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Twisted

Missing image
Ring around the rosy, a pocket of broken dreams.
Long deserted alleys echoing with screams.
until death does them part they suffer everyday,
so why should faerytales be anyother way?
Faerytales in the gutter, water smudging printed word.
Mother's hushing babies so they won't be heard.
Sweet blood colored poppies, bring unwanted sleep.
Mary keeping a watchful eye on her flock of black sheep.
Murdered by her prince today, Cinderella's sisters cry.
Alice's perfect wonderland a drug induced lie.
Snow White taking her own life, to end the stinging pain.
The Little Mermaid's legacy the ravings of the insane.
Gold isn't everything that glitters or gleams.
Safe happy stories are not always what they seem.

Author notes

Option 2

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? • Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • ObliviousReality
    March 26

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    Very powerful. The beginning line had me in wonder, and by the end I was absolutely amazed. It is spectacular, and the ending was one so very true, but often used in a dull, repetitive fashion. The title is quite effective for the poem. And for containing as many stories many of us know, it wasn't too long, or too short. The couplet* rhyming was a good choice in my opinion. The poem is definitely one to remember. Good job


  • galdhad
    December 5, 2007
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    Awesome

    Wow just...... Wow
    This covers all the bases for me. Outstanding!


  • Heartless Angel
    August 20, 2007

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    OMG! This is amazing. I am literally speechless and not because I am too lazy to think of anything to say about this but this poem is truly amazing. It's a cynic's point of view on the best loved fairytales or "faerytales" as you put them and it makes these childhood memories painfully dark and morbid but in a strangely beautiful way. You are truly a masterful poet one with an amazing talent and a unique, creative voice. Expect many more comments from me on your "dark faerytales" list but I think these poems are deliciously macabre. AMAZING JOB!!!

    Sincerely (again)
    Lillian Madelin

  • Uniquely-Scarred gold member
    August 2, 2007

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    in my humble opinion, this is one of the best poems i have read on ap for the following reason, i love they way everything has been turned on its head to show the reality, rather than false beileve, i loved the fact that you used the fairy tail format to do this, it was wonderfully writing the 3rd line needs a little touch up, but you will notice that when you next look at it again im sure. idont like poetry that ryhmns at the end of every line but this is one i do like, the darkness mixed with the magic, i love the way you have ended this piece as well it stiks in your mind great write, and good work poet, deserves the trophys and mor in my opinion.


  • mad mosher
    April 2, 2007

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    wow it was realy good! i think the 3rd line is a little rough. But you definitly deserved both of you trophies


  • PlasticPrecious
    March 13, 2007

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    OMG!

    i loved this! you turned the faerytales i hated when i was little into awesome images that won't leave my head!
    great write!

    ♥BR


  • Nereida Nightshade
    February 20, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Amazing a great poem. A wonderful flow and amazing imagery. Thanks for putting it in my contest!


  • Ktulu Blackwolfe silver member
    February 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Excellent write, its very powerful. Congrats to you on both silver and gold trophies...

    **Ktulu Blackwolfe**


  • BeatenLove
    February 14, 2007

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    this was a short but vrey powerful write and i can relate to this..your words were strong and beautiful and the pic that you used was a nice touch keep writting

  • Love of a Bullet
    February 8, 2007

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    Congrats on the gold trophy win... nice write you have here... I very much enjoyed the last line.

    Good luck in your future works. :-)

  • Stormy Sky
    January 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow. I love it. Absolutely love it. love the picture to. Nice. I love how you didn't describe the picture. Thanks for fallowing the rules. Good write and good luck.

    ~poison


  • Buried in Black
    January 29, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Usually i dont comment good poems. but yours was soo like... omg. using the usualy plastic happy stories and changing the into what would happen in the real world. i loved the poem, the flow. everything. good job

1 - 12 of 12