Lurid tickles
of the red wine glass,
weave amidst
tomorrow's concerns.
Her poison,
toys with my sober notions,
and all is crystal.
My head will pound
in the morning.
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Oh this is such a short poem, with a very powerful message to it!
Good lines "Her poison,
toys with my sober notions,
and all is crystal."
Well done.
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It was quite original.
I loved this.This was done very well. good job for throwing it out this way. I think all of these other talented writers will identify with the idea here. Your writing is almost conversational and I value that in prose because it makes it more reachable. The rhythm and rhyme are lovely. A sense of warmth and light came over me while reading.
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This is short, but it has a powerful feel to it.
Actually, I like these kind of poems since they somewhat force the reader to ponder a bit upon your words. Really great use of metaphors too and wonderful imagery
Great job! -
an interesting and thought provoking write, the cares of tomorrow may wel drifet away but as you state in this very good write the head will pound in the morning but also unfortunately tomorrows concerns become "todays" and no easier to deal with because of yesterdays alcahol
great write
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Thanks to all.
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Excellent
Short, and full of meaning. Makes one sit up and take notice. The title is in paradox when juxtaposed with the last two lines. You've left much to the reader's imagination and used imagery in all the right places. Not a word seems out of place, and that makes your poem...PERFECT! Good luck, and God bless. Be happy -
agree with dustookie. intoxications subtled embrace that overall delivers a drunken-high kinda feelin for the reader with your awsomed & well expressed thoughts you've here.
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the thought of intoxications the demon of many but never the rescuer of any....feels goo but in the morning light it never makes anything better only worse. This is an interest poem and well written...thank you for the pleasure the thoughts i am thinking and grateful for listening to a friend.
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I have never thought of it that way, a good view..beautiful writing
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short but sweet!!
Eh, I like the 1st line alot!! It's very unlikely of a sentence, such work is commended!! PEACE
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