When I feel all alone
I have a special place I go
It's a little overgrown
But the wild flowers grow
It's nestled by a little creek
Under a big oak tree
My hidden garden where I seek
Our lost memories
I close my eyes like we used to do
And let the world pass
This is where I made love to you
Upon a bed of grass
I never want to leave this place
But our legacy awaits
Our child has an angels face
She came through heavens gates
Someday I will bring her here
To be next to you
Together we will share a tear
Where the wild flowers grew
Author notes
Option 3
A contest entry
- Secret Place (for pre-writes) by aslanlight.
600 points, ended September 1, 2007, 30 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A Random Contest for Random People. by Phiona.
550 points, ended September 5, 2007, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - "Felt" poetry. ONLY by shirk.
1500 points, ended October 8, 2007, 110 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - IF only she knew by The Black Raven.
300 points, ended December 11, 2007, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The very nature of the thing by AaronReed.
500 points, ended December 14, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I Want Some Good Poetry! by kales4.
300 points, ended January 5, 2008, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Branches Full of Life by Carpe Noctem.
450 points, ended February 23, 2008, 45 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Take me to a beautiful place by Yellow-Rose.
600 points, ended May 15, 2008, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A contest about wildflowers for The Rose Garden, Winklings and Allpoetry Friends. #82. by Lyndon.
2300 points, ended May 15, 2008, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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This is such a beautiful poem, written from the heart. I loved it. Thank you very much for entering.
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This is a lovely, sentimental poem. In lines 15 and 16 you need apostrophes: "angel's face" and "heaven's gate". I enjoyed the idea of sharing your special place with your beloved child. Thank you for your entry. Peace, Liz
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Oh that is so gorgeous! You captured all sorts of different feelings and sensations, like heartache, pain, nostalgia and love. Excellent work. Keep it up!
~Cj
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Thank You for entering my contest! Wow this is a truly sad poem, yet it also eludes some happiness with the upbringing of child. There is a "use" in your poem which i think is meant to be "used" but maybe not. I am speechless to be honest i will come back tommorow and think of something to say
Wonderful write Good Luck!
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Very delicate, like a flower. And it bounces along like a flower in the wind. Good work.
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This is beautiful, and so realistic - it makes you almost feel as if you were by that little creek under the big oak tree. Congratulations on a great write and good luck.
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Beautiful! I think that's all I need to say here.
Peace Georgia
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oh... that was an excellent poem. the slightest bit sad, it made me want to cry. beautifully written.
thanks for entering.
~kit~ -
oh this was a bit sad
you penned this with love,and such compassion, as a child will always be left behind,nice post, thank you for entering our contest...SH
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I think you have a lot of developing to do as a poet before you're ready for a "your best poem" type of contest. I definitely see some potential. But you need a lot of work. I would suggest you explore your creativity and try some new structures. Good luck with your future writing.
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A very profound and powerful piece Showing your beautiful soul...sad, yes but I enjoyed the read. Hugs, Terry
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