When I think of you I smile,
But only for a while.
When I think of you I cry,
But I really don't know why.
When I see you I'm amazed,
Your beauty leaves me dazed.
When I hear you speak,
My knees become so weak.
When ever your around,
My hearts the only sound,
The only sound I hear,
Because my biggest fear,
Is never knowing you,
Or knowing what to do.
I watch you from afar.
I'm in love with who you are.
But you'll never know me,
Because you just can't see.
That I love you the most,
But to you I'm just a ghost.
Every time you look my way,
I pray that it might be the day.
The day I might just catch your eye,
But you don't notice, you look right by.
You look right though, like I'm not there,
It's really more than I can bare.
I realize that I'm no fun,
I realize I'm not the one.
So I stand in silent shame,
I really have no one to blame.
I don't know why I just can't say,
I love you more each passing day.
A contest entry
- Hugs and Kisses from Me.. by Manda-Lou.
625 points, ended February 17, 2007, 16 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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I really loved this! It's so hearttfelt and it makes the reader sympathise with writer. It makes me feel sad because I split up with my ex almost a year ago, we were together 3 years, and now that he's with someone else, he doesn't even know me anymore. Its like he never did. But I still love him with all of my heart.
"I watch you from afar.
I'm in love with who you are.
But you'll never know me,
Because you just can't see.
That I love you the most,
But to you I'm just a ghost."
This stanza really said it all to me. I think that this stanza on it's own is a fantastic poem, but with the rest, its outstanding. Well done!
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another amazing love poem!! ahha.. you are good.. if i may ask something of you, would you write a poem in free verse for me? just once...lol i think you are holding yourself back trying to rhyme all the time!!! but you are still amazing!
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Great!
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Wow what a sadly beautiful poem. Hehe I saw I have your first line as the first line in one of my poems, though mine goes the opposite way around to this. Very nice, simple, effective, sweet and despairing, good job x take care x
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Gorgous
I think this is a great piece and I love it. I love al the passion and love You have. I can feel the pain and how sad you are too this is a great write all around!!!! Good Job!!!
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Quite a piece of work, remeniscent of Shakespeare on the theme of unrequited love. This is a piece that I think we can all as people identify with, since I can't think of anyone I know that hasn't been that "invisble lover".
The only problem I had with this piece was the rhyme scheme. Only my opinion, but it sounds a little bouncy, almost like reading Dr Seuss in a way. This is only an issue (once again from my perspective) because it has almost a "happy beat" if you will and doesn't truly reflect the feeling of anguish I am sure you feel in regards to not being noticed by this person.
Outside of the rhyme scheme, this was a read that was easy on the eyes, one that easliy strikes a chord with all who will read it. Good luck in your contest and keep up the work! -
Beautiful but so sad. It really shows all your emotion and the feelings you have for them. It's a very excellent write and I'm glad you shared it with me. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck! Best wishes.
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Aww.. it's so sad.
But loving.
Great write Doll!
Angie <3 -
Beautiful
This is just so full of love, I love it.
Breath-takingly beautiful. Whoever you have written this for is one very lucky lady to have such a wonderful poem written for them, and I'm sure she will notice you very soon.
Bravo
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