it is today - maybe not for the world in general but one person at a time better just by helping and taking care of each other.
I rolled my eyes when I heard them talk about Jesus and the Bible - i'd heard it all before but something happened over time and getting to know them. They offerred me comfort and caring I'd never before received and all without expecting anything in return.
I know our conversations in the past have been "interesting" to say the least but that stage of my life is done. I do enjoy our convos though and hope we can continue. I'll be by to peruse more of your work later. -
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Yeh, I know what you mean there. Most of the stuff I've written lately have turned into rants about various things... Blech.
I see... I believe what is talked about in the Bible, and Jesus' teachings, but I cannot say I follow it. Until I move out of the hell-hole I'm in now, I don't believe I can progress spiritually, so all that is rather on hold. (Terrible, I know, haha.)
I've heard and seen too much, too many times, and I've not yet found many truly sincere "Christians." Until I find an actual group of people, not just one couple or something, I probably won't fully accept it either.
I'd love to continue talking to you as well. Maybe you'll tell me how you're getting past that "stage" as me and my man are trying to get at least somewhat straightened up, getting life together finally kinda thing.
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this is so very true. it is only by complete surrender and trust that we can have that peace. it is only then that we can dare reveal our faces. you are so to the point with this write. i love that about it. good job, and good luck.
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A write that is so honest and straight talking most people should be able to relate, I can for one !!
Sometimes noone knows the real us, the person we are underneath all the clothes, the smiles, the attitude.. the person we are when we are at our most vunerable.
I loved this piece as it is thought provoking and well written.
As always my friend indeed a pleasure to read...julie
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thanks for entering my contest, your poem's great, but unfortunately it doesn't follow the rules. it needs to have the title 'Behind the/my mask'. you can either change the title, or enter a new poem. thanks
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oops! sorry - i wonderred about that. - added the title change. thanks fo rgive me a chance.
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no problem. thanks
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