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[ I. ]

I.

I being a wanderer at heart
And not given much to travel
Upon the open road
Where other men's feet
Have scattered the dust
And left none for me
I have come upon
Sights that
Seem most
Awful
To me

I've seen
The beasts
Who hide in shadows
The monsters that burn
The daylight. I've seen horrors who
Eat the soul; but you know not where nor how nor when

For when they come upon you,
You know not, and invite them in
And when they greatly harm you
You see it as a prize,
Until your angel falls upon you
(Why always she?)
Tears your heart from skin. If you
Don't want to be scorched,
Silly boy,
Don't tempt the flame so
The flame need not tempt you

And when
Your life lies
In her faux hands
What do you do about it?
Are there kisses to be shared,
Loves to be glared, hands
To hold, and flames
To tame?
What then?

Will you float away?

Will she die?

Will you love?

Can she cry?

II.

I came upon a knight on a hillside
His brow pallid, his pallet flaccid
He cried to me as I passed by

"Good sir, a moment wait
You see I lie in low estate
My final wish please satiate
The Last Rite initiate."

Said I, "Sir, how lie you here?"

To his, "Oh! Prepare the bier!
Hurl me on the roaring fire!
Sing and dance as I spiral higher!"
His laughter filled the place entire.

Said I, "Sir, I am nor shaman nor priest,
And you need none.
For you travel to nowhere,
Though you set with the sun."

He laughed, and spoke his song.

The Knight:

I was in the land of Isolde fair;
And Puck and Mab and royal Three,
I was young and soft of hair,
Not the grizzled thing before thee.

I met a lady, in the mead
Full beautiful, a Faery's child
Her twirling form enchanted me
Her eyes blazed wild

I spoke to her with my harsh tongue
Yet rendered not a word
She was old, but I was young,
And had not heard.

Then she took me by the hand
To the town of Fever Dew
"The best knights go on quests grand;
What of you?"

I set off down the forest path
Pursuing my love's Hart;
All the evidence of wrath
Pursued me from the start.

All old men they were to me
Who tried to shout me back.
I giggled and laughed with glee
And swept far down the track
My love, the Hart, kept ahead of me
Now I cannot turn back

And now I fall and float away.

And now

I die.

III.

And as he fell in front of me
His madam appeared at his side
She swept me with her lustrous eyes
I was thrown back
I took a knee
Almost could say
To worship her
Beauty
But no; I know
Better than that
I crave her for
What her smile might bring me; not for
Some old corrupt idea (love);

And with that fixed in mind I am
Out on the chase, Destined to bring
A smile to her face, And show her
What I can do all on my own...

Author notes

Inspired by Keats' "La Belle Dame sans Merci"

(by Minorchar)

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 6 of 6
  • Unowhatthesis4
    May 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for this poem, I enjoyed it. The story was easy to follow from start to finish and I really liked how each of the sections ended; the first section with a series of questions (the best of which is that final question, "Can she cry?" because it's philosophical yet intensely specific to the story and heart-breaking), the second section with those final words of death (well placed two words per line because it slowed down the pace so the reader felt the slowing death that the subject experienced), and the third section which ends with the completion of the story.

    It was easy to see the Keats influence, which I appreciated (in early modern English, not Middle. hehe -- sorry, I'm just a freak like that). :-)
    Those Romantic poets chose the loftiest of subjects to approach and express, and you do a great job at showing the Keats influence while also giving it a spin of your own.

    Again, thank you and good write. :-


  • Ontarah
    March 21, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I stand by my statements before though I wonder why not give her a title?


    • Minorchar
      March 21, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Oh... heh, I didn't realize you were running that other contest. I've been trying to come up with a title... not having much luck.

  • Ontarah
    February 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Excellent! You certainly did Keats justice. I have a soft spot for Middle English and good use of enjambment and you have more than delivered. The poem is long, but you end up not really caring because you want to know the story and enjoy the superb writing. Very well written! Thanks for entering and good luck.


  • briefencounter
    February 5, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Fantastic

    I get the Keats inspiration as I used him as a study at Uni.. Great write, Great read. Seb x

1 - 6 of 6