pull
at the heartstrings
there's nothing left to tug
'cept the thread
holding my skin together
stare
focus on my eyes
until your eyes become clear
see the emptiness I draw
and describe
( my burial will be etched into the mind of a young girl )
hold
my calloused hand
instant cold wraps you
it's the only feeling
I can produce
your hand can wipe away the makeup
that has become a tattoo
each layer you take off a new one
develops
my skull is painted
( my burial will be burned into the memory of a young girl )
where
will my sadness reside
if you
open my mask...
pull
at my heartstrings
there's nothing left to tug
'cept these threads
holding my skin together
Author notes
Option #1, photo inspired.
Rest in love, Brandon Lee.
A contest entry
- The Crow by February Moon.
600 points, ended March 13, 2007, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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"hold
my calloused hand
instant cold wraps you
it's the only feeling
I can produce"
If I were to have commented on this yesterday, that probably wouldn't have been my favorite part, but it is now. It kinda matches my mood.
I like the repitition parts too.
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(Burned into the memory of a young girl)
The repeat burned it into my memory.
I love it. X
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!!!
tee hee
you just keep getting better and better!
oooh this made my eyes dazzle! fav part ever:
"your hand can wipe away the makeup
that has become a tattoo
each layer you take off a new one
develops
my skull is painted
( my burial will be burned into the memory of a young girl )"
i got too many versions from this, and in a way it confuses me BUT in a good way. i'd like to knwo what it means to you. honestly i just am in love with the layer of makeup being a tattoo. that was genius, && the skull being painted. damn i couldnt ever think of that.. just beautiful my dear beautiful.
♥
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I see Eric (the Crow) as a tortured being, because he is. His makeup saddens me as well ... I just tried to put myself in his mind. Thanks for reading (again).
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This poem is wonderful. You did a great job. The emotion is raw and real. Best of luck in my contest.
Chelsea
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