Rain pelts us
caught by surprise
we laugh and stomp in puddles
her hair is stringy
but sticks to her face so beautiful
he tilts back his head
to receive the precious gift from the sky
clothes hang in folds
as we dance against the dark sky
trees lash in the wind
her skirt blows in its fury
holding hands
they stop and stare
caught by some vision in each other's eyes
we hold hands
unaware of the crying clouds
he leans in
she leans up
inspired by some unearthly passion
they meet halfway
and stand
drenched in heaven's tears
gently held together
and bound by the water streaming down our cheeks
heaven sees the future
and it mourns
dark cloud on the horizon
as he trudges away
she remembers the kiss in the rain
after all these years
heaven mourned
Author notes
This is a flashback from multiple perspectives on a first kiss in the rain. It's written from a time after the break-up of the couple. Sorry, this was the best I could do at short notice .
A contest entry
- Double Kudo's Invites Only by Ladybug.
500 points, ended February 15, 2007, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
mourning in tears of a beautiful love
-
A really good poem, a wonderful atmospheric recall of that first kiss, great job. sj
-
Atmospheric
At short notice this is great, or if it'd been at long notice. Yes very atmospheric, I could almost feel the wind blowing under the duvet (noooooo not that kind of wind!!!).
Love, light & peace
Georgia
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wow-unexpected topic-let me just say that.
I like it a lot-very beautiful-
keep it up!
pegleg
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