On my own again
This time I'll take a new road
I won't ever stop
Until I find a dead end
If I stay
I don't think I'll be able to forgive
If I stay
I don't know how I'll live
I rather be alone
Then to go through another mistake
I rather be alone
Then to feel your hate
On my own again
Thinking about the things I want to forget
They say they fade away
But not in my memory
Forgive & Forget
Smile & Pretend
I rather be alone
Then to do that all over again.
If I stay
I'll never be able to forget
If I stay
I'll spill all my secrets
I rather be alone
Then to see you everyday
I rather be alone
Then to have you stare at me in that way.
On my own again
Waiting for a new lesson to be learned
Taking this new road
Hoping the past will be burned
I can make it on my own
I don't want you near
I hate you
I hope you disappeer
I rather be alone
Then to stay
I rather be on my own
Then to go through this mistake.
A contest entry
- †Titles!† by DarlingUnwrapMexx.
300 points, ended February 17, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ~ Cherished Prewrites ~ by Sunkissed xo.
1000 points, ended November 15, 2008, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PRWRITE CONTEST FOR ALL by serenity silvermoon.
900 points, ended August 2, 1023 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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a very compelling write here. you have expressed your feelings well and with emotion. your tone is honest and the whole thing has a nice smooth flow to it. well done! thanks for entering the contest, and best of luck in it
peace ♥ -
I think this is an amazing poem and i think you have great potential as a poet. Two things though: you spelt disappear wrong (fourth line of the nineth paragragh) so i suggest you use the 'spell checker' next time. and the other thing is that the third paragraph sounds forced, i suggest adding a word in before hate (something so descibe the type of hate- binding, daily, ect.) So anyways I love the poem, and I think you did a great job!
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wow
I can feel the emotion in your writing, and its very good. The 4th and 8th stanza are very well written. It sometimes hurts to think about things that happen in the past, but in order to project forward in the new road, we must remember our past so we don't follow our same footsteps. Learn from our mistakes.
great write keep it up
~Sum_mer.zac -
That was something very good.I really appreciate the 4th and 7th stanza they are mavellous !!Good Job ! Best of luck 4 the contest !
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A good write, it is packed with deep meaning...it really made me think. Just one criticism though - it seemed to be quite objective until "I hate you/I hope you disappear", which comes as a bit of a shock to the reader because it contrasts so much in style to the rest.
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This is a good poem. I like the emotion of this piece. Disapear is mispelled. The beginning made me think of that song "On the Road Again". But in a good way. It cheered me up a little.
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cool write. good luck
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I really like how you wrote this. You have a lot of talent. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck!
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