The moment she said hello
Her voice became the one I hear in my head
Echoing passionately even now
Sound took on the living form
Of sparkling eyes and soft smile
Understanding all my fears and still
Not letting me fall victim to them
Draping me in love’s golden light
Of sparkling eyes and soft smile
Fervently, she fills my soul
Her voice became the one I hear in my head
Echoing passionately even now
Reaching the deepest recesses within
Voice of my conscience reminds me
Of sparkling eyes and soft smile
I will ever be yours
Clinging to that first hello
Echoing passionately even now
Author notes
Sorry about the lack of rhyme. I don't do rhyme well, but wanted to try the form you've chosen. Thanks for the inspiration!
This is a specialized form of an acrostic. The contest holder came up with it and I found it quite intriguing. I did take it one step further by starting each stanza with the stanza's acrostic. Check out the contest for the specifics.
A contest entry
- The Contest Which Must Not Be Named by Orual.
700 points, ended February 22, 2007, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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The depths of passion are remarkable in this piece..
I adore it..
thank you for sharing
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Well Met
You enthrall my senses with each read, and for one who has long been for a good read, this beautiful sentiment makes my day. Thank you for lifting my world weary soul. And btw, I am now ready and excited to recieve more poems over our private connection on the email channels of the world wide web.
Send on BrightPoet.
~kar
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The picture of Arwen and Aragorn adds a nice depth to the poem. I really like your word usage and the imagery. I do wish it had some rhyme pattern, but I know that some people find that very difficult. Good work on this, I hope you stretched yourself, and thanks for entering.
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The firebird speaks...
He listens, and she is the sum of her voice
In all things she speaks, she is the sum of her voice
In dense woods, the quiet makes soundless her mouth
The dew on the leaves becomes her voice
The taste of her kiss is sweet honey on his tongue
The wisdom of two hearts escapes from her voice
The phoenix stirrs, from the tree's frosted limbs
In his songs, he finds the purest hum of her voice
The wind stills, and cecalm the waves on the sea
The day grows cold, the world is numbed by her voice
The tear-filled eyes of red fox are drawn to her
Soulful, enchanted eyes make dumb her voice
Cascading notes, sliding tones, soft words of love
A melody - or all who hear succumb to her voice
Ikotane vanima...
Linnon am meleth vîn, mel amin.
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pretty
This is very pretty and simple in its touching message. I loved the words, but I felt that it lacked rhythm in many places. It didn't flow quite as well as your poems usually do but it was still an amazing write. I like the pic you chose to go with it too... it was fitting.
Glad to see you writing so much again and I look forward to reading more from you!
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This is one incredible acrostic, my dear friend. It flows so beautifully, and your words are elegant and loving. Good luck in the contest, my friend, as if you'd need it. Hugs, Patricia
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Jim,
This new form is interesting, reading your poem makes me wonder about what the form is! I love the picture at the top. Lord Of the Rings is awesome baby!
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pretty
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I don't know what the contest called for, but this is simply breathtaking. The acrostic effect that matches the title as well is quite creative and unique. It's interesting what one can come up with from the ideas or form of another's creation. I think what you have here is simply wonderful. Good luck in the contest.
♥ Touchof1der
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