Some people are truly happy inside and out.
Me I'm happy when i want to be.
I fake it plain and simple.
Most people can't begin to comprehend
the thoughts running through my head,
memories of a painful past,
and so lost on what kind of future i should grasp.
my brain is in constant turmoil,
no wonder i cant laugh.
I have created a monster within myself,
I am my only enemy.
If only i could make me see,
that true happiness is meant for me.
I don't have to be fake all the time,
if only i would let go of what has control over my mind.
But so far no good,
my friends will continue to not know the real me,
all they will see is my false happy.
Author notes
Your Victim
A contest entry
- I'm leaving... by Aeonna.
450 points, ended February 16, 2007, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ***Similar but still different*** I want a poem about YOU by Naridill.
605 points, ended March 18, 2007, 23 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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"memories of a painful past,
and so lost on what kind of future i should grasp.
my brain is in constant turmoil,
no wonder i cant laugh. "
These lines were really strong for me, they stood out alot. And although I like the poem altogether, I feel it could have been stronger if the first line or last line was a real biter. I feel you could've made a big wow.
But nonetheless. I like this poem and you have a natural talent.
Thank you for entering and Good luck
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I don't think its just you who fakes being happy. I think its something we can all relate to... I know I've faked many, many times in my life of being happen when I'm not really at all. So just know you aren't alone in your feelings. One thing about this "poem" is that you have three lines and then like a paragraph which really doesn't follow any poetic form. Just a thought. Thanks for sharing!
Welcome to AllPoetry!
--Tim
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Thanks 4 the advice as you can see I fixed up the lines.
~Bliss
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