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Together in death

Death is the answer
We must die
To be together
Together forever

We decided to hang
Tonight is the night

We meet at our spot
To thebig tree
In the middle of town

We exchange our love
Exchanging hugs and kisses

We climb the tree
We put the rope around are necK
We both leap
Holding hands

Together we will be
Together forever
Together in Death

Author notes

I read the rules. op.2

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    September 3, 2007
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    Thanks for entering and best of luck from the moderator staff.


  • Clinging-to-Life
    June 19, 2007

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    Great poem! One thing...If you maybe elaborated abit...and gave some detail as to why they couldnt be together, why they chose to go that way, the feelings both were feeling....I dont know. This is a great...I dont know it seems almost as if you were paraphrasing a story or something in a sense. Your giving the outline. But other than that, I did love the thought and idea of this poem....it could be a WONDERFUL write if expressed in mroe detail, I personally think. Thank you for entering and Goodluck


  • x-Black-Butterfly-x gold member
    April 26, 2007
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    wow
    just wow
    it sent shivers down my spine
    well written
    it really catches the reader


  • burdened
    April 20, 2007

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    This is a simple write, and I can see the emotions, and the true love, willing to die for each other, and ending up dying together. A great write, but somehow, to me, its seems to lacks some elegancy about it. Somehow, death, and suicide with a loved one, seems an elegant and graceful way, especially with the lover. But in my opinion, with a little refing, this poem could have the grace it is trying to convey. Thanks for your entry, and take care XxX


  • lovelight05
    April 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This exceeds the 5 line rule and so will not win however it won't let me DQ it so please would you remove it yourself so that other people have a chance to enter. Thank you


  • Bewicked
    February 17, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    sweet ending !


  • Jadestone Doll
    February 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, this is very dramatic. Just like Romeo and Juliet huh...cool.

    Just one little grammar thing. Line number eight, I'm sure you meant to put a space between the words "the" and "big". Also I think it would make more sense if it said "At the big tree" instead of "To the big tree", but maybe I'm just being pedantic.

    Very lovely poem anyways.


  • loveaswellashate
    February 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I liked this... but even tho it contains suicide.. its not what im looking for... In a way its still a happy ending.. they died together.. meaning after life together or where ever.. so sorry.. but it is a great write..
    Laters
    Loves...*hugs*

1 - 8 of 8