Once, when everything was blooming
under domed hydroponics’ heaven
I wrote poems I put under glass
Purple passions leaned dryly
against hard board brace
so fragile, a fall off the wall
could pulverize it
I prefer everything blooming
where dance is done
by whimsical breeze
winding like a transparent veil
through my daughter’s hair
flowers are deaf to wails
they simply loosen their curl
cracked lipped survivors
are no use in a frame
I cut my fingers on her pain
once she took on
scent of sorrow
and loss etched her face
In a list
A contest entry
- 48hours: dull placebos in a jar by marrow.
300 points, ended February 19, 2007, 9 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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"I cut my fingers on her pain
once she took on
scent of sorrow
and loss etched her face"
Immaculate, my Friend...Unique & wise...
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whenever anyone says "Unique" I know I met my own challenge...lol... ty gf for keeping me from the creative curb.
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"flowers are deaf to wails
they simply loosen their curl"
ahh..these lines struck a chord within. And i hate to sound redundant, my friend, but this is simply..
beautiful.
wow.
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ty, Rowan. sometimes I capture such an image of thigns and they so relate to somethig real going on in my life. I do appreciate you stopping by.
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Excellent
I simply loved this piece as I let it run within me. Wonderful entry. Wonderful verse. You are such an amazing writer, as this piece again proves. Just WOW. ~Pam
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ty pamela. My soulsister raises orchids. She then paints them. She is very O'Keefe and her larger than lfie pices are simple incredible. Her anger and empowerment are raw on her canvases. I hope, one day to write that empowerment into poems.
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what an amazing writer, you are. i remember reading your work from time to time under different names, and i must say that i have always been impressed by you. come to think of it, i believe you placed in a contest or two of mine before, a couple years back. you've definitely a beautiful skill, and i greatly enjoy reading it. you are such a keeper.
thank you again for entering, and may you have a great day and the best of luck in the judging of my contest.
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thank you binosaur. I am so glad we got that settled..I thought I had half-timers. *grins*
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all my pleasure.
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Whimsical
Nicely done, Carol. A pleasant flow and beautifully painted words. I just love the line
'I prefer everything blooming
where dance is done
by whimsical breeze'
I couldn't agree more. ~~~James
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thank you, James. I wanted it to read like a dance..perhaps it did.
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