Do what's right
Because it Is.
Not out of fear of damnnation
Do what you do
Because of YOU
Not for a mystical man in the sky
Love who you love
Because your heart tells you to.
Not because of a BOOK
Put your faith in those who earn it
(Because they did.)
Not in a stranger who may or may not exist
Live how you want
Because you want to.
And not to reserve a good spot in heaven
Sin if you must
Because you must.
Don't waste time keeping score
You can pray till you're
One hundred thirty
You can stay chaste, or go have some fun
Stay clean if you want
Or get dirty
It's your life, and you only get one
Author notes
Just something I wrote during Algebra...
A contest entry
- You Say You Want A Revolution. by La Tua Cantante.
550 points, ended April 17, 2008, 8 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 27 of 27
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i'd forgotten how philosophical your old stuff is. 's why i reread it periodically!
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I really like this. It's very liberating. It really makes you want to just live your life, and not go by a book, and not worry about going to heaven whenever you die, because you have so much life left ahead of you. This is breathtakingly beautiful. My favorite part is:
"Sin if you must
Because you must.
Don't waste time keeping score"
Truly amazing.
Thankyouu and good luck in my contest.
-Dana.
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I think you did a good job - it's hard to present views on religion - regardless of your believes, without sounding preachy. I really thought the first half did that very well, talking about not because a book told you too or to reserve a spot in heaven. I wish more people would think for themselves.
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Let me start by saying that I consider myself a follower of Christ. I don't like the word Christian because so many claim to be but deny it by there lifestyles.
I really liked your poem. It was well thought out and worded well. You gave great thoughts and insights and I can feel your passion behind your words. For the most part, this is how I live my life.
If I may, here are ways we are the same and our differences:
Stanza 1: Same
Stanza 2: Same
Stanza 3: Same
Stanza 4: While I do I faith in some people, they do at times let me down. Do I hate them for it? No, they will never lose my love but they are human and they make mistakes.
Stanza 5: Same
Stanza 6: We all sin, anyone who tells you they don't are lying sinners.
Stanza 7: The sex issue! This one is tough but I can only go from personal experience. I believe that sex is special and not to be taken lightly. It is filled with excitement, romance but the dark side is disease and so many mental complications. When you have found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, what are they thinking while having sex with you? "This is great" or "This is great but not as god as when I did it with so and so" or "I hope I am as good as the others they've had."
Stanza 8: What do you consider dirty? I can get as dirty as the next and still keep it clean.
Final note: I belive in Christ and belive that it is my relationship with Him that will get me into heaven. It is not about me, it is all about Him. Without Him, nothing I can do or say will get me there. I don't deserve to go to heaven, no one does. But through Christ, who died for me, I believe I can get there.
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I'm very happy that you actually took the time to write a long reply like that. I love to hear about the responses of readers, and the longer the better!
I think I would like you, because you really do have all the same basic principles as I do, except that you believe in Christianity. I don't resent other people for their beliefs so much as their dependance on someone (who I don't even believe exists) else to make their decisions for them. Most Christians are hypocrites in just about every way, but there are certainly a few good ones out there!
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Rosh has raised an interesting point about being anti something that does not exist. However, although this might sound illogical, we do not yet have a satisfactory account of why (see Russell and Kripke).
An atheist could rephrase their thought as follows: it is postulated that there exists an omnipotent being, named God. I do not accept the existence of such a being. For me, such a statement has no meaning (logical positivism).
Either way, being an atheist seems to commit one to a belief that is just as equally diffiuclt to prove as being a theist. In fact, one cannot really imagine one without at some time coming across the other (being and non-being).
I have heard it said that you will find the most ardent believers amongst the athiests.
Who knows, I certainly do not.
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That's basically what I believe. And again, I'm not 'anti-anything'. I just deny the existanse of a supreme being.
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That is right, belief. Whether it be in a god or not it is belief. Of course, you are free to believe whatever you like and the poem itself has a good message. It is also quite humanistic. I certainly agree with the point you make about doing the right thing anyway, not just for fear of damnation. However, a lot of our ideas of right and wrong are straight out of the biblical tradition, so we get stuck again. But I think this is a linguistic problem more than anything else. I disagree with Rosh on the point about the world being in chaos if there were no 'rules'. Perhaps its the rules that lead to the chaos.
Nice poem that has us thinking!
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okay well first off I loved the style of this poem, its short lines kept it flowing and propelled me forward in reading it. I have to say though I really didn't like the line about praying till you were one hundred and thirty, for me this was the weakest stanza in the poem, it is just a bit over the top.
