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Mara

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Mara 

.

I ride as a breath of wind, upon my stygian steed
To quench my unholy soul, and satisfy my greed
My weightless dismount, as an evening fog

has fetched me to your door
Like a key I enter in, I am the midnight whore

Innocuous as you think you are, as you lay in rest
I slither very close to you and grovel on your chest
My corpus melting into yours, a suffocating weight
I sup on you; I fill myself, a feast of lust and hate

Submit to me do not resist, my perfumed pungent smell
For now the lips that you have kissed, escort you to hell

.

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Author notes

A mara, mare is a kind of malignant female wraith in Scandinavian folklore believed to cause nightmares. She appears as early as in the Norse Ynglinga saga, but the belief itself is probably even older (see below). "Mara" is the Old Norse, Swedish and Icelandic name, "mare" is Norwegian and Danish.


The mara was thought of as an immaterial being – capable of moving through a keyhole or the opening under a door – who seated herself at the chest of a sleeping person and "rode" him or her, thus causing nightmares. In Norwegian/Danish, the word for nightmare is mareritt/mareridt, meaning "mareride". The Icelandic word martröð has the same meaning, whereas the Swedish mardröm translates as "maredream". The weight of the mara could also result in breathing difficulties or feeling of suffocation (an experience now known as sleep paralysis).


The mara was also believed to "ride" horses, which left them exhausted and covered in sweat by the morning. She could also entangle the hair of the sleeping man or beast, resulting in "marelocks", a belief probably originating as an explanation for polish plait – a hair disease. Even trees could be ridden by the mara, resulting in branches being entangled. The undersized, twisted pine-trees growing on coastal rocks and on wet grounds are known in Sweden as martallar (marepines).


According to a common belief, the free-roaming spirit of sleeping women could become maras, either out of wickedness or as a form of curse. In the latter case, finding out who the cursed person was and repeating "you are a mara" three times was often enough to release her from this condition.

 

 

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1 - 48 of 48

  • Tirrell
    December 28, 2008

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    Beautiful, and still I apreaciate the info in your notes bringing the read a vexing clarity, this is beautiful and I admire the use of the folklore.

  • Eusebius
    October 15, 2008

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    This is a most marvelous tale and dark poem woven so wonderfully together here! Superbly done with a fascinating note! Loved it! bravo!!!


  • Myjoy gold member
    April 5, 2008

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    I find this one also very well worded. Again the history of the piece just allows one to know right away all the ideas within the writes. I know some but yet to read and have full understanding makes a world of difference.


  • Ithica silver member
    November 7, 2007

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    Gives whole new meaning to the phrase of being "rode hard and put away wet" for me! She is definately the sexiest so far.... whew!


  • LordVampirEternal
    September 5, 2007

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    A ver good write i like the way you did this one i do feel it was a lil to short but good none the less


  • RedAquarius
    June 14, 2007

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    I had read this previously for a contest, the picture reminded me. I really just love the first stanza, for the word combos of "stygian steed" and "midnight whore" (stygian being one of my ultimate favorite words, ever!).


  • th3sl4y3r
    May 24, 2007

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    this is a very interesting write, full of strong imagery and the flow is very good... the word choice and the way you put the words together is very well done!!
    I love these lines the most..
    "I ride as a breath of wind, upon my stygian steed
    To quench my unholy soul, and satisfy my greed
    My weightless dismount, as an evening fog
    has fetched me to your door
    Like a key I enter in, I am the midnight whore"
    very dark and mysterious, well done!!
    thank you for entering my contest and good luck..
    peace and light always.


  • Moons Lunar Angel
    April 22, 2007

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    Wow Yeah I see what you meant by the how it finishes itself and doesn't look awkward or anything. This piece is just brilliant so dark and juicy. You have talent! That's for sure. Thankyou for showing me this piece it's brilliant. Keep up the great work Amera.
    Lunar Angel


  • Bruised.Roses
    April 14, 2007

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    this was a very interesting write.i liked the picture..the format was great and the flow was very smooth...you are a very talented author keep writting
    xXTashaXx


  • wanderingstarlet
    April 12, 2007

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    not bad, not bad. it was different, and simple. i got tired from reading really LONG ones


  • sparkling-assassin
    March 11, 2007

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    I loved this, But Oddly it made me laugh, probably an evil laugh though. Good work, thank-you for entering my contest! xoxo-loserface


  • RudeGirlxSkaKid
    February 27, 2007
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    wow, i loved this.
    good luck in my contest


  • DK akaLunaticSerene gold member
    February 26, 2007

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    This is my favorite so far, Combo of the pic, the slithery movement suggested, the 3 d sensory input was just awesome.


