A look of happiness on her face
Not much to make her happy
A look of happiness on his face
Not much to make him happy
Two of the same
Fragile young life's just waiting to grow
Playing in parks, having tea party's, and being solders in battle
Unknowing what how big the world is
Lets make the children happy by dancing, and playing games
"Ring around the..." come on "ashes ashes, we all fall down"
We'll say
A innocent game that people play
Now there faces painted with confusion
Smeared with dirt and ash
Now that the days are gray there parents don't know what to say but...
"Don't go out side, don't talk to the men on the Conner"
With shinny boots they marched in taking over everything
The boy and girl have to hide
They were torn apart no longer to see each other
No games are played no laughter in made
Stop this now stop this now
The years have gone by not fast enough
It finally stopped
And the boy and the girl finally reunited and some joy returned
Lives were lost too many to count but in our hearts they live on
Author notes
i know that there are a lot of spelling mistakes but do no worry i will fix them!!!!!
A contest entry
- biggest contest in allpoetry history! (i hope) need 1,000 entries!! by Gasp.
1300 points, ended July 11, 2007, 638 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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this is great! try making the sentances the same sillibles, it usually will flow better, otherwise great job! tyvm for entering!!
~!~keep writing~!~
~gasp~ -
Yes... spelling mistakes and flow was off a bit... but this overall had a great message and it was a great poem! Rock on! xoxo Meg
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You have a unique style for Lyrics...songs of the heart, keep up the good work.
E
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WOW
Stuff the spellin hun that was so gripping. I could be that girl for a time while reading your words and that to me is beautiful poetry. Well done!! and thank you
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Very deep and emotional.I like your comparison of the playsong and the characters now grown.Beautiful style and a very appropriate background.....like a kid just played there.
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Very good write. I like all the imagery and feeling.
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This is really good. It would be a great concept for a music video for a rock song. I really like the inspiration behind it. Very vivid imagery. Thanks for the comment by the way. Three of those happy yellow dudes for you. . . . .
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So many layers to this one your portray the innocent in times of war....what the children miss out on tht so many the world over take for granted. There are emotion fueled imagery for the reader to take on board images that i know will linger long after I have finished reading. They cannot be denied as families the world over are torn apart by war. Thank you for you profound thinking....and for the read.
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