In this world, real and pretend
Are set out in black and white.
So tell me, what does one do
When the two decide to fight?
In this all-consuming conflict,
How should I find my voice?
And what do I say, black or white,
When gray is not a choice?
I don't need your voice,
Just a little help with mine.
There is no need to speak aloud;
I'd settle for a sign.
I don't ask for claims of love
As I'm not ready for pure pretend.
I ask you assign me black or white.
Smile. Push 'send.'
Author notes
I wrote this along time ago to show how what you think is true and the truth are very hard to distinguish.
A contest entry
- Black and white....................... by Starswhispers.
500 points, ended February 15, 2007, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I know we've all been here at some point or another care to share with me? by Beverlynohime.
450 points, ended January 27, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Is the rhythm too far off to really pay attention to the message?
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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I love this idea! Yeah I feel this same way too. We all have these thoughts to go through. what a wonderful poem! Thank you for sharing!
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I like the idea, too
I thought most people could relate to this, and that's important in a poem.
Thank you.
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i LOVED it....it flowed great as i read it. this was a great poem. and just reading i could get a little picture in my head and that's what i like to get when i read something worth my time. great job again and please return the favor and good luck in the contest. you should win this is great!!!!!!!!!!!
~Dani~
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'LOVE', that means something
This is one of the older ones, and I think I have harder time with flow now. I usually have a good time with imagery, and since this only called for black and white, I'm glad I didn't overcomplicate it. I will return the favor.
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Was it easy to make the rhymes? You seem to have perfect words chosen for what you're trying to say.
Talking to someone is so much harder than sending an email... but it means more.
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You haven't an idea, I'm sure
I'm enormously pleased that you find the words sufficient; word usage is often one of my strong points, but flow is very difficult for me, so for you to commend the words I have chosen means very much to me.
Yes, I agree that speaking is much harder and significant, but sometimes contact is vital when speech is unreachable. The things we'll do, huh?
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hmmm... Besides black being the color of text, white being the color of a typical background, and "send" referring to the send button in an e-mail app, I don't really get what this has to do with e-mail.
However, it is pretty good at setting up a conflict between two things...flow's a little off
but still nice poem
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My God, Thank You
I'm glad you wrote what you felt, not just the stuff you could make up.
I know it's not obvious, but the poem was supposed to be a request of response, but since the main character has no voice, email is a last-resort.
Yes, the flow is always off >.< But thank you, once again, for your honesty. I means more to me for you to say so than to just say nice things that mean nothing.
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This piece really is interesting, but I thought that it was very deep and I liked it.
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Thank you
Depth is always a good thing. Thank you for your faithful comments, they are not soon forgotten.
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This is really interesting and with a deep meaning. I love the idea and the presentation. Nice work.
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Thank you
The presentation . . . never really get comments on the beginning. It's the end I tend to focus on. Thank you, it means a lot.
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This is quite different very insidious thoughts can come out of it, i like the idea and the end is well brought about and very strong. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck.
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No problem
It was a wonderful idea for a contest. I'm pretty sure I didn't make any placing, but that's ok, I'm glad you take a personal interest in all the poetry. I appreciate this more than you know or I am willing to express.
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you know this is a little bit of a werid poem but yet it makes a lot of sense if you really think about it, keep it flowing
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Much Appreciated
Flow is something that often alludes me _-_ Thank you for the critism; I am always trying new kinds of imagery and rhythm, so don't be afraid to tell me it's weird; I know it is, I just need confirmation.
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Wonderful Write!!
a very interesting write, definetly in for the thought. Black or white, what i think you are looking for are the elusive shades of grey love. keep it up!! you are a very talented writer!
^+_+^
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Sry about the splg errors; my compie's wacky 2day
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Thank you for the feedback
Yes, this poem was aminly based on a stream of consciousness. The original story was about a girl who couldn't tell whether this boy still loved her or not. There was a lot of imagery about black and white (especially gry), so this is what my twisted consciousness spit out. Hoope you enjoyed it.
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