i love holding you close
- telling you i care
i like being in your arms
in times of despair
you are all i need
to live on and thrive
you're the only thing that's waiting
for me to survive
listen close my baby
and hold me long and tight
there's a prophecy for you
that scolds within the night
i love your Perfection
because it is so real
it fits you as your eyes do
so delicate to my appeal
Hey it's me again -
just thought you'd like to know
i'm doing all i can
to try and not let go
listen carefully my love
- hold me until we die
hold me until night falls
and together we will fly.
lend me your thoughts...
Comments
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Like the Sentiment
Good effort! A bit of advice, you may make the lines of the stanzas a bit longer or make the scheme a non rhyming one. Love poetry can be a little greeting cardish. Go with your strengths such as, the good title and the ideas behind it, which is great! "Ancient" bliss lends a time element to the love story. And I love the ending. Great wording! "hold me until night falls/and together we will fly." is beautifully worded! Great job! ~S
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