She awoke with a scream
Agony straining her features
She shivered and whimpered
Thrashed and again died
He patiently waited
For the end to come
Waited and prepared
For when she would rise
What will she be like?
He wondered restlessly
Will she be the same
As she was before death?
He knew she would hunger
But how long before the hunt
Would she be able to control
The consuming blood-lust?
She screamed again
Her eyes still closed
He wondered if she could feel
Him holding her firmly
He felt the tears escaping
From the corners of his eyes
As she gasped for breath
And failed once again
“How long till the end?”
He cried in the silence
Straining to keep his control
And rationalize his action
He pressed a damp cloth
To her burning forehead
She cringed and sank away
But he persisted
He pulled her closer to him
Rocking her back and forth
As she grew still
And finally…
…she awoke.
Author notes
Another addition to the series!
It's another view from the poem A Pain Change if you didn't catch that already.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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nicely done, obviously I need to read the others in the series!
First impression--feels like I'm coming in not at the Beginning of your series! Reminds me of a book I read recently, called 'Twilight'. Am I on the right track?
I liked the 5th and 6th stanzas best, where he's doing all he can, and more than feeling patient and restless (see previous stanzas), seems to be suffering with her. I also like the last stanza.
6th stanza, perhaps you were meaning 'breath' instead of 'breathed?'
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Liz, we've already gone over this one together, so you know what I think! But still...I love this series. Someday you must put them all together. And to think I started it all, by making you listen to that song... But I have a suggestion to make about the title. Maybe if it were Watching Death or something... It's important to keep the idea of death in the title (since that's what it is about!) but 'another view' feels somewhat cold, almost like a doctor changing the angle so he can study the death better. You know? Anyways, it's great, and I can't wait for the next installment!
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Do you like this title better? I like it. It gives an impression of death without saying death. So, what do you think now?
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