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Mirage Of Eyes

The spirit of the soul never sleeps,

as bone and marrow lie within a foetal curl,

it's mirage of eyes

circle its guarding space.

 

 

As skin becomes a resting crease,

a carousel of open pupils

patrol the aura's naked fence.

 

A faceless presence  within our life,

our guide to safety

when our vision is blind.

Author notes

photo inspired
pic http://allpoetry.com/mysticstorm

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • mysticstorm gold member
    February 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Dark and inviting! Well done, the word choice is wonderful and the flow great. A very enjoyable read.
    Best to you in the contest.
    Thank you for entering!


  • individuality gold member
    February 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    good dark imagery here, aye the soul never sleeps, it just floats about. i wish that you have good luck in this contest you have entered. spill ink and twist me into the crazy shape of love...


  • TheHumanEquation
    February 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I love the imagery you used here.


  • forget my memories
    February 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    this is very dark. i love it. its good great job.
    ♥♥
    sam
    As skin becomes a resting crease,
    a carousel of open pupils
    patrol the aura's naked fence

    i love thoughs lines. it just stickes in my mind.


  • ScratchedAt
    February 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Your wording in this piece is artistic. It's also hard to find people that understand that poetry doesn't need to be written with rhyming to become a good piece.

    But, I'm not going to lie to you..
    I feel the piece, personally, did not reflect the feelings the picture emitted. I had to take a look at the poem before I saw the picture, and when I saw the picture.. it just.. ruined it.

    My opinion.


  • Starswhispers silver member
    February 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful I have just realised that I had not read your poetry for some time and how I missed it this is superb. Those lines ... amzing
    "As skin becomes a resting crease,

    a carousel of open pupils

    patrol the aura's naked fence."

    Thank you for sharing your talent.


  • dustookie2
    February 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    oh i like the artwork dark with mmmm great title bring all kinds of thoughts into my mind....you set the atmosphere with the introduction and it jut flow from there smoothly with the style of your talented pen. Imagery full of expressive descriptive emotions...One great message behind the lines we do get blind now and then need a little spirit leading us through the dark. this is just a well crafted poem and I thank you for the pleasure good luck


  • AliceinPoetryLand gold member
    February 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully written my friend. Wonderful imagery here, as always
    My best to you in this contest.
    Gaylenes


  • seraphim shock
    February 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful.

    Beautiful. I love the delicacy of your words, as if they dance when they are written. You write a beautiful piece. Blessed be,
    Lizzy


  • esroddo silver member
    February 5, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Wow you left me speechless. This write kinda got me by surprise. Your words were amazing. Wonderful imagery(Lisa)
    "The spirit of the soul never sleeps,

    as bone and marrow lie within a foetal curl,

    it's mirage of eyes

    circle its guarding space."

1 - 10 of 10