Like the colours of the rainbow
arching so wide across
a pale blue sky
we grow together
stay together
and we are not complete
when one part is missing.
Like the pages of a book
bound together
and well treasured
we are connected.
Each page tells a different story
but we are not complete
when one part is missing.
Like the words of a song
attatched to a variety of notes
smoothly flowing from page to page
we have our ups and downs
and bounce around from place to place
but we are not complete
when one part is missing.
~
Any time I see that colourful rainbow
I will see our faces
and eyes glowing with anticipation
and it will stretch across
the many years to come.
Any time I pick up that book
I will skim the pages
reminding myself
of the different stories
we have gathered together.
Any time I sing that song
the words will stay in my head
always there to remind me
of all our ups and downs
but most of all, of the beautiful music
we strived so hard to make.
And during these times
things will be complete
because in my heart
no one will be missing.
Author notes
I started this a long time ago, even before provincials, hoping I'd end up giving it to everyone in the drama group i'm in, but now that I finished it, I'm a little scared to give it to them...I dunno, gimme your opinion....
anyway, it's quite corny, but I'm pretty happy with it, it's the corny-ness that's holding me back from giving it to some of the people...
kayla*
Written June 14th, 2003
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 45 of 45
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Oh thank you for the comment, no i'm not mad. I asked for a critical opponion. I guess if you're driving too fast down the freeway, and you do the little swervy thingie, you can tip over.. or sumthin.. i dunno
The twist, hmm, i dunno why i had that. Durring the begning when i was just thinking about writing a story, i thought "at the end shes gonna comit suicide" but than i was like "hmm, i think it would be better if she got raped, cause it wouldnt be like shes going against what she wants to feel" so i was going to have monty rape her that night, but my fingers kinda took over when i started typing, and i couldnt find a place to get raped and all that. so yeah..
I really really liked your poem, I wish i could write poems not really wondering how this is going to rhyme, and how this is going to be in beat since this oen went like that, cause my favorite poems are prolly the ones that dont rhyme, they have so much more depth. Good Write -
I remember reading this one before, and I'm glad you gave it to me to read again, because it is quite good. It made me happy for you, that you have that connection to so many people, and even if you are far apart, you will always be linked to them somehow. Thank you for sharing.
~ Erin Ravenskye
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Fabulous poem sweetie! Very warm and heartfelt plus it flows nicely. I hope your friends know how lucky they are to have you.
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Very Encouraging poem...I am stuggling with the loss my my half, but this poem reminds me that she is still there. And that makes me shed a Happy tear
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This is really good! I dont think i will ever forget this poem because it's so true. Really good job!!!!
Later~Amber -
This was a really good poem Kayla!! I like the colourful background and the picture. I can see your Bob in it (I think). I thought it was a very well written piece. Good job!!!
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I would have to say this is one of your weaker poems compared to the others but I still like it alot!! and keep up the good job!
I love your work and each time you get better and better but i dont know this time it didnt really touch me as much but I am mostly into the love poems and death stuff so yeah but i love the background and the picture... its great!!!!
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i dont think it is corny i think it is a great poem......it reaches me but im just not sure from what angle....you know what i mean?.....i like it one of the better poems ive read on this wbsite so far......keep on writing and never think that your work isnt good enough or too corny...... there will always be that one person who thinks you are the best at something and if you have one person then in my eyes i believe your doing pretty darn good
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Kayla
Corny........no.........honest, true emotions........yes.......
Lovely piece and the imagery of the rainbow enhanced by your choice of backgroud.......
My favorite stanza:
Like the pages of a book
bound together
and well treasured
we are connected.
Each page tells a different story
but we are not complete
when one part is missing.
Our lives are a novel.........which is never complete and every page is a new days entry........You just need to get over your fear and give this to your class.......I know it is difficult but the more you give your writing away.........the more confident you become and the more you grow as a writer........Nicely done......
Thanks for the link....... Lisa
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I LOVE IT! it's so awosome I love the metafores! I like how 2 are intertined! the rainbow and song are good symbols!
