The night I was nine

A mum and her kids fighting the struggle,
Mumma had three kids and two jobs to juggle.
She was never home but when she was it was with different men,
They never lasted though, there relations would quickly end.
I would remember these men like a flash of lightning,
Every night it was different and somewhat frightening.
It didnt really bother me, coz i knew they wouldnt have to be my dad,
That made me happy coz some of these men would make me mad.
I had seen them beat on my mum and she would take it,
One night she was knocked out and i didnt think she would make it.
I grew older and i was about eight,
I thought life was cold and nothing was great.
I thought things would never get worse,
until that night that i wish i could reverse.
My mumma got serious with this man named Mike,
he treated us so well, he was someone we started to like.
He was with us for nine months treating us right,
He was the perfect man, well at least he clouded our sight.
We thought he was amazing we thought he was the one,
that could make things better and treat us like his daughter and son.
But that came to hault when i was about nine,
he took something special to me, he took what was mine.
He would creep in my room without making a sound,
he would say he wanted to read me a story and then he went to lay down.
He read the story and i started to fall asleep,
but then he gave my this pain in my heart that i hold deep.
He started to rub on my back and brought his body closer to mine,
I moved over a little and he asked me if everything was fine?
I said i was tired and just want to go to bed,
he pulled me by my hair and here is what he said.
"Dont make me hurt you, just play my little game,
im gonna make you feel good, and for me you’ll do the same.
Just relax trust me you will be fine,
im going to make you tingle from you legs to your spine.
IF you play wit me i wont tell you mom,
let me see your hand now put this on your palm."
I started crying and told him that this was not okay,
I didnt want to do this, this game i didnt want to play.
"Be easy, dont make this harder than it has to be,
You know you are important and mean a lot to me."
Please let me go, this is not what i want,
To this day, in my sleep i hear this mans taunts.
I try to pull away as he grabs me by my wrists,
I kick him in his stomach and his hand clenches into a fist.
He strikes me once the the chest and i lost my breath,
I feel as if i am getting closer and closer to death.
Water is flowing from my eyes but he does not seem to care,
he is taking my innocence away, he made me feel so bare.
"Bitch stop crying, you are gettin on my nerve,"
In my head i was thinking what a cowerdly perve.
He took something away from me that i can never get back,
He knocked me out and fucked me like i was a fuckin potatoe sack.
when i woke he told me not to tell my mom,
I was bleedin and crying and he told me to be calm.
He said he would kill me if i said anything to anyone,
"Bitch if you ever say shit, make sure after to run,"
I will kill you trust me i am not afraid."
I was crying and couldnt sleep so all i did was pray.
He repeated this over and over but i never said a word,
I didnt tell a soul of what had occurred.
He scared me so much and to this day i cant get away,
The night when i was nine and this man wanted to play.