Must love be like an arrow,
Pointing through the charming sky?
The light of which is guilty,
But innocent to the eye.
A contest entry
- The Broken R! by Ms Raneika.
600 points, ended March 9, 2007, 88 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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i like it=] it like words to a sore soul. well...maybe. i like it though and the rhyme is good.
xoxox i like it -
nice
intersting innocence seeing guilt,
should love ever carry guilt?
i liked this short but poinant questing,
love flys as does and arrow but it is not a random flight and never falls to rndom targets.
love flys seeking the one it needs, the heart that will complete it,
love is free
i loved this short and wonderful poem
thank you for these words.
. Rewarded 6
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adorable
just adorable...a very swt poem that says alot in its few words...good and to the point -
very short but descriptive thanks for entering my contest much love, Raneika
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nice job
well it was good butt it was really short. so next time u make a poem as good as this one make sure its longer XD
. Rewarded 4
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I appreciate short poems spilling with meaning moreso than longer poems with one message.
This was quite thought provoking and the language was quite whismical.
Thanks for sharing.
. Rewarded 4
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This is a short poem but holds a lot of meaning. Cupid's arrow is sometimes a blessing and sometimes a torture. Very nicely done.
Good luck in the contest.
. Rewarded 4
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Very thought provoking. Sometimes cupid has his arrow pointed in the correct direction, but the object moves...some unsuspecting soul gets shot in the butt. Nice job with this.
. Rewarded 4
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yeah
you got about half the poems gist, nice job. There are many aspects of this, so dont hurt yourself thinking about it. I apprecieate that you read and commented it. Thanks
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Very interesting indeed. I like how you used the Arrow to signify love's point. Thank you for sharing this with us it was a very good write in its simplicity.
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There are some original thoughts in this poem. At first reading I didn't quite understand your intention, but as I re read the poem I understand. Very clever. Well done dear poet.
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i agree with jesse and ragamuffin. this poem, for me doesn't make much sense. but ye, good flow. keep penning. you'll near true perfection.
Luv,
Candy
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thanks, i agree..however..
i changed it a while ago, but i forgot to change it on allpoetry. If you read the syllables in each line it flows now, and the meaning there is really deep, try to understand it. Because it does make sense. It makes sense literal terms and metaphoric/symbolic terms and that part goes nicely. This poem should be understandable, and not in any doubts imperfect. I think its as perfect as it can get. look at it now. thanks for reading it though, and thankyou for your comment.
(by the way, when reading a poem dont just expect to immediately understand it..you understand it with thought and the knowledge you have about this world. Also, a hint for this poem..think how love can be compared to outer space, and the significance of the arrow. Think how "light" (in other words, the light in space hense "pointing through the charming sky") can be guilty, but innocent to the eye..think about it, its deep and it makes sense.)
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I don't exactly see the meaning in this poem. It doesn't make much sense to me. But, it flows neatly and smoothly. I like it.
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