  • Myth Of Twilight
    February 23, 2007

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    hmmmm tastful i like it alot i realy do this poems darkness is ever so sweet great job i loved this one to


  • Shiro Okami
    February 22, 2007
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    Why was this removed from my contest? Put it back in!!

  • Shiro Okami
    February 21, 2007

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    I didn't know any of this. Fascinating stuff. Thank you for including the historicy-folklawy part at the end. This really was a good, dark poem also.

  • Nicole Hanna
    February 16, 2007

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    Oh my gosh! SEE! This is what I'm talking about. I just saw my comment down below. LOL. On the contest page, it says I hadn't commented yet. Grrrr... I wonder how many duplicate comments I've left tonight. lmao

  • Nicole Hanna
    February 16, 2007

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    Oh my gosh, this is another one I could absolutely SWEAR I had already commented on. lol. I mean, I read the first line and could visually imagine the exact comment I thought I had already left. Go figure.

    Anyway, I really enjoyed some of your imagery. You don't wax on and on and have twenty stanzas saying the exact same thing, painting the exact same picture. The "midnight whore" and "innocuous as you think you are" were kind of nice rolling off the tongue. The rhyme was well done and inventive. Though the meter isn't exact, with this piece, it really doesn't need to be. Works fine as it is. I can't say I'm overly thrilled with the content of the poem, meaning the subject matter. It almost reads like a fantasy/romance novel or something. lol. That's not a bad thing, just not exactly my cup of tea. I will say, however, that what you've written is written very well, so I certainly can't fault you for entering a subject I don't particularly favor. On that note, many thanks for entering


  • CrystalJet
    February 13, 2007

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    This is an interesting poem. I like how you based it off a kind of wraith. Thank you for this good entry into my contest.

  • Nicole Hanna
    February 12, 2007
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    The rhyme in the last two stanzas is nice, though the first stanza threw me because it seems there's a line thrown in there that doesn't rhyme with anything. I couldn't decide if it was supposed to be a rhyming poem or a free verse poem, so that was a bit distracting. Though I can see that this poem was written specifically for an "options" contest, I can never understand the purpose of writing poems about mythical creatures or diety unless it serves as a personal metaphor for something deeper. Otherwise this reads as a rhyming fantasy story and less like a contemporary piece of poetry. Opinion only, mind you, and all based on personal tastes (what isn't these days, eh?). I'll be honest and say that, although your language in the poem was exact and very well thought out, I found myself more intrigued by the author notes than anything else. I'm a mythology buff, so it was interesting.

    Thanks for entering


  • Aeonna
    February 11, 2007

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    UNHOLY DARK

    WHOA, ----BEAUTIFUL POEM.. THIS IS MY FAVORITE, SO FAR IN YOUR DEMON SERIES, I CAN'T WAIT TO READ MORE.. KEEP UP THE DARK MASTERPIECE

    FLEUR DE ROSA


  • Master Draconis
    February 9, 2007

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    Quiet a moving poem..the raw power and dominance of it reflects the spirits forceful nature well. Great job Mi;'lady.


  • blueyez
    February 6, 2007

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    wowwwwww this is amazing! I so loved it! And the last line had me like whoa! i must bookmark this one because that last line is mezmerizing!


  • Welcome-To-Hell
    February 3, 2007

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    This is very seneuous but at the same time very wicked it was a very good mix of the do very well penned best of luck to you in the contest


  • PerVirtuous
    February 3, 2007

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    What a sensational job. Flow is impeccable, content is strong. I think you have edited since I last commented. Fantastic.

