...Thou are the One, beautiful plea of abidance,
thy eyes like a diamond, thy face so innocent,
grace thou posses shakes my psychedelic mind,
in a manner of weird and imperishable substance,
forever in my grief, it shall be a bind.
Thrown in the serpent's abyss of pain and despair
I'm calling thy name, get me out of this evil lair.
In sorrow of consideration, mindless I wander
desperate and crucified, I almost plunder
my memories, exterminating all good I've done.
"Save me!", hear my pittyful scream,
I'm not alive anymore, my sanity is gone,
my life is not real, it's a frightful dream.
For thy hair, so dusk, like ebonite,
thy appearance in the tendrils night,
like a piercing light falling from heaven,
to help us, fiddling and weak craven
my scars are still vividly burning,
with eternal visions of thou returning,
thy beauty is leading me to the core,
circle of life is closing, I'm dying evermore.
Thou, the sublimest creature of Divinity,
shall be in my heart a most beatiful jewel,
hear my plead, I'm not evil, nor cruel,
I'm just messenger of their vanity.
It's all vain, without your red lips,
caressing me in the moonlight,
while I'm seeking the truth, in my deadnight trips
embrace me and I'll show you the bliss,
what'll make thou a goddess is a beast's kiss.
Beast is wounded and through it's murmur in last breath
whispers:"I love you, my princess, join me in death."
Will you let the beast die?
Will you ever cry?
That is left to you my lovely, angelic rose,
how will this mournful book of life close?
A contest entry
- Show me pure loneliness and pain by ThunderCatWonder08.
390 points, ended March 13, 2007, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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I really liked the descriptives, as much as I like Irish Coffee, and that's alot. However, the "thy" and "thou" belong in the antique poetry section and there they should remain. This doesn't come solely from me as a reader because I find it distracting but an editor told me that once. best of luck in the contest.
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holy fucking shit* ive lost my breath wow
your choice of words
the feelings youve put into this
im speechless especially the use of oldern language i just cant speak im amazed by this write i can feel everything its just wow great write*
xxlorren