~blond chick -
thanks for the comment !!!
thanks lost.in.love, but I gave it to them AAAAAAGES ago
I should have updated that I gave it to them back in June before we all went our separate ways...Kyla went on exchange to Europe, Sarah, Launny, Alex, Chad, Brenna, Aaron, Sarah S, and I went on to high school, Myles, Kelsey, Johnathan, Ben, Jaclyn, and Tegan stayed at Jr High, but only Myles, Kelsey and Johnathan are still in the drama group 
Most of them liked it...Ben laughed at it, and i'm not quite over that i guess it was too sappy for HIM but yeah...the rest of the people liked it
thanks for your comment, and I hope you enjoyed that update
kayla* -
i think this was really beautiful! it shows alot of feeling and care for the people that you wrote it about! i think you should give it to them! it will show them how much you care about them, and they will always remember you for years to come! i feel the same way about my group of friends at my college. without them im incomplete!!! this is an awesome poem to express that feeling! keep it up
God Bless
Sarah-Beth -
I thought the poem was a nostalgic piece very sentimental and honest. Usually I don't like straightforward pieces, but I think in this piece you needed to be straightforward to convey the feelings of joy you have for your drama group.
The only suggestion I have is maybe trying to write a more abstract piece, maybe using drama as a theme in the poem. I like poems that are hard to figure out, that force the reader to think. I hope I make sense here, if I don't let me know.
Otherwise, the rhythm of the poem and story was good. I liked the use of the rainbow, book, and song for metaphor. The background of the poem is also beautiful as I love color!
Thanks for sharing,
Farzin -
well thought out nd sweet.
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see that guy on the roof in the background? thats me. SNIPER ON THE ROOF!!!!!
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this poem reflects how i feel with my family, being scattered throught the united states but always staying connected. wonderfuly imaginative and creative. thank you, lissa
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lovely
thats cool i love to read it part of life is my friends
part of my life is my family part of my life is love
thats cool i like your imagination in your poem thats cool wish you happy always in your days
GaSeL
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I thought this was very sweet. It could be about family, or friends, loved ones, even a pet... It's very well written and expressed how one feels when something they love is missing. Good write, not corny at all. I quite enjoyed it.
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This is a cute poem... I like it alot. Its a good write all in all!!! Good job!!!!!!!!
~!~ KERRI ~!~ -
very sweet Kayla! The whole book thing in the second stanza I liked, I don't know, something about books appeals to me. lol. Great job here!
~Meez~ -
Kayla, this really is beautiful. I simply love the way you have expressed your feelings and made the analogies which you did..it was perfect.
As James said.....it would be wonderful to give this to each and everyone of your friends. I am sure they would treasure it.
Beautifully penned.
Ann -
i like the trippy background :)> lol .... nice poem its cute
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wow hartofsilver.....that was amazing!!!!!! Even though it didn't rhyme it went together really well...It kinda felt like it rhymed.
Not that I have anything against not rhyming since I don't have the time!!!!!!!!! But most of my don't flow so good! But as Nam said...A hint of hope yet also somber. I love that! Kepp writing like that and you'll do well!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~Jennifer~ -
8.5/10
Errors
In this line: 'attatched to a variety of notes' attatched' is attached'
Overview
You pull the repetition off well. Most people with this sort of repetition don't pull it off that well. Which the flow was good because of the form of repetition.
Opinion
A good piece here. A hint of hope yet also a bit somber.
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this... now this made me cry. rading this i ws looking backonsome special events that will always remain with me. and i wa thinking, even though, some of thoesloved ones are no longer here, they are mising right now, looking back in rememberance... yuo say it best. not one part is mising. thank you for this, this wabeautifully written and hit home withthe heart. you are one of the most beautiful poets that i have had the pleasure of reading.
arden -
don\'t touch it
Me likes this lots, wow, you really express yourself wonderfully!
I think this is also so sweet, it shows how you care for your friends and I love seeing others using their talents to be a blessing to their loved ones, great job in doing this!
An excellent poem here, it really read well and I enjoyed this write lots, please pen on!
Thanks for sharing and take care!
