This cold phantom limb:
dangles from old nerves
and tender tendons,
enfleshed in the raw futility -
of endings.
Able to recall:
her feathered touch;
a spirit hand-holding
that muscle memory and hope -
never grasped.
Reaching for ghosts:
with withered tissue
while sensation floats,
fluttering on skin, feeling sharp -
Sense Memory.
A contest entry
- A metaphorical message to the missing by Dienush.
750 points, ended February 19, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think (Critical Honesty Appreciated)
Comments
-
I like the images and ideas in this poem, they also fit the picture and are unique. The alliterations are very good too. Thank you for entering my contest.
~Diana -
The tv/woman picture at the top puts me in a surreal kind of mood. I think the best part was:
Able to recall:
her feathered touch;
a spirit hand-holding
that muscle memory and hope -
never grasped.
Great poem. Good luck in the contest!
-
This poem is spine tingling in it's language and simplicity and lack of gaudiness. I found most of the word combinations to sound just right, and really some of the abrupt changes in flow really aided the reader in going through this poem. As for the metaphor and imagery, they are outstanding, the loss is just felt in the dying limb.
Jim
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