Okay now I can't let this one go without dealing with the message a bit. Firstly just thought I would let you know the word "atheist" means anti God and you can't be anti something that you don't even believe exsits. Secondly if everyone did what they wanted all the time the world would be in a pretty sorry state. God loved us enough to give us rules.
It was a good read though -
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I agree about the last stanza. However, I'm not going to change it.
Also, I am not 'ANTI' god. To me at least, Atheist means lack of belief in a god. I don't believe that any supreme being exists. And, I think the bible is a load of shit. But again, I am not ANTI god. I simply think it's ridiculous to believe in god. If there is a god, than I don't really care. I'm more apathetic. I'm not the type of atheist that tries to crush other peoples' beliefs, or to convert people. And if you use YOUR argument, you're saying that all atheists contradict themselves. But I'm pretty sure that Atheist does not mean 'anti-god' because that would make no sense.
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I have always felt this same way, and have often explained myself as such. Though I never try to convert believers into non-believers, I tend to defend myself quite often from family and friends alike. When some Christians hear 'atheist', sinful, without morals, or lost tend to come to mind. If we lived our lives based on love and not fear, we wouldn't need laws or rules. And though I believe, it's just too idealistic. I have as much faith in humanity as I do God.
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good freewrite just say how you feel I believe its a good take on what you believe I believe basically the same thing but i still believe in god. you put a ton of yourself into this poem interesting views I enjoyed your straightforward manner. finely executed
~Sorrow~ -
(I shall rant on your message because I cannot tear apart the poem--it is incredibly well thought out and executed)
The poem is good, but all I could think of while reading it was--wow, you atheists have such a lonely existence...your life is all because I want to
Never because someone loved me so much, he died for me even though I screwed up.
Keep writing and keep looking and ask yourself who defines your 'right'
Much Love. -
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I probably should have replied to this like, a year ago. ha, but anyway, I was just looking back and decided to reply:
I like to do things for myself, and for the people I love. I feel more sorry for the people that feel that they need a god to tell them what to do. I define my own right.
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Good message! I like the way you think. Keep up the good work you got goin on here!
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powerful message, you have put down the opinions of many in a great way.
i love the ending, it really hits home your point
a great poem
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Wow - great message
I love it! Really shows the righteous xtians that you dont have to believe in god to live a good and whole life!
Thanks! -
How true, oh how true. Great writing. You defintly have a way of putting your thoughts down on paper.
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i love this, and i agree with it wholeheartedly. very nice.
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honestly, i get some of my best writing done during math and social studies. xD keep it up!! who needs grades, anyway?? ^_^
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Very good poem, and written in between two part equations!
I see in your comments you asked about the 4th stanza:
Put your faith in those who earn it
(Because they did.)
Not in a stranger who may or may not exist
Put your faith in those who earned it
Because they did.
Not in a stranger who may exist
I used past tense in L1, and took out the parenthesis.
Very nicely done! -
I think for the 4th stanza, a good alternative would be something like:
Put your faith in those who earn it
Because they're by your side now
Not in a stranger who may or may not exist
It would show the contradiction of the people who EARNED your faith being with you in the moment, as to the "stranger who may or may not exist".
Just a suggestion.
This was a great piece of work. -
Amazing
This was truly amazing. You captured the point and ideas well. I enjoyed the style you wrote it in as well. Overall I just loved the message the most. Awesome job!
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You certainly have made a good point about sincerity with this work. I find it refreshing and totally agree with the message. I think Christ's message was pretty similar until it got all twisted up in the christian machine, and church. I think "Fake" people aren't of much use to anyone...especially christ. good job, I wish more people would live like that, so long as they do it conscientiously of course. Very well done, enjoyed!.
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Nicely done
I particularly like that punchy rhyme right at the end... and it's a far better atheist angle than "religion sucks so I believe nothing!!" (not that I haven't taken that approach several times already). My only criticism would be the 4th stanza, the thought is well realized, but the wording isn't quite there. Oh and one small typo ... find it hehe.
Very good work though, a nice tone and message... killer ending.
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:)
Thanks. I can't find the typo though. Could you pretty please point it out? And also, I have no idea what to say instead of the 4th stanza.
It is a bit bumpy though.
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6th stanza.. "becasue" ... it's a tiny typo. As for the 4th stanza... I can't write it for you... I dunno, I can only suggest you try rewording it so it's as flawless as the rest of the piece
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