I once knew a daisy now withered and worn
she was the loveliest of dasies from the day she was born.
Her petals were beautiful and velvety soft
yet she grew isolated on a hill near a loft.
She posessed no companions, no fortune or fame
not a friend did she have that she could proclaim
There was nothing but dust and the warm musky air
and below the soft mound a soul reside there.
She was the saddest of dasies so tender and mild
and resting beneath her was her own precious child.
And as she stood solemnly withering away on that hill
her petals fell gently to the earth with a chill.
One by one they lay scattered from the wind and the rain
til there was nothing to cling to but her own lasting pain.
yet though she sat stoically not all hope is gone
for she sank to the earth awaiting the spring to be born.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Nice rhymes, none of them are fake and its very suttle which is how it should be with poetry. I like the view on a daisy, i can see why its one of your personal favourites!Lovely write, i think you should enter it in a contest or two, more than cabable of winning you a trophy. Up to you.
Wonderful write I enjoyed reading this so keep it up!
Dryad Enya -
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This piece is surely a sad one my dear precious sissy..How I miss you, and though so sad, as usual, you pen so beautiful. Well expressed, and hit the point home perfectly. Keep on letting the ink flow, much love and rainbows. Peace, Bro Timothy~ xo
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This is very lovely! It is sad but yet ends with a slightly hopeful tune... I really like it. Good job and best of luck in the contest!
Carrie -
oh,how lovely this is and how lovely was that daisy.she awaits her rebirth in the springtime.this is such a tender write.it shows that oh so lovely side of you.i really like this a lot.my best to you in the contest.
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A Diamond, even sad sparkles when diamonds are involved. Thank you.
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Wattle
You are much to kind Wattle and I read your teasers and I feel that you should continue to write them to be an inspiration to others. Avril
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Very lyrical, an inspired internal rhythm and energy carry the poem wonderfully for me. As far as the image goes, this is a brilliant interpretation and a loving tribute for your Aunt. What a perfect way to honor her memory. Blessings and best wishes, ~richard
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this was really good. I'm gald you found inspirtation for a great poem in my contest! good luck!
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OnlyInMyDreams
Thank you, I thought about my own auny Daisy when I first read your contest. It inspired me to write this poem. Auny Daisy passed on more than twenty years ago. Avril
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