  • RedAquarius
    February 2, 2007
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    First stanza is the best, in my opinion. Sets the tone nicely. Good luck and thanks for entering the contest!


  • February 2, 2007

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    Polished Perfection...

    This now has a great flow with in the falls off the tongue. You can feel the sections roll out like a gallop! READ THIS FAST... (great meter)

    "I ride as a breath of wind, upon my stygian steed
    To quench my unholy soul, and satisfy my greed
    My weightless dismount, as an evening fog

    has fetched me to your door
    Like a key I enter in, I am the midnight whore"

    THIS SECTION IS SLOWER...

    "Innocuous as you think you are, as you lay in rest
    I slither very close to you and grovel on your chest
    My corpus melting into yours, a suffocating weight
    I sup on you; I fill myself, a feast of lust and hate"

    SPEED UP! to the deadly end!!!!

    "Submit to me do not resist, my perfumed pungent smell
    For now the lips that you have kissed, escort you to hell"

    Like riding with Mara on her horse...




  • Raazi
    February 2, 2007

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    the vocabulary and the rhyming were perfect. interesting topic to write about. Good work. Thanks for featuring.


  • Fire N Ice
    February 2, 2007

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    OMG!

    How did you do it??
    i read it before but you've made some subtle changes!
    THIS IS FANTASTIC!
    and really creepy LOL


  • manoguru
    February 2, 2007

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    i normally find this kind of poetry very silly, but this one is done with great flair. i liked the poem as well as the meticulous author's note. and that picture of a woman with blood shot eyes is so terrible!!

    as someone else pointed out, the "equestrian steed" is toutological. my suggestion would be to find a substitute for the word "equestrian" that better describes the steed. maybe "stygian" will do, since it alliterates with "steed" and would give the poem a deliberate archaic atmosphere. but this is just my suggestion.

    in the 1st stz, line 1, "... ride as the breath of the wind,..." would be more forceful if you could eliminate the cluttersome articles. so the line would move as "I ride as a breath of wind,.." in the 2nd line again, "immortal soul" sounds redundant since soul is immortal. in line 3, i think "A weightless dismount" should be "I weightless dismount". in the same line, i don't think that the word "taunt" has been used in its proper sense, which ususally means provoking. i very much liked the last line of this stanza.

    in the 2nd stz: i again find "bed of rest" very tautological for bed are made for resting.

    i find the last couplet to be the best in the poem, and it very neatly sums up the overall poem:

    "Submit to me do not resist, my perfumed pungent smell
    For now the lips that you have kissed, escort you to hell"

    nicely done. but there are plenty of rooms for improvement.



    • Amera gold member
      February 2, 2007
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      Brilliant my friend; by far the best and most useful critique I have received for this piece. I thank you and I have used your suggestions.


  • Iohagh
    February 2, 2007

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    Grim reaper bootie call

    Darling

    Love and lust combine
    giving you your joy
    as death so intertwines
    upon your helpless toy.

    Smoosh

    You are bad girl

    Janet


  • Mingan Tzar Avarus
    February 2, 2007

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    This was an awesome poem, honestly I prefer the succubus but thats just me. I love the ancient beliefs about demon's and such.


    ~Corey~


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    February 2, 2007

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    This poem has a lot going for it, but also some flaws. It suggests a sonnet but falls short of it. "Equestrian steed" is tautological. The length of the exhaustive notes was, I'm sorry to say, very off-putting, and I wonder if you could manage with something about one fifth the length?

    Ok that's all the negative things. It still has a ring to it, and I am going to give you a quick burst of applause for encouragement.


