You were my God...
You were a deity
an avatar, a zeus.
Your words caused gaeity
and made me loose.
For you I dance
yet from one side
I imagined great romance
that I cannot hide.
I disrobe before him
all eyes upon me
somehow my lustful whim
it set me free.
I flirted in words
that stung you see
yet what is unheard
was esteem for we.
I pursued you like
a fox to hen
my teeth with spikes
tried holding you then.
All my analysis of
why I was failing
to earn your love
is just me railing.
You master of curses
went my bitter tongue
and discovering new verses
my soul had wrung.
I'm too smart see
to take any blame
it must be he
who my heart defames.
You are my Lord
my Hercules and king
martyred upon your sword
my death I sing.
Yet I do know
my lies were lies
each dagger stabbing so
leading to my cries.
Author notes
Dear Zayra
I was reading a poem by Cannonsfire and I then realized I can do your contest because I had something to say. Well, hope you like it.
Someone you know.
A contest entry
- Love's Roulette: Women Who Seduce Gods by Heart Sutra.
525 points, ended February 13, 2007, 4 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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you are indeed a marvelous writer, your poem here convinces me more and more of your skill, love the rhythm and balance with the lovely assonance. I think this should have gotten gold tho. Now, where have you gotten to, dear poet?
blessings and best wishes,
~richard
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awesome
all i can say is very well done..
i am glad i stopped by to look at ur writing.. my u have growin.. well done -
It has been a while since I've stopped by allpoetry and read any poems. I have taken a hiatus from the poetry world, but I am very happy I returned and was able to read your wonderfully written poem!
This poem struck a chord in me as I can relate to it at the moment. My question for you, just out of couriousity is what your belief is in God? From what I gathered from this poem, you may be agnostic or even an athiest? I'm just curious.
Great job with the poem...as always you inspire me to write!
Take care and hope you are well these days,
Sincerely,
~Zola~
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Wow, wish I had stumbled upon this earlier.Well done. Some gods are not really dieties, they end up worshipping us.
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Oh may. Hope you made Zeus bow down to your whims sweet lady. The gods stand no chance against your feminine wiles. LOL You are to be commended for a stellar writ. Congrats on the Silver win! Loved this!
Much Love ♥
Renee
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Girl, this had me at the edge of my seatt...oops, fell off!! Smile. LeT me read this again and again. This is perfection!!!!!
LL
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It's Honor to Seduce One
and so is this write. You say that you snagged the silver award on this piece like I should be shocked. You know that you got this write thing wrapped up girly. Congratulations *Seduced a few of them myself...know you have - smile*.
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great presentation and layout...
-
there are a lot of saying warning about blind faith, this poem is the best example of it yet, you did a great job on this keep it flowing and good luck in the contest
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I assume you were talking artistically...
Peace
He was your God
who feel of perch
with cloven hoof clod
from pedestal did lurch.
Peace
Abdul Tawala Ibn Ali Alishtari
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Janet
your poems always have two to three different moods in them, much like a mystery, it unfurls as you read. You have used quatrain to strengthen your message and your rhymes were on par again. Great work and good luck.
Jim
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Beautiful as always
i have missed this,
you immerse us in metaphor and that amazing talent that only you hold in this way,
this is just wonderful, good luck in the contest,
i know where my gold would go
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Hi, different for you, and good, all the best in the comp, hugs Di
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VERY IMPRESSIVE..
This is a very impressive piece of free form poem that is written in deification of a god.I admire the rhythm ,the flow and the use of diction.
Thank you so much for expressing your feelings through the verses about someone greatly beloved.
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Moving
You did have something to say, and it was well penned, your rhyme and rthym were great, I really enjoyed the read and the message it sent, Love John
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WOW...
This is amazing Janet....
You pulled me deep inside of the emotions...
xo
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My dear,
A lot of life impregnated within this poem on many fronts. This is one you may well wish to re-read a year from now. Revelations from the Gods indeed. Amazing how that works no>?
JD
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Wonderful
Well writtend and expressive. well don my beautiful niece.
*Go with God*
Valerie
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This is beautiful but for purposes of the contest it needs to be left justified. Thank you.
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I love this one my friend you have penned a fiery lament, as the lightning from the hands of Jove
your words sear through the air. This is a brilliant write, deeply set that all can relate too.
Well done my poetic friend, well done indeed.
Best of luck in the contest, carpe deim!
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This is a wonderful rendition of the theme required for the challenge. You presented a lovely short verse quatrain with a beautiful “abab” rhyming scheme. Your imagery makes the read delightful. Good luck in the contest. Amera
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