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Devotion

Giving everything, and all
Laying down the lifeline
Everything goes on hold

 

Opening up a new page
History now begins
How will the book finish

 

Heart pounds
Heat rises
Feeling unworthy
Yet blessed

 

Is this real
Or is this a dream

 

Please let this continue
I can't afford for it to stop

 

I will give my everything
If you continue like you're doing

 

Don't leave, please stay
I need your hand

 

Without you
I'm nothing

 

With you
Each day shines

Author notes

Background Thanks to Maatkara

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Comments

1 - 46 of 46

  • MysticAngelEyes
    March 23, 2007
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    Wow you express your feelings so beautifuly, your words flow together so well. very nicely done.


  • Fairy Nutty Buddy silver member
    February 24, 2007

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    You are worthy! Lovely poem of enjoying the good in life, yet worrying about losing what you have found. MommaNut


  • Maatkara gold member
    February 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is a beautifully expressed and heartfelt poem, Kari You deserve the best, and sure to receive it.

    I doubt anyone who could inspire your devotion would be going anywhere.. but don't ever think you're nothing without them. You could never be 'nothing', dear heart


    • Kari gold member
      February 22, 2007
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      Aw, thank you ... I guess I still have a long way to cross before I get there


  • Sock
    February 21, 2007
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    Wow

    This is great. Jam packed with emotion, straight to the point, a very beautiful piece.


  • seraphim shock
    February 20, 2007
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    powerfully penned words Mom. Good work!
    Blessed be
    Lizzy


  • wings of an angel
    February 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    kari this is a very sad and emotional piece you penned here, I hope everything is ok with you, I can feel the emotion as I was reading this well done dear poet


  • poetryality silver member
    February 20, 2007

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    Usually I am not a fan of repeated words (everything) but in this instance the word seems to empower the poem. I feel the intensity in your words. There is the need for this person to be there, to "stay". I know these feelings. I would dissolve if the love of my life ever left me. A very moving work poet.


    Much Love ♥

    Renee


    • Kari gold member
      February 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much Renee. Do you know..I didn't even notice the repeat of words the poem just happened in the matter of moments lol. 's


  • AnnD Moderators member
    February 20, 2007
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    A most beautifully worded post, full of genuine feelings and emotion.
    Well done Kari.
    Ann


    • Kari gold member
      February 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Ann,
      Thank you so much for your kind compliment. I have not wrote something like this in awhile and the feelings are indeed very genuine.

  • naobi
    February 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    naobi

    your this poem is so nice,i also like your poems,you are a good poet.try it as much as you can for next poems, thank you!

    • Kari gold member
      February 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your nice comment


  • Koenigsreich
    February 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    powerful emotions are displayed with few words...i truly evy your talent. Keep writing Momma K!

    • Kari gold member
      February 19, 2007
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      Aw, blushing. Thank you sweety

  • mssonah
    February 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    cool, i like it!....sona


  • Claudia Incognito
    February 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    ^^

    Purdy kari, purdy. theres no puncuation, I just realized that...o.O without pie, each day is odd. ^^ tehehe


    • Kari gold member
      February 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Nope..I hardly ever use puncuation..it makes the poem much neater I am glad you liked it


  • Lady Altheia gold member
    February 19, 2007

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    Wow this is a beautiful piece of devotion and you sound very devoted here. The words painted beautiful images.

    • Kari gold member
      February 19, 2007
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      I am glad the words gave you beautiful images. Thanks for your compliment


  • xXxThat GurlxXx
    February 19, 2007

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    Good

    -Kamala-Kari-
    Hey! I thought that this was a really good write. I like how you had it all flowing together so well. Keep on writing, you'll only get better!
    ~!~Manda~!~

    • Kari gold member
      February 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your wonderful compliment...I am glad you liked it


  • freespirit51
    February 19, 2007

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    Outstanding piece my dear friend. You have penned a winner of a poem. The emotions and love flow from your exquisite words. Keep these masterpieces flowing.


  • Erotik Rose silver member
    February 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I like this one very much, I think you did a great job with this poem> A little bit of faith that we all like for.



    Liz

    • Kari gold member
      February 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      's Thank you so much. I am glad you liked it


  • catz Moderators member
    February 19, 2007

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    This is very nice, Kari, very emotional. Your words here exemplify the feelings we can have for someone who we care so deeply about, who is always there for us.

    "With you
    Each day shines"

    I especialy love that part

    Good job, Hon.
    love and
    Granna


    • Kari gold member
      February 19, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      's Granna..thank u so much for your sweet comment. I really appreciated it and needed it


  • Fire N Ice
    February 18, 2007

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    Fantastic

    This is great work Kari,
    its wonderful to have that one thing,
    that one person who holds us up or stands by us through the hard times,
    comforts us when we cry, and is always there to share our laughter,
    love is beautiful,
    and this write does it justice,
    well done

    • Kari gold member
      February 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you very much for your words. I appreciate them. I am glad you liked it


  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    February 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I would change the one line to "heat rises" not "arises" other than that, this is very well done Kari. It has alot of emotion, a lot of pleading. Hmm, seek within self...it will sustain all

    • Kari gold member
      February 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your comment...I have changed that Yeah...it will


  • Applehead
    February 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Your words are so true, the feeling you get when loving someone

    "Heart pounds
    Heat arises
    Feeling unworthy
    Yet blessed "

    you hit the nail on the head here, puttin the person you love up high

    "Opening up a new page
    History now begins
    How will the book finish"

    This is great, I especially like the second line

    No more words need to be said about the title it speaks for itself. Excellent well done hun


  • leander Moderators member
    February 18, 2007

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    Awe hunny
    What a very beautiful poem you have written here, radiating tenderness and sweet feelings throughout each letter great job!


  • slipperssun gold member
    February 18, 2007

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    this is so beautiful.... i hope your feeling better..this is from your heart and it shows to us all... fantastic write well done


    • Kari gold member
      February 18, 2007
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      Thanks I have my off and on days. I appreciate your comment...yes it is for sure from the heart


  • The Poetic Angel
    February 18, 2007

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    wonderful poem Kari pure Devotion ...great to have you back hope all is well now ...good luck in the contest ... cheeky xxxxxxxxxx

    • Kari gold member
      February 18, 2007
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      Thank you for the welcome back I appreciate your comment


  • Bedroom Eyes
    February 18, 2007

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    this is a really sweet poem Kari. I like this best:

    "Is this real
    Or is this a dream"

    when it's real, it seems to be a dream come true. So, if you have to ask yourself if it's a dream...then it's most definately real

    a very lucky person this was written for...to have your devotion is an awesome thing. very nicely done, and once again...welcome home


    • Kari gold member
      February 18, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much hun. I am really glad that you liked it and it feels sooo good to be back home

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