Your ridiculous
Jokes are driving me crazy
Will you just piss off?
I don't want to laugh
At your stuporous sex jokes
Or talk pop culture
I just want to sit
With a good sensible book
Alone in my room
Don't act offended
Because I don't laugh with you
And your childish friends
If you think I'm proud
Full of BS to my ears
You're probably right
But that wont' change things
Or make me care any more
So please just piss off
And you can feel snubbed
And talk about my ego
While I read my book
Author notes
I really don't like haikus but they can be so delightfully blunt that I thought is was the perfect form for this. I don't feel like this all the time, but I live in a dorm room at college and I have some really obnoxious neighbors who won't be quiet or leave me alone so this is in their honor. Inspired partially by "Shutup" by Trew. Of course, this would be one of those extra special birds delivered with an infuriatingly ironic and dismissive grin. Technically this is a haiku chain rather than just a haiku.
In a list
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Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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5-7-5
At-your-stu-pid-sex-jokes = 6 syllables
But-that-does-n't-change-things = 6 syllables
It looked like you were shooting for the original 5-7-5 syllable count. I think a lot of people just go for any short verse 17 syllablesand under. I only mention these lines because you appeared to be keeping the 5-7-5 alive. -
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Thanks for pointing that out, and your're right I was trying to match the traditional 5-7-5. Something strange I've noticed is that a thick southern accent can have a tendency to mess with you when your working syllables sometimes like with the word doesn't. Oh well, I will fix it up momentarily. (The haiku not the accent)
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Smiling
Had to laugh, more so after reading your author notes ...
I can't write a haiku ... well, not without a very concerned effort! But I can relate to unwanted and univited people trying to pull you away from what you want to do ... in the chase for what they want. If only they would all just "piss off"
great, hysterical, write! -
Everyone who has ever lived in a college dorm can relate to those words. There were so many days when I wanted the rest of the world to disappear so I could finally have some private time. I think the idea of multiple haikus is clever and difficult and I applaud your ability to do it so well.
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Ahhh...the pleasure of silence. Its not bad when the noise around you is good noise, but just a noisey racket is a pain. This really was a fun piece and I enjoyed it very much.
Soulful Woman
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You can fix ignorance - but you cant fix stupidity
ha so this was different for haiku
Witty & entertaining - best luck in the contest
_nOva -
I like this it's funny and you keep the story going with more and more Haiku's
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lol
Unfourtunatly
Your suit-mates will not shutup
Assholes can't be helped -
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I'm afraid you're right
But that doesn't really help
I'm losing my mind
Maybe I can tamper with the heater in their room...those crappy old things have been known to release CO... (just kidding)
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LOL. I know the feeling of wanting to be left alone with my silence so I can read or just think. Someone always breaks into the solitude and the moment is lost forever.
thanks for the entry. -
Entertaining.
It's not hard to see your feelings/thoughts in these lines at all. {lol} I understand exactly what you mean. Sometimes there are no words befitting other than PISS OFF.
~MotherMachineGunn~
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