  • Elfin
    February 1, 2007

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    Wow Amera, this is a juicy subject for us elves to feast upon, all joking apart, you have done a fine job here. Your words set the mood chillingly and makes the skin creep. This reminds me of a sucubus, I expect its another name for the same thing. Well done my friend and good luck in the contest. I was just about to go to bed but I think maybe I will leave the light on a little longer. LOL. Val


  • Starrchild777 gold member
    February 1, 2007

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    Rainshower

    Now, I like how this poem is set up and the way you move with it. Its well done. Two things stand out.. Both word choices 1st -- "innocuous" This is jars the meaning and pulls this whole line out of context. Its a beautiful word but used very poorly in its placement and what its trying to convey. 2nd -- "corpus" if this is used as its denotation then it is very poorly said and needs to be reworked, if this is to indicate ones body(physical/mental/emotional) then the correct word "corpse' should be used. or "corporeal or corporal" Outside these 2 oversights, this is an awesome poem. Love how you brought our sister to life i the light.
    ~*Starr*~ xxxxx

    • Amera gold member
      February 1, 2007
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      Thank you so very much for your in-depth critique. Due to above average intelligence of the readers that are attracted to my demon series, I use more descriptive vocabulary intentionally.

      Actually my use of the words “corpus and Innocuous” are correct. According to dictionary.com
      Corpus –
      1. a large or complete collection of writings: the entire corpus of Old English poetry.
      2. the body of a person or animal, esp. when dead.
      3. Anatomy. a body, mass, or part having a special character or function.
      4. Linguistics. a body of utterances, as words or sentences, assumed to be representative of and used for lexical, grammatical, or other linguistic analysis.
      5. a principal or capital sum, as opposed to interest or income.
      Innocuous
      1. not harmful or injurious; harmless: an innocuous home remedy.
      2. not likely to irritate or offend; inoffensive; an innocuous remark.
      3. not interesting, stimulating, or significant; pallid; insipid: an innocuous novel.

  • ShadesOfGray
    February 1, 2007

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    Interesting poem. I like that you added all the background information, and I think you did very well with the rhyme and meter. I might add some end-line punctuation, because it seems like each line is a complete thought, and it lets the reader take in the poem without having to parse each stanza as they go.


  • Hyper Music
    February 1, 2007

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    very interesting. the red cursive writing really accuentates the theme you are trying to convey. some nice descriptions here. the end was spooky. this is a dark write.


  • StillbornSonofMan
    February 1, 2007

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    Very interesting poem!
    I like things with mythological roots, and you did a very good job, and I must thank you for the thoughtful inclusion of the background in the author's notes!

    Good job for sure.


  • January 31, 2007
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    Raw passion and power!

    This is a poem that should be told in the dead of night by Vincent Price! It has a structured flow that pulls you in down to Hell like "Mara" herself!

    This is prevelant in many cultures the Grim Reaper is not grotesque but enchanting! You have enchanted with the devilish tale!

    Bravo!


  • Lj-
    January 31, 2007

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    Wow, I liked this. I loved your inspiration for this piece, and thank you for including a detailed history and description of it in your notes, I appreciate it.

    My favorite lines were:

    "I slither very close to you and grovel on your chest
    My corpus melting into yours, a suffocating weight,"

    And:

    "For now the lips that you have kissed, escort you to hell."

    The picture is a good match to the words... haunting.



    Thank you for your entry and best of luck!


  • Sacrificial Love
    January 31, 2007
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    OMG....

    This was deliciously scary...

    I looooooove the way you write.

    • Amera gold member
      February 1, 2007

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      Thank you so much for your comment on Mara; she's in my demon series. Please don't think of me as a psychopath. I'm doing something different by trying to express the emotions of female demons in the first person. It's driving the historians nuts because I use real legions and my own interpretation of the events.

      • Sacrificial Love
        February 1, 2007

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        I don't....

        for one second think you are a psychopath. I have written poetry on succubus and many other female demons. The stories behind them are actually very enthralling. And it took me outside of my comfort zone and challenged my considerably to write about them in first person. I applaud you...you are incredibly talented.

  • PerVirtuous
    January 31, 2007
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    I dunno, I'd take my chances... she's pretty hawt... I give three yellow smiley-faced bunnies trained in the rituals of Mayan human sacrifice.


  • Fire N Ice
    January 31, 2007
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    FANTASTIC!!!!!!

    Im really enjoying this new stuff your bringing out!
    this is awesome!
    spin tingling and just WOW!!!

  • DK akaLunaticSerene gold member
    January 31, 2007
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    ooooooo

    I loved this! already a leap and bound of appeal from your last dark write, this one feels like you are settled and cosy in the skin of it! Well done!
    xxoo
    dk

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