-Timothy -
This is beautiful and not the least bit corny. I say give it to them! No regrets! Noli curare esto laeti~~
This is just lovely and very well thought out and so to the point. Don't hold back and keep it just for you. You wrote this for a reason. I think they would very much so appreciate it. And if they don't (big fat chance) who cares? It is all about you and doing what you know is right. -
ohhhhhh you should let them read it
its beautiful and I dont think its corny
You shared your heart, please dont ever be afraid to do that...
would be a shame to watch them leave your life, and never know what they meant to you at this moment.
show them
Love Jen -
Kayla
This is beautiful
Not corny at all
I love it and know they would too
Where do you find your backgrounds eh?
Gimme an IM
I just posted a new one
Hope you read
Did you see my pic on my author page i am on the R my mom is L and Bruce my son in back
It's 5yrs old but i look the same just short short hair now lol
Much love sis
Susan~~~~~
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dayemn...Kayla you're friggen awesome. give it to all your friends and make 'em frame it...man you're cool.
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well you know this reminds me of some times I've had, when you feel like part of a whole and it isn't right if everyone isn't there. It's a really good feeling and all too easy to lose. I likes it.(It being the poem, and the feeling for that matter)
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mY broTHEr Golam he goT 0Ne part miSSinG the doCTor, say HE NevER have the kiDS, it a shAme yess?
i Like this WOn POem yeSS?
SaBUr.
\f\f |FF f / -
Kayla.. this is beautiful, absolutly beautiful... please give it to your friends!!! It is so meaningful and beautifully written. You really outdid yourself this time, sweetie.
I feel sure your friends will love it, it's so appropriate for the reasons your giving it. And NOT korny at all, not one little bit.
This poem expresses love, friendship, hope for the future, gratefulness for the past, the here and now.
It's so perfect in every way, Kayla
Big huge {{{HUGS}}}
Dee
Edited on Jun 15 because ''. -
Never be afraid to extend your thoughts in friendship. Not sure why you fear giving this to your friends. It's nicely written.
Red -
Beautiful!
Awe, this was such a beautiful write Very touching and sweet! The flow was excellent Very nicely written! Thanks for sharing 
James
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awwww, this is a great poem. i think you should give it to your friends in drama. im sure they would love it, especially knowing how much they mean to you. it's always nice to be reassured of something like that. not to mention, it isnt very corny, and even if it is, its the corny-ness that gives it that extra meaning that you really care about the group. i say go for it. they'll love it.
~Raven -
this is defintly not corny,
a great expression of your thoughts,
i'm sure they all would treasure it
beautiful job!
~Clare -
Oh why would you be scared to give it to them...it is beautiful and i am sure Ben would appreciate it <-----see through the writes i have become a bit familiar with a few of the group...it was that contest that you ran i think...I did not enter it though:( I had meant too...but lack of time got in the way ...keep up your writing , and stay the sweet young lady you obviously are
with much affection
Reenie
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Awww Kayla I loved this background it went perfect with this poem Hun
I loved your first stanza K
Like the colours of the rainbow
arching so wide across
a pale blue sky
we grow together
stay together
and we are not complete
when one part is missing.
What a beautiful tribute to your friends sweet Kayla...and you are right...we can feel incomplete without them
I loved that pic too Hun
Beautiful poem sweetie
~~Dawn -
Nothing corny about this, Kayla. It is another example of your marvelous talent. Every time I read one of your poems I am struck by this amazing ability that you have, and it seems to come to you so easily. Great use of repetition and wonderful sentiment.
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Definitely give it to them, I don't think it's corny at all, but a sweet sentiment rather. I'm sure it will be appreciated not just today, but as a memory of these times you've shared, and something to look at to always remind you of this time. Good Job!
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GREAT PIECE
I say give it to them because of all the poems of ur i've read this one has to be one of my favorites, now you got a lot of poems and i've got at least 6favorites so...but this one has to be the all-time favorite, something i would give to a friend or two because it just flows beautifully like a song that took 6years to write but in the end came out beautiful...very good...bravo...bravo...cutrain call ladys and gentlemen...take your places for the best proformance you've ever given called life (now i've noticed i didnt spell words right but hey) -
yes give it to them that would be cool..and its not corny..lol...its pretty good actually...So give away!!
~*Kerry*~
Edited on Jun 15, 3:26 p.m. because ''. -
Give it to them, it's sweet, I'm sure they'll all appreciate it
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not korny
rather very nice
nicely penned
sweet poem
~*~Blu~*~
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