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Ultimate Goal

Alive, roaming, fighting, others dying.
Saving the world, my reason for existence, my fate.
Some would call it a gift, but I call it a curse.
Try saving one that doesn't want to be saved,
Or saving another, over and over again.
I am not God, never will be.
I am like you, human, with my weaknesses, frailties,
Pain courses through me like any other being,
Sadness, hurt, pride, all the parts of a human.
I am this as well.
But what about my fate? Saving the world?
From what? What needs saving?
If I try, I will lose my life, this I am certain.
So, leave me alone, I live for no one but myself, and those I love.
But then I begin to think, "Why can't I help?"
I have a destiny to fulfill. Sacrifices must be made.
For there is no proof of life, and no surety of death.
And with this confidence, living each day to the fullest becomes my goal,
For the possibility of it being my last is always there.
So I will try and save the world, but differently than before.
Instead of saving the whole as I tried with no success,
I will save it in pieces, one person at a time,
And in time, the sacrifices made will be shown
As each person affects another
And the world, slowly changes itself,
Not for the worse, but for the better.

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Comments

1 - 21 of 21
  • sanjay kanna
    November 30, 2007

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    Goal is Great

    This is a good philosophical poem,which has much philosophy in it. You have felt the nature of the society. Your solution to save the world in a gradual process is very apt. Most of us are not caring or not even thinking of others..moreover, we are becoming selfish each day by the materialistic and mechanical world of today..The last line of the poem shows the optimistic solution for the questions which is raised above.
    But what about my fate? Saving the world?
    From what? What needs saving?

    "Why can't I help?"
    It should be appreciated that it starts with a pessimistic note and ends with an optimistic one,which gives a forward look.
    Hope you improve and All the Best.Regards...


  • violetrose
    October 31, 2007

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    This was a beautiful piece. I feel like the beginning was a little shaky but once I got into the poem it was extremely well-written. I especially love the lines

    "I have a destiny to fulfill. Sacrifices must be made.
    For there is no proof of life, and no surety of death."

    What great statements! I also loved the end of the poem, about the world changing itself. It's really a wonderful idea (though it usually feels over-used) and your writing made it sound fresh.


  • Fairy Moon
    September 24, 2007

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    Well you put alot of time and effort in this poem. I can see that with every word written. Great write. Enjoyed it, thank you for sharing. Blessed Be! ~~Shannon~~


  • Fall.Of.Rome
    August 9, 2007

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    It's an interesting philosophy that most can adhere to. I like how this is framed; you're developing the theory as you write, it seems. Very interesting work, keep it up

  • dauer
    May 30, 2007

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    I feel like I've just peered into the development of a philosophy over a long period of time, at least in the subjective sense of it passing. I cannot imagine that in first grappling with these ideas they came so precisely and immediately. It seems more likely that you took time after to reflect on the process and capture it in a poem, which you did splendidly. There is so much power in the idea that the means of saving the world is by helping one person at a time. In a business if a clerk tried to help everyone in the store at once they could not get very far. By focusing on the needs of each individual and providing a personal touch, they're able to help many more people by offering more focused and attentitive aid. There also seems to be a bit of an arrival at the idea that this moment is meant to be cherished, that too much concern and worry about something beyond here and now pulls us out of what really matters. Well done.


  • ibsons hysops
    May 28, 2007

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    now, now, now!!!!! This is the Poetry I love reading the Most!!! You have such great and opened thoughts with this one that you have completely mesmerized my senses back into the stoneage with such incredible thoughts!!!!! I know I can not write as well as this and really let it all hang out and really throw my ass out there on a limb as well as you have these thoughts that are so fantastically penned!!!!!!


  • Foofy
    May 27, 2007
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    WOW!

    So many things in that poem, I can't even count them!


