Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Safe in the Forest

Missing image

Safe in the Forest


It’s good to be in the forest
A place to spread my wings
A mystical place to live
Doing magical things


A place to spread my wings
Singing and dancing all day
Protected by elfin kings
That is the fairy way


A mystical place to live
Hiding behind the falls
With gobs of love to give
Safe in the forest walls


Doing magical things
To keep the dark elves away
The safety the forest brings
So we can have fun and play

 



 

Author notes


RETOURNE Like so many other French forms, the retourne is all about repetition. It contains four quatrains (four-line stanzas), and each line has eight syllables. The trick is that the first stanza's second line must also be the second stanza's first line, the first stanza's third line is the third stanza's first, and the first stanza's fourth line is the fourth stanza's first. Retournes do not have to rhyme.

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 31 of 31

  • Treasure 5 gold member
    April 9

    Edit | Reply
    What a wonderful write I loved it. I love your poetry It is really awsome. Wonderfully written. It was a pleasure to read.


  • pranj
    February 20

    Edit | Reply
    I loved the choice of lines for first stanza!
    The choice made it so easy for the repetition.
    You are a great poet!
    Looks like I will try to write something in this form!
    Thanks for sharing such beautiful poem!


  • Rebekah-Ann silver member
    January 21
    Edit | Reply
    on my phone.s intermt. red this w a gud friemd. we both lov it! u the best!


  • TyrannyForestFairy
    June 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    ohh this is stunning!! it's so cute and i love the fantasy issue and the imagery conveyed is a beauty, the ryhme is great and the terms put into the context of the poem are wonderful, and the background theme is perfect for the piece. very nice work


  • Ellis gold member
    January 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Poetic Perfection -- Delightful


  • Legend silver member
    January 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A wonderful form that lends itself so well to this poem. Never tried it myself but would love to be able to write something as fine as this one Excellent Congratulations


  • Sue Cardwell gold member
    January 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I feel I must add a few words of congratulations to those of Jeffs.
    A beautiful descriptive poem enticing anyone to visit the forest, if they're allowed!

    Thank for sharing...Sue


  • cricketjeff gold member
    January 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Congratulations on receiving a trophy in "TEN THOUSAND POINTS OF RHYME! - Part 5 Fantasy". In a contest of this standard all prizewinners should be very proud of their poems, Well done.
    Jeff and Sue

  • cricketjeff gold member
    January 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I could spend time telling you what a great poem this is, but you know that already so I'll make do with saying we hated the sparkly background and that gobs of love to English ears is a very ugly term.
    Carping over yet another lovely poem from you and please keep entering the later rounds. Now Ecrivain01 has said he liked the background I have to hate him for more than being a great poet!


    • Amera gold member
      January 3, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      LOL, I can't love you gobs? That's OK, I haven't received a bronze in a long time.

  • ecrivain01
    January 3, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Congrats on the trophy ...

    and on a poem which is so pleasant and easy to read. The background on this is stunning. Did you do that yourself?


    • Amera gold member
      January 3, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      aww...thank you! No I didn't make it, I found that background on the web.


  • good bye
    December 11, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    It reads as if you are singing a song. It felt so real.
    L.ove A.lways


  • Austere
    August 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    : )

    I like it. I also like elves and the like. The thing is, you are keeping me out of the forest.


  • Austere
    August 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    : )

    I like it. I also like elves and the like. The thing is, you are keeping me out of the forest.


  • x Simply x Me x
    August 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    very good write. I could just picture the fairy singing and dancing! Thanks for entering my contest and good luck


  • Random Goldfish gold member
    July 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Very nice...the forest is my favourite place. ^_^


  • PoetsAngel
    June 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    ooooo I love this! My daughter's will adore this one.
    Thank you so much for sharing this with me
    Cathy


  • Artemis Gem
    May 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    like it! nice idea!

    It’s good to be in the forest
    A place to spread my wings
    A mystical place to live
    Doing magical things


    yah, i like that first stanza alot-good choice for what to repeat

    keep it up!

    pegle


  • Tercil gold member
    May 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is such a cute write, one has to write about this minx of a fairy, there is a slight tease in the words. Good job


  • slipperssun gold member
    February 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is a beautiful form , i am going to have to try this one... i love the way it reads and flows. well done on a great write


  • Shantalina
    February 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    You did a wonderful job with the poem, but I see sadness or anger when I look at the picture, but this poem is very happy. It's a beautiful poem, and wonderful imagery, and you did the retourne very well...it was put together nicely. Lovely poem and thank you for entering!


  • PerVirtuous
    February 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Сволочь любит оно.

    I would not cut that forest to make an airport runway! No sir! The only flying to be done there is by insects, bats, birds and fairies! Well, maybe a few nocturnal squirrels, too. Enchanting. Love it.


  • February 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Great flow and music...

    So sweet!

    The retourne is well suited for you.

    You start with four very strong lines the foundation of the style of poem.

    Fantasic!

    I feel like I am in the enchanted forest!

    A'maelamin elear! Cormamin lindua ele lle Amera!


  • mysticstorm gold member
    February 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Now I knew you would write for this. It is you, all over it. Great form and flow, very enchanting just as the picture itself.
    A wonderful write for you fairy princess and all the little elfins.


    • Amera gold member
      February 3, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      lol, thanks! How could an elf turn it down.


  • Aeonna
    February 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    charmant

    amera, où je vous ai fait, obtenez ce fond fabuleux, j'aime ce poème.. le flux merveilleux, vous accordez sur ce poème... brillant écrit

    fleur de Rosa


  • Sacrificial Love
    February 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful...

    This is the second piece I have read for this picture.

    I am always amazed at how so many different perspectives can be seen in one picture.

    This was light...happy. Made me think of the little pixie flying around the forest...playing...and also defending.

    Good job.

    xo
    Sahaba


  • And Hyetal
    February 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    M'lady!!! Wow, I love this retourne form! And the poem was fantastic, too! Great work!

    Eresse Tur-anion

1 - 31 of 31