So its time to close up
Its time to make of love a past memory
Far from this silence that breaks through my window
Now open only for the sorrow, flying in the wings of a thought
And from my corner where no light can enter, I see only walls that imprison me
But it’s safer in here, where the winds of love don’t blow, neither the cold of winter’s snow
Here, where I can’t be hurt
Here, where I can’t be loved
Here, where surrounds me what I fear
...Loneliness...
I have to get out
Author notes
be careful with choosing the person you give your heart to, but dont keep it only for yourself. someday you`ll find somebody who will be the right one, and it will be worth handing that person your heart. however, always think about yourself too. you are important, be happy.
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
A contest entry
- Eloquence in Brevity by RatherImaginative.
1400 points, ended July 31, 2007, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 500 Entry Contest!!! ~BE EXTRA SURE TO READ RULES!!~ by kiwikrazi37.
1040 points, ended August 21, 2007, 131 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Poems for my wall by Lauren Noir.
650 points, ended August 31, 2007, 83 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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This is very good
I really like dhte idea of wanting out of lonliness
And I really like dhte wya it was explored, it's something hard to explian though!
You made a good job of it, I think
I loved the ideas in this, it was interesting to read
And really was beautiful
Well done, Loved it
Good luck
Thanks for entering -
This is very poignant. I really like the conflict expressed: it's safer indoors, and yet it has become a prison. Will the prisoner ever have the will to escape? Very good imagery! Thanks so much for entering my contest!
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i felt this one before...
and still trying to find out if i'm still feeling the same way.
But it’s safer in here, where the winds of love don’t blow
i rather lock my self in the corner too
very emotional write
loved every word
loved the form too
thank you for sharing
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It is a form of isolation you are suggesting in your poem where you wanted to be secure in the feeling that you are not going to be hurt by enclosing yourself. One is hurting one self like this by cuttting of from the world. the hurts, the joys are part of something, which we want to see only partly that is pleasurable. A node and anti node make the sound and music. If we miss one everything is flat. Thank you for sharing one version and also for your enlivening comments on my poem...A greatful read
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Great wisdom
Sure walling up your heart within a tomb is safe. But tombs are made for death and not life. You are so right in that it is much better to take a chance, to live.
When you wall off all the heartache you also wall off hapiness and hope. I love how you ended it all. That last stanza. Just goes to show moderation is the key. The shape of the poem reminds me of the ornamentation atop the peak of a crypt.
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i like how beautifully it ended. and you used my favorite style of poetry. well done
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thanks a lot for your comment!
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I know how you feel to suffer loves loss, but in all honesty with each dying love, we experience a tiny light being lit within ourselves.. A light that guides us to what makes us happy.. To taste love is a perfect reminder of our true desires on this earth walk.. Stay strong..Love is the only war one person can fight but only 2 can conquer!
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I think that the light you talk about I`ve felt it, maybe its hope, or gratitude towards having felt that love and learning something for life. though is hard to loose one`s love. And I loved that last thing you said because is so true, you have to work hard for love... but in the end, it depends on two persons.
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We are definately two of a kind. i must be honest I find it hard to read most people's poetry, But your has almost inspired me to not give up on myself when it comes to pouring out my soul!
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thanks a lot. And I read two of your poems and they are amazing!, I want to keep reading more!
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Ill show you a secret place i keep my poems so you can read them at leisure. I am new to allpoetry, but not new to writing =)
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im really looking forward reading those!
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Your author's words speak the truth, and the poem is lovely, the style gives it the appearance of a plane in shape, taking you away from a love that is not good, but I do hold your hope that one day we will all find the right somebody to love.
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so glad you liked my poem!
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Liked the way you write about loneliness in these lines - flows well and has a good message at the end. Yes, lonely people do need to get out and meet people, talk to others and find those who are interested in the same things they are. There will always be intraverts and extraverts, and sometimes opposites attract and find each other. but no one will find you if you do not get out and about.
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an exelent write my friend and i love the style too,good topic that everyone can relate to at some point in their life,
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wow! i actually feel wat ur talking about... its elusive yet soo tangible...Far from this silence that breaks through my window... that line was perfect... thanks...
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I looked at your title for awhile and thoughts of being lonely and alone fill me with a sorrow as i am reminded of so many elderly people who are found dead in their homes alone and lonely lives gone and there has been no one who noticed. Some have been dead for up to 6 months and not missed by neighbours now that i lonelines....I think we all go to this coner to sit out a few rounds on the highway...yeah gave up on love didnt want to know about it rejection was my best friend then i was touched by healing hands and a pure heart who reawakened the love i knew was stilling burning inside ... broke down my walls and healed my heart. You have nailed that feeling .. the madness of protection yet you have the wisdom within to say get out there grab life and live. thank you for the pleasure so beuatiuflly said
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"Far from this silence that breaks through my window"
^ I LOVE IT ^
Heck yes. This is something that I completely agree with. It hurts more to hold your emotions in and miss out on what could be than to have your heart broken along the way. <3 -
Thankyou for your profound submittal and advice, Bella
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