  • Lily of the Valley
    May 27, 2007

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    You've written thoughts here that are probably very realistic for many people who have thought the world could be a better place if only they could do something to change it. We'd all like to change the bigger picture if we could but in reality all we can do is influence those around us and hope they pass on the wisdom of knowledge to others.

    This poem builds up quite nicely to the end and reflects your own thoughts, feelings, failures and triumphs along the way and the overall message is very clear.


  • grannyeri gold member
    May 26, 2007

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    Quite true what you write here - one can't save the whole world at once, but they can help save some people, person by person, by causing them to make changes in their lifestyle that might help save the world - interesting the way you brought this out. Good thoughts shared here, easy to read and understand as well. Thought all the punctuation at the end of the lines kind of stops the flow from going on at times.


  • LonesomeAngel
    May 25, 2007

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    I love this write it is nothing short of outstanding, an absolutly amazing write. My favourite lines are:

    I have a destiny to fulfill. Sacrifices must be made.
    For there is no proof of life, and no surety of death.

    Those lines made a huge impact on me and really made me think of the bigger picture, the more important things in life.

    Well done I love this piece and i applaud you for it.
    LA


  • Rannison
    May 25, 2007

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    Hey, that's really good. I really liked the build-up and transition from beginning to end. I especially liked the last five lines, they are really inspiring and can be felt on a personal level for readers I believe. There's a gradual growth from beginning to end, and the narrator seems to almost mature; again, I really liked the transition. Great job! I hope to see more from you in the future.


  • Touchof1der silver member
    May 24, 2007
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    I like the way this write develops down the page here and enjoyed reading it very much. You created a nice transition from the beginning of the poem to the ending. Keep that ink flowing freely from your pen dear poet!
    ♥ Touchof1der


  • smileywiley22
    May 24, 2007

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    very good! it reminds me of the "five for fighting song called "superman" you should listen to it if you havent because it is perfect for this poem i think.
    great job and keep writing!
    ♥ Meleah


  • Snappy - Doodles
    May 24, 2007

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    Fantastic

    Very well written message poem. I like how each line was a build up for the next. This poem really has you taken a look at life from your thoughts. It is a very well descriptive write.You penned a nice one here. Enjoyed reading.

    ~Snappy~


  • Maili Knephthan Greeters member
    February 15, 2007

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    Nicely written Piece I liked it very much each line drew you towards the next line. Well done. Thank you for sharing this with us.


  • stormigrl
    February 13, 2007

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    MARVELOUS!!

    Hey what can I say but Marvelous work from my greatest friend alive. What will I do without your humble greatness. You seemed to devour this poem, and I love it!! AWESOME!
    **HUGS**
    Marianne


    • Reece Magic gold member
      February 14, 2007
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      Hey you. Why thank you. Of course, your comments are always treasured and wanted.


  • mattharris
    February 13, 2007

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    Pay It Forward

    The speaker in your poem certainly has ventured on an admirable mission. It sort of reminds me of the movie "Pay It Forward," when the little boy started doing good deeds for people and told them to do a good deed for someone else and then it snowballed from there. Your piece also echoes of what Jesus came to do. Christ's Blessings to you. mattharris


  • star crossed
    February 13, 2007

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    I don't know why, but it reminds me of the movie Constantine. I really like it though. You have a great talent.


  • poetryality silver member
    February 12, 2007

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    I think it is quite commendable that you wish to save the world. I must also add that the world has a set-course that must be fulfilled. There are happenings that must take place. People who will sacrifice their lives for the call of justice. Wars will occur, peace will abound. Everything of this world is already ordained. You are a generous person to have this mission in life. I have learned that I can only save myself, and suggest to others that they be saved. I understand the sentiments of this writ wholeheartedly and agree that one person at a time makes all the sense in the world. very interesting prose here my friend. Keep doing what you do.


    Much Love ♥

    Renee


  • TheWatcher24AD
    February 10, 2007
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    applause

    This was wonderfully written, and insightful. Well done, very nice job. take care

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