"When we laugh indoors the blissful tones
b o u n c e off the walls
and f
a
l
l to the ground."
You whispered 'Pick Them Up For Me Sweetheart.'
♥s&&Xs dripping off your words
but "i breed thicker skin and let my lustrous coat fill in."
&&you'll whisper
'"I love you Guinevere,
I love you Guinevere,
I love you Guinevere,
I love you."'
&& i'll trust you
for now.
just until "december's chill comes late".
the days get longer, skies get darker.
ironic, really. when you were the one lying, that i should find myself months && months later in that same room with you.
"there's piles on the floor of artifacts from dresser drawers that I'll help you pack."
&& just as you're leaving, walking down the pathway, you whisper:
'"I loved you Guinevere,
I loved you Guinevere,
I loved you."'
Author notes
Song - 'We Laugh Indoors' - Death Cab For Cutie.
A contest entry
- && dir.r.ty.pretty.girls by Crash Into Me.
735 points, ended March 9, 2007, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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"ironic, really. when you were the one lying, that i should find myself months && months later in that same room with you."
Aww I love that part.
Great job hun;; good luck in the contest<333
♥
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Thankyarr sweets.
LoveLoveLove
Noise&&Kisses
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Wow...even the work Death Cab inspires is amazing xD This is probably the best thing I've read from you so far although you never fail to amaze me. Stunning...just absolutely stunning. Good luck in the contest (notthatyouneedit) ♥♥!!
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Hah. I need it, trust me. I reareareally need as much luck as I can get. I'm not winning any other way.
Noise&&Kisses
ps/Death Cab = ♥♥
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guinevere and lancelot *sighs* authurian legend, i love how legends come into play with poetry and makes it so prettyfull, but you dont need legends darling, your poetry is amazing!
i can get the mood by the emphesis that you place on the quotes of "i loved you guinevere" i get the feel that the girl is out of reach and somewhere beyond reality and the boy is heartbroken.
youll kick ass in this contest!
♥
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Aw, thanks sweets. And thanks muchly for the good wishes. I hope I do good. It's about time I did good at something.
Noise&&Kisses
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I'm not sure if the quotations are yours or parts of the song you mentioned (I'm not familiar with it) but I liked this entire thing.
"&&you'll whisper... - ...&& i'll trust you
for now."
--the repetition was used excellently and I like your "for now" ... yes, so often we claim that.
"when you were the one lying, that i should find myself months && months later in that same room with you"
--to catch up with a familiar face ... it's scary sometimes.
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Gladyarr liked it sweets. Thanks for the comment!
Noise&&Kisses
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lovelovelove it.
like i lovelovelove you.
♥
muah! i can't wait to marry you!
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LoveLoveLoveyarr forever, sweetie.
Noise&&Kisses
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p.s.
i love this song =] -
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It's So Damn PrePrePretty, isn't it?
Noise&&Kisses
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dirty pretty dolly indeeedy!
rumplestilskin says he loves you too...
i dig guys with beards, how 'bout you?
best of the best in the contest, my sweet.
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Guys with beards tickle.
Thanks for your comment.
Noise&&Kisses
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this was beautiful, hunny
ise proud of you, lol.
ilyily. =]
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Glad someone's proud of me, sweets.
Noise&&Kisses
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gor-ge-ous. i loved this poem to pieces. hmm. you never really do fail to impress. stunning flow doll. beautiful-dirty-and everything that's in between. my favourite lines were.
"♥s&&Xs dripping off your words"
OH-SO pretty. i imagine it as someone speaking of all their love for someone-yet it's all covered in lies. amazing write. good luck in the contest love. hope you place! *autumn* -
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Glad you liked it sweets. I hope I place too. Fingers&&Toes&&EveryThingInBetween Crossed!
Noise&&Kisses
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oOoOo dolly..
"&& i'll trust you
for now."
you can never trust me sugarcake..
sweet the core and poisonous at that.
oOoOo baby doll. i (love.love)
good luck in the contest sugarcake
-alexsis
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Gladyarr LikeLikeLiked. Awesome contest.
Noise&&